I’m feeling extremely lonely right now

JMMV2005

I’ve been feeling alright until recently, for the last couple of days I feel like I’ve been getting depressed about being lonely literally everyday, I used to be able to take my mind off it but obviously the feeling has got stronger and now I can’t stop focusing on it

I need to see some serious change some point soon, like I gotta start making friendships or relationships some point soon or this feeling is gonna get worse, but I don’t know what to do, I’m trying to join clubs and go to things but I always have to wait ages for these things and there is no guarantee I’m actually gonna meet anyone on these things anyway, I joined a sort of anxiety management course with people who also struggle with anxiety but so far I’ve talked to no one and there is only 3 weeks left, I guess it’s not really a social group and I need a social group but I don’t know of any near me, I’m gonna ask the people that run this course and see if they know of any social groups because honestly I am absolutely sick and tired of being alone and I’m running out of energy to cope with it, and everything I try is vague and there is no guarantee it’ll help me, I need a route out of this and to actually see some progress because for like four years I’ve been completely alone with no progress out of it, in fact I’ve pretty much been alone my whole life and I’m honestly worried I’ve set myself up to be alone by not socialising enough in the past, I just wanna live my life and I feel like my loneliness is stopping me from doing that

If any of you have any advice of things I can try I’d appreciate it, I am trying joining clubs but progress feels really slow because I have to wait ages for clubs and things to start and I’m struggling to find things to try in my area

I guess I just gotta keep fighting but at this moment I’m so exhausted of fighting and not seeing any change, if I get to the end of 2025 and see not enough progress despite my efforts I’m gonna seriously mentally struggle, I’m just so scared of being alone I can’t go through my life alone I need people otherwise it’ll be too hard to cope, it genuinely feels like I’m fighting for my life because I don’t see a life for myself if I end up alone

I’m just so tired and confused at the moment and I don’t know what the hell to do and most of all I am absolutely excruciatingly sick and tired of the loneliness I’m carrying on my back every single fucking day

Sorry for rant but again I need to get this off my mind somewhere or it’s gonna eat at me

Azziman

Hey @JMMV2005, thank you for sharing your experience with us. I can hear how difficult this feeling of loneliness has been for you, and that it's taking a toll on your mental health. Feeling isolated and lonely is a difficult feeling especially if it becomes "routine". Trying to reconnect with people and break out of that "routine" can then feel like an increasingly harder task the longer it goes on, so your feelings and concerns about this situation are valid.

It's encouraging to hear that you've recognised the situation and want to do something about it - that's often the first and hardest step, so well done for that. You've sought out clubs, taken on a course to help manage your mental wellbeing, and are looking to ask for help on finding social groups - don't underestimate how difficult it is to take these steps when you're in this situation, you're making some good progress in that sense already.

Asking about social groups in particular is a great idea - not just for someone who feels lonely, but in general. It's a great way to share what you're interested in, and communicating that to people around you is a good way to find groups or events that align with that. Also, when you find someone that you're getting on with, staying in touch between events is important as regular contact is a big help to establishing that connection. I'd also consider using apps like Meetup as that's a popular place for people to advertise social groups, and local community spaces (e.g. GP, church) often have a noticeboard where social groups and clubs advertise themselves.

I can hear difficult the situation is for you, but I'm happy to hear that you're taking good steps to change how things are. Taking an interest and being proactive about changing a situation you're not happy about is a good attitude to have, and engaging with people to help you do that is a great way to achieve that. Let us know how you're getting on with your journey, we're here to support you and listen to you through this