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Probation review
Invisible_me
Posts: 380 Listening Ear
in Work & Study
I've got a mid point probation review tomorrow at work and I'm feeling scared To go. I had a supervision like 3 weeks ago with him and he said if not errvything is ticked off then I won't pass it but like I find it hard going in staying..
I did speak to him last week like a check in after went in unsettled and we had a but if chat and he was okay and prob a supportive ish quick chat we had and was able to like say im finding it hard, don't feel good enough, to which he was like "good enough for here or the world" and I said no here as in work. He asked me twice (goes to think how low he thinks i am), I mean even if imwas at that poibt then, I woildnt tell him anyway - I wasn't at that point then.
Also, ibd sent him an email your week with it "autism profile ' attached to it, which basically lists my difficulties, triggers, adjustments and my physical condition on therr but his nor replied to it so feel scared in case he brings that up🫣. I was hoping he woukd have read it, responded before tomorrow but..
I am scared once again! 😬😟😧
I did speak to him last week like a check in after went in unsettled and we had a but if chat and he was okay and prob a supportive ish quick chat we had and was able to like say im finding it hard, don't feel good enough, to which he was like "good enough for here or the world" and I said no here as in work. He asked me twice (goes to think how low he thinks i am), I mean even if imwas at that poibt then, I woildnt tell him anyway - I wasn't at that point then.
Also, ibd sent him an email your week with it "autism profile ' attached to it, which basically lists my difficulties, triggers, adjustments and my physical condition on therr but his nor replied to it so feel scared in case he brings that up🫣. I was hoping he woukd have read it, responded before tomorrow but..
I am scared once again! 😬😟😧
1
Comments
It sounds as if your boss isn't being the most reassuring to you and the vagueness is leaving you feeling quite unsettled, which is really understandable because it can be nice to know where you stand right, especially when you went out of your way to send him something vulnerable. ]
I'm wondering how this ended up going for you? We are here if you need to get anything off your chest about how this went.
Hi thank you for replying. I'm finding him a very contradicting character to try abd understand. Like I tgibk his getting there in terms of understand ans suppirt me after the last vhat we had last thyrs and some stuff he mentioned during review yesterday byt yet his in the flip side as well.
He came in late (from overtime prev day), he was constantly flickering the lights switches on and off adjusting the lighting if room but constantly like a goof 5 mins (no exaggeration) this was distressing me, and I was covering my eyes etc thrn after he stopped, i uncovered and tries to self calm by doodling etc then he comes over to me asks how I am abd then said am I annoying you? Yet he knows, I have autism and lighting sound is a issues for me (he brought this up himself when I said I was autistic) but yet he goes flickering tge switches where there was no real need for it thdn asks if I was annoyed by him. Is that him trying to "press my buttons/test my patience or he asking because he thinks I'm finding him annoying.
Meeting- on track. Ohgh yesh but like on the code if conduct, be asked what I thought on track not in track. I said in track then he said "yeah so not on track laughs tgen says sorry you are on track" like he was cracking a joke. Ive vocalised to him few times (even during on groubd work), I don't understand jokes, am literal. It's playing in my head! 🤨 but then lke before the question in code of conduct, he said I domstatr braveness by coming in when it's hard. So..🤷♀️
He was like I feel like we're building a rapport, I've dome my l3 counselling skills and so I cam tell when your having a bad day your whole body language changes, you make reduced eye contact abd while i might knoe this, other managers don't therefore it might be worth having a think how I communicate to them im n having a bad or struggling, for when he isn't in. He thought if this he said upon reflection from our conversation then a line management with his manager... which I do kinda gibe him, he can notice when I'm unsettled considering he doesn't know me wouldn't go to extent where we are getting a rapport though!
Document, - he said hid not had chance to read it will read it but when he gets time and he camt open it because he doesn't hsve access to my records which will gibe him the password to open in. But then daid I'm not z snooker to read stuff not relevant or not whst his supposed to sp won't but will. Again this sounds to me contradicting you going to, or not?,