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I feel like a dissapointment

yanayana Community Champion Posts: 1,277 Wise Owl
edited March 27 in Work & Study
I have so many hopes and dreams for the future and what I wanna do but how am I supposed to do anything if I can't even sit for a solid hour and get some productive studying done? I waste so much time, I get so distracted, I procrastinate so much. I missed so much learning because of my mental health but before all of that I used to get top grades in all my classes. Now I feel like such a failure. And I'm so disappointed in myself because I know I could be doing really really well. But I'm not. Everyone expects me to do well. And on top of their pressure I'm putting so much pressure on myself to do well too. I'm not doing well though. Even when I do manage to focus and study and revise and it's productive and whatever, it doesn't actually stick in my brain. I was revising with a friend the other day and she said it was a topic she hadn't revised on and I said 'yeah me neither' yet she still remembered so much of it. I remembered nothing. It's not fair, I wish grades were irrelevant but they're not, they're important. And I can't use my mental health struggles as an excuse because I know so many people who struggle with their mental health as much as me, if not more, and they still get grades a billion times better than I do.
my brain is not braining the way brains are meant to brain
Post edited by JustV on
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    JJLemon18JJLemon18 Community Champion Posts: 1,926 Extreme Poster
    Hey, I feel pretty much exactly the same at the moment. I don't know what to say because I too don't know how to fix this. You're not alone. Remember to take care of yourself! Sending lots of hugs! :heart:
    Believe in me - who believes in you
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    Amy22Amy22 Posts: 4,017 Community Veteran
    Hi @Xee I know exactly how you are feeling as I have been feeling slightly similar in a way. I also agree with what @JJLemon18 said that you aren't alone. It can be hard trying to focus on work and get stuff done especially when mental health gets in the way of things. I understand how you feel about grades and that you want to do well, and think that grades are important. I'd say really grades may seem important however they do not and will never define your success in life. I can imagine how stressful this situation must be for you to deal with. The main thing I would say is just try your very best and make sure to look after yourself too as sometimes we need to all take breaks. Im always here too if you need any help or want to talk more about this. Sending hugs,

    Amy22 <3
    Just a person who likes pop culture and films
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    ebyrne556ebyrne556 Moderator Posts: 831 Part of The Mix Family
    Hi @Xee Just checkig how you are doing now? Im hearing that you are struggling with motivation and also the pressure. Firstly as always thanks for reaching out to us, you are not alone in your feeling around this and we are all here for you! Sometimes i find if im struggling to concentrate or procrastinating i try and make a rough checklist/plan nothing extremly rigid but one with small breaks etc.If you are struggling to sit for a hr then mabye try break it up into 30 mins break for 5 etc or even just 20 minutes of work is better than nothing.You seem to be trying really hard to wokr hard and do the best for yourself even with your mental health struggles and im really proud of you for not giving up! Im also hearing that you feel a lot of pressure to do well and i can understand how this must be overwhelming for you Mabye just setting yourself small goals each day can help eg learn 2 pages and then if you exceed the goal then thats a bonus but if not then you can say that you did your best and had a plan.

    Rest days are also important to recharge so definetly make sure to build these in.If you feel overwhelmed then try mabye doing lighter revision on the days that you might be struggling to concentrate for example by watching videos or doing quizlets or reading over flashcards etc.

    Sometimes revising wth friends can actually make things a little bit worse and add to presure altho i know how it can help reduce the isolation around exam season. I know its hard but try not to compare yourself to your friends. Everyone works at their own pace and you might have strengths in a different area to them or remember things that they dont. Grades dont define your success in life and your wellbeing and happiness are the main priorities.Yes they might help in the short term but not if you are putting your own mental health and wellbeing at risk or on hold to get them.

    In terms of your mental health has anyone talked about different exam measures or support for you in the run up to the exams or during the exams that might help?

    Hope this helps a bit and take the very best care we are all here for you always but especially during this stressful time. Just keep trying your best your doing great and you got this :)


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    yanayana Community Champion Posts: 1,277 Wise Owl
    @Amy22 @ebyrne556 Thank u both for being so sweet, I appreciate it <3

    I have like 5 weeks until my exams so I really should be revising productively and before the easter holidays I was thinking 'if I don't make the most of these 2 weeks I'm stuffed' and guess who has done practically nothing in the past two weeks...me!!

    I feel like I was doing well and setting small goals for myself and doing the best I could, I was trying, but now it's got to the point of stress that isn't motivating, it's just made me give up. I don't know what to do, I think I've accepted the fact I'm gonna fail. It's too late to really do much about it now.
    In terms of your mental health has anyone talked about different exam measures or support for you in the run up to the exams or during the exams that might help?
    The thing is I have so much support from school and my teachers are so lovely. I literally have all the support I could ever wish for, which I'm really grateful for. But in the end I'm the one who can make the biggest difference, not anyone else. I feel like I'm not trying anymore. With anything. I want to try, I made so much progress when I was pushing myself to fight my low moods and I was trying to fight the urges and everything was going well but I just don't have the energy anymore. I feel really shit rn :anguished:
    my brain is not braining the way brains are meant to brain
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    Laura_tigger82Laura_tigger82 Moderator Posts: 5,120 Part of The Furniture
    Done nothing in the past two weeks @Xee and taken care of yourself and put yourself in the best possible situation to continue revising this term?

    It is difficult to feel like you have to be productive every day because exams are coming up but it is really important to take care of yourself too, probably more so than without exams.

    Your best is always more than good enough. What makes you think you will fail? We are here for you if you would like to talk this through further with us.

    You deserve all the support and I am so glad to hear you feel supported by your school and your teachers <3
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    Iris_MizzyIris_Mizzy Posts: 84 Budding Regular
    Hey I feel the same, I don't know what to say I want to learn new stuff and pass my gcse but I cant and everyone asks why but they dont seems to understand or there either confused.
    Hope your okay. and here if your wanna talk. <3
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    yanayana Community Champion Posts: 1,277 Wise Owl
    @Iris_Mizzy Sorry to hear u feel the same. Good luck with your GCSEs, I'm sure we'll get through it. Not much longer left and then hopefully we can make the most of the summer!!
    my brain is not braining the way brains are meant to brain
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    Laura_tigger82Laura_tigger82 Moderator Posts: 5,120 Part of The Furniture
    You will all get through it. I believe in each and every one of you. We are all here for you too if you want to talk more about how you are feeling. The summer will soon be here <3
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    AzzimanAzziman Moderator, Community Champion Posts: 1,870 Extreme Poster
    edited April 2023
    Agreed with @Laura_tigger82 - you'll all do a great job, and we'll be around throughout for support! Best of luck with the assessments - lots of free time and summer sun are waiting for you on the other side :)
    FAQ | How to report a post | How to report spam
    I'm a community moderator. I'm here to help guide discussions and make sure Community Guidelines are followed. I can't send DMs, but you can message @TheMix or email community@themix.org.uk with questions or concerns.
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