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Feeling ashamed about my depression (TW - Suicidal thoughts)

MatthewMatthew Posts: 3 Newbie
in Health & Wellbeing
In the last few weeks, my mental health has took a bit of a battering. I've had an exam to revise towards, loved ones not being in the right headspace, and generally not feeling good about myself. I've just felt very ashamed and embarrassed whenever I spoke out about it, and started shutting off, it's gotten to the point where I feel "full of myself" or "narcissistic" about being scared for my own health, and that one bad day might happen that tips me over the edge, it's like a part of me wants to kill myself and another part is terrified im going to do it, I don't really know why I'm putting this here because I honestly don't know how to help myself, idk maybe someone can relate
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    CosmoCosmo Posts: 111 The Mix Convert
    Hey @Matthew
    It looks like your going through a rough and challenging time.
    You don't need to be ashamed of your mental health; everyone has different mental problems, and it's pretty common to encounter this problem in life.
    Why do you feel ashamed about it? Is it asking for help that is embarrassings you?

    Cosmo.
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    RileyRiley Moderator Posts: 991 Part of The Mix Family
    I'm glad you felt able to express yourself here @Matthew even if it doesn't feel like much talking about our feelings can be a huge help and often a first step on the road to feeling better. I hope that talking about your issues here can help you feel a little more confident in talking to loved ones about how you're feeling.

    Is there anything specific you want to discuss here on the boards? You mentioned that you had an exam to revise towards, how's that going?

    Needing to rely on other people is nothing to be ashamed of, everyone needs help from time to time after all. As I said hopefully your time here on the boards will help you feel able to seek out the support you need but if there's ever anything us on the boards can do to help don't hesitate to ask! <3
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    SirArchibaldSirArchibald Posts: 75 Budding Regular
    I am sorry that you've been through so much recently. It is understandable why you are struggling. I just want you to know that there is nothing wrong with talking about your mental health to someone, you're not narcisstics, selfish, you're just a person going through a tough time. its very good to express yourself and i am really pleased you can vent on here. It might be good to talk to friends about how you've been feeling, I'm sure they will want to help and support you. Like @Riley said, relying on others is nothing to be ashamed of. There are people who love you and they will want to help you.
    I really do hope that you have someone who you can talk to and remember that you can always come on here to vent if you need to!
    I hope that things get better for you
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