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(TW suicide, pedophilia, eating disorder) I made a bad decision that’s might make me end it all
bignosegirly0
Posts: 259 The Mix Regular
At work, I have this friend. But I feel as if she’s not really a good person.
She’s a very popular and attractive woman. And a lot of the times, she seems to be very flirty with every male coworker. This includes being very touchy with them. Despite being in a relationship (which I’ll talk about later), she seems really desperate for male validation.
Generally speaking, I don’t think wanting a guys attention is bad. But it’s the things she does to receive it.
A while ago, she spreaded a rumour about me and an ex bully dating in high school, even though we didn’t fucking meet then. I’m not 100% innocent in this story either. But when I was celebrating the fact that my bully was leaving my workplace, she seemed off. Later, my bully confronted me about this rumour, and I asked him who started it. He refused to tell me, and he refused to let me talk to the person to confirm that the rumour is false. So I have to figure it out myself and found out it was my friend. She did it just to get his approval. I was willing to forgive her and move on because maybe she took what I said out of context. But she’s known for spreading rumours.
She lied about her boyfriend being a pedophile, despite still being in a relationship with him. Literally yesterday, she talked about how she missed a guy who used to work at my place, but he was a nonce. I asked her if she was genuine or if it was a joke. She said it was true and I said I’m so sorry. I looked up the guy later on Facebook and turns out it’s her fucking boyfriend. But fucking weird to say that your current boyfriend is a pedophile.
Later after that, she stared a rumour about a female manager being pregnant, and everyone joined in to make fun of her. This manager used to suffer from an eating disorder. But she targeted her just to get some male approval.
She’s literally makes her whole worth centre around male approval, and even other people agree.
For some reason, I woke up in the middle of the night pissed and decided to unfriend her on Facebook.
But no I’m worried she’s either gonna confront me (which is the least worst thing to happen). Or she’s gonna spread a rumour that’s gonna drive me into killing myself. I am hanging on a thread, and if she does this just to get some male approval, I’m fear I’m gonna end my life.
She’s a very popular and attractive woman. And a lot of the times, she seems to be very flirty with every male coworker. This includes being very touchy with them. Despite being in a relationship (which I’ll talk about later), she seems really desperate for male validation.
Generally speaking, I don’t think wanting a guys attention is bad. But it’s the things she does to receive it.
A while ago, she spreaded a rumour about me and an ex bully dating in high school, even though we didn’t fucking meet then. I’m not 100% innocent in this story either. But when I was celebrating the fact that my bully was leaving my workplace, she seemed off. Later, my bully confronted me about this rumour, and I asked him who started it. He refused to tell me, and he refused to let me talk to the person to confirm that the rumour is false. So I have to figure it out myself and found out it was my friend. She did it just to get his approval. I was willing to forgive her and move on because maybe she took what I said out of context. But she’s known for spreading rumours.
She lied about her boyfriend being a pedophile, despite still being in a relationship with him. Literally yesterday, she talked about how she missed a guy who used to work at my place, but he was a nonce. I asked her if she was genuine or if it was a joke. She said it was true and I said I’m so sorry. I looked up the guy later on Facebook and turns out it’s her fucking boyfriend. But fucking weird to say that your current boyfriend is a pedophile.
Later after that, she stared a rumour about a female manager being pregnant, and everyone joined in to make fun of her. This manager used to suffer from an eating disorder. But she targeted her just to get some male approval.
She’s literally makes her whole worth centre around male approval, and even other people agree.
For some reason, I woke up in the middle of the night pissed and decided to unfriend her on Facebook.
But no I’m worried she’s either gonna confront me (which is the least worst thing to happen). Or she’s gonna spread a rumour that’s gonna drive me into killing myself. I am hanging on a thread, and if she does this just to get some male approval, I’m fear I’m gonna end my life.
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Comments
We dropped you a DM to chat about a couple of the bits in here, thank you for reaching out!
i’m really sorry you’re going through this. it honestly sounds like you’ve been put through a lot, and i can see why you’re feeling hurt, angry, and overwhelmed. no one deserves to be treated the way you’ve described, especially by someone who claimed to be your friend.
it’s not ok that she spread rumour’s about you, especially something so personal and harmful, and the fact that she seems to do this kind of thing regularly, to manipulate or seek validation, doesn’t excuse any of it. what she’s doing is toxic and damaging, and it’s understandable that you reached a breaking point.
unfriending her sounds like a move to protect your peace, and you have every right to do that. you don’t owe anyone access to your life, especially someone who makes you feel unsafe or vulnerable.
but I’m also worried about how you’re feeling right now. you said you’re hanging by a thread, and i want you to know that you don’t have to go through this alone. please, if these thoughts get heavier, reach out to a mental health professional, a crisis line, or someone you trust. your life matters. you’re not weak for needing support, you’re strong for reaching out and being honest about how much you’re hurting!
if you need, here are some helplines, but pls remember to call 111 / 999 or go to a&e if you’re feeling unsafe!
hopeline (24/7) - text 88247
samaritans (24/7) - call 116123
lifeline (24/7) - call 08088088000
papyrus (24/7) - call 08000684141
inspire wellbeing (24/7) - call 08081890036
community advice and listening line (24/7) - call 0800132737
knus (24/7) - whatsapp 07700165687
mind (9am-6pm) - call 03001233393
rethink mental illness (9:30am-4pm) - call 03005000927
kooth (12pm-10pm) - webchat on website
saneline (4pm-10pm) - call 03003047000
calm (5pm-12am) - call 0800585858
suicide prevention uk (6pm-12am) - call 08005870800
kelly’s heroes (6pm-11pm) - webchat on website
sos (8pm-12am) - call 08001151505
we are here for you. please keep talking to us if that helps. you’re not alone, even if it feels that way right now!
i’m so proud of you