Apology for group chat.

Errrrin · October 2023

Im really sorry for my recent behaviour in group chat.

Ive been really horrible and selfish.
In the future if im not feeling good i will find a different distraction.

I get panicked and upset when messages are missed and that's really unfair to people.
I know its busy and messages get missed, my brain just worries i made people mad.

And I struggle repeating my messages because I worry what if people just don't know what to say. And that makes me feel alone.

But then i start to wonder what if i made people mad.

And i act out. I ask if i upset people. I blow up. Im rude and I blow up.

Instead of dealing with it and talking it through i leave.

I thought that was for the best. I thought it was better if i didn't take up space after getting upset.

But i just made things worse. And after getting upset, when people then greet me or ask how i am i panic. I feel manipulative. I don't want kindness if its forced. What if they don't really care theyre only asking because i caused a fuss.
But it wasn't forced. People are just kind.

And me getting more upset doesn't help. Im sorry for coming in and out. I try to calm myself down. Sometimes i think im calm but im not.

Ive made chat hostile and harder for others to get help. That is not ok.

Im incredibly sorry. Please let me know if there's anything else ive done thats been causing damage.

Im really sorry.

Chat is such an important resource. Im sorry for ruining it for people.

Kind regards Errrin.

Rose113 · October 2023

@Errrrin Hi friend

You've done nothing wrong I promise, chat can be very confusing n most importantly busy with the amount of messages that come through and it can get very had to cope with having to keep up.

We all get snappy and that's okay, that's just apart of us being humans and our emotions when they run wild and free.

We all care about you here and that will never ever change.

You have such a sweet and caring soul Erin. Your truly amazing and I promise im not just saying that, it's true and we wouldn't know what to do if you wasn't apart of group or boards

Try be gentle with yourself

you deserve kindness. My pms are always open if u need anything even if its to chat

independent_ · October 2023

@Errrrin you might not believe it right now, but you really haven’t done anything wrong. Emotions can run high particularly in support chat and sometimes, taking a step back for a few minutes is the right thing to do. It’s ok to feel panicked when people don’t answer, but it’s not a reflection on you. I try to look out for the quieter ones in chat for that reason.

You are always welcome in chat, but I think we’ve all had a time, as members, where we feel we’re ruining it. I certainly have. But the only people who actually ruin chat are the ones who are constantly rude, or people who post spam links. You’re struggling and it’s normal to snap when you’re struggling, there’s a huge difference between that and a rude person.

I will probably be in SC tonight if you want to come along, I will personally look out for you as I’m sure others will too

Salix_alba_2019 · October 2023

I couldn't have said it any better @River

I've also popped you a PM @Errrrin X

JustV · October 2023

I was going to reply to this but actually everyone has said it better than I could. I will say that from a moderator's perspective @Errrrin you didn't do anything wrong and you didn't ruin anything.

You're very aware of the space you take up here and you're very conscious of trying to make things better for other members, but this is your community too. You're allowed to take up space, ask for attention, and have these human moments. We all rely on the charitability of others sometimes, and you've built up a lot of good faith in this community because of how much you give.

Jimette · October 2023

@Errrrin it's good that you're reflecting on what you did, but don't kick yourself for that. It's not your fault that you did all this, anyone can do the same.

Apology for group chat.

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