(TW suicidal thoughts) I wanna be a real fake

bignosegirly0

Womanhood is a competition. And the prize is sexual approval from men. Thats our assigned purpose as soon as were birthed and as much as I fucking hate it, there’s no escaping our unfortunate fate except from death.

I try. And I really fucking try everything just to be good enough for men. But as I reach a new goal, the bar is risen to an unattainable height. Men love women in makeup, but hate women who “wear makeup”. They love women who “appear natural”, but hate women who “are natural”.

And there’s nothing I want more than to achieve the fake look naturally. I wanna be a real fake. I want natural long fake lashes. I want natural plump lips. I want men thinking I’m wearing makeup just to be surprised when I’m not.

And without that goal, I feel so uncomfortable in my body that I would much rather kill myself than make peace with it.

Azziman

Hi @bignosegirly0, I can hear how this topic is something that's on your mind, and that you find frustrating. I'm sorry to hear that you feel so uncomfortable in your own body, it sounds like a really difficult place to be.

Just to check in, how are you feeling today? Thank you for sharing your feelings with us - we're here to listen to you.

bignosegirly0

@Azziman hiya, sorry for the delayed response. Although I was feeling horrible last night, I’m feeling better this morning.