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Moving foward

Feeling better.


I've had a bit of time to ride out the distress and I'm more aware of my moods/current state.

I'm doing this on my own, sometimes I feel like I need to talk to someone but I can't actually do it. I've wasted quite a bit of time that I should have been doing work so i'm trying to shift my attention to that.

I've received some kind words from old teachers and friends,so that's been nice. I nearly cried and I guess nice knowing that there are people out there that believe in you so much.

There are quite a few things that I need to do but I think I need to write a list and probably write in my journal. Right now my problem is lack of validation and I didn't realised this before but past event's, comments, a death in the family and a breakdown in relationship had brought up unresolved emotions and I found myself more distressed and and anxious.

I don't wan't be upset anymore, I want to feel better all round and in myself. I have had urges to engage in behaviours but I haven't so far. I've been clean approaching 2 years, OD free 1 year in April and I haven't b/p at this year. I never really keep track but one thing for sure is that I have 0 interest in being back in the system, I wan't to live a normal with a good paying job whilst making a difference and wearing even more outrageous clothes, #clashingiscool

V :)
Beep boop. I'm a bot.

Comments

  • micamica Deactivated Posts: 98 Budding Regular
    Hey notagain,

    Such a lovely post to read. So glad to hear you're in a positive place and have such powerful motivation. Looking forward to watching you succeed! :yippe:

    - Mica
  • JellyelephantJellyelephant Posts: 1,869 Extreme Poster
    Hey notagain,

    Just wanted to say that I'm super proud of your determination to succeed, I have every belief that you will get there. It's ok to struggle at times, infact I think it is normal, just as long as you can pick yourself up and dust yourself off again.

    Keep fighting!
    x
    The sun will rise and we will try again 
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    mica wrote: »
    Hey notagain,

    Such a lovely post to read. So glad to hear you're in a positive place and have such powerful motivation. Looking forward to watching you succeed! :yippe:

    - Mica


    Thank you Mica it all went down hill yesterday LMAO but I've picked myself up again, sometimes you just gotta keep going!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hey notagain,

    Just wanted to say that I'm super proud of your determination to succeed, I have every belief that you will get there. It's ok to struggle at times, infact I think it is normal, just as long as you can pick yourself up and dust yourself off again.

    Keep fighting!
    x


    Aww thank you dfshgfdsfjdhfdj and I appreciate your support massively:heart:

    It's deffo one of those up hill things and I donnoe, i think have this automatic "get back up" thing and I wan't others to know that their story isn't over, it may take a bit longer to figure things out but it'not impossible:yes:

    Again, thank you Jelly!

    Vxxx
  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,463 Skive's The Limit
    That's lovely. :)
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I've received some kind words from old teachers and friends,so that's been nice. I nearly cried and I guess nice knowing that there are people out there that believe in you so much.

    How have you managed to stay in contact with your former teachers? None of mine would have been willing to do that for any of their former pupils.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    This is Brilliant to hear notagainvitelina :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Robert wrote: »

    How have you managed to stay in contact with your former teachers? None of mine would have been willing to do that for any of their former pupils.


    I was near the area so I popped in to say hi and not only that, I had a very good relationship with my teachers/staff at college.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    turtle09 wrote: »
    This is Brilliant to hear notagainvitelina :)


    Shaunie wrote: »
    That's lovely. :)


    *Nods like Micheal Mcintyre *

    I gotta give us(EUPD hope unicorns) hope!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I was near the area so I popped in to say hi and not only that, I had a very good relationship with my teachers/staff at college.

    You popped into where? Your former school or your former teachers' houses?

    At my school, there is no way that any teacher would have welcomed any former pupil to be in their life in any way - even their favourite or highest-achieving pupils.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Robert wrote: »

    You popped into where? Your former school or your former teachers' houses?

    At my school, there is no way that any teacher would have welcomed any former pupil to be in their life in any way - even their favourite or highest-achieving pupils.


    Of course I didn't go to their houses, I went into college to see them.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    If I or any of my former classmates had done that, we'd not have been recognised - let alone welcomed. We'd have been told that's not a legitimate reason to be on campus and would have been told to leave. You're very lucky to have been welcomed like that.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Robert wrote: »
    If I or any of my former classmates had done that, we'd not have been recognised - let alone welcomed. We'd have been told that's not a legitimate reason to be on campus and would have been told to leave. You're very lucky to have been welcomed like that.


    Robert this is taking away from my post, I don't want further comments from you on this topic, it's just not helpful.
  • CharlotteCharlotte Posts: 229 Trailblazer
    This post has been a lovely post to read and you should be proud of yourself you have made some great reliastion of what you need to do and want to do.

    How you doing today?

    Harriet xx
  • AifeAife Community Manager Posts: 3,026 Boards Guru
    Hey Notagain, it's so nice to read your lovely post. You should be so proud of yourself for being so strong and having such amazing determination and motivation to succeed :)
    Maybe somethings don't get better, but we do. We get stronger. We learn to live with our situations as messy and ugly as they are. We fix what we can and we adapt to what we can't. Maybe some of us will never fully be okay, but at least we're here. We're still trying. We're doing the best we can. That's worth celebrating too ❤
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