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Im a let down

TheNightmareTheNightmare Posts: 2,750 Boards Guru
edited December 2024 in Health & Wellbeing
I'm sorry I'm like a broken record, repeating myself all the time, please allow me. I’ve come to realize that I’m not where I want to be in life, and it’s frustrating. I can’t help but compare myself to others, and it feels like everyone around me is ahead, regardless of age. There are things that people in their 20s have, like starting families, moving out, or getting married, that I don’t necessarily want yet, but there are things I would’ve hoped for by now like having a job, savings, a routine, more friends, and a girlfriend. I feel behind because I don’t have these things, and it seems like everyone else does. Even though some of these achievements I might not be ready for or want, seeing others hit these milestones makes me feel like I’m falling short. I know it’s not a race, but I feel a lot of pressure. I don’t always validate my progress, and I often think my achievements aren’t enough compared to what others have done.

It’s hard because, although I know things aren’t always as they seem, when I see people graduating, getting married, having children, or moving out, I can’t help but feel like I’m missing out. I don’t like to share where I am in life because people can be judgmental, and I don’t really have any social interaction. I’ve had people close to me call me a waste of space, and it hurts. I’m not working, don’t have an income, barely go out, don’t have many friends, no girlfriend, no achievements, no savings, and I still live at home. I often frustrate people by saying or doing stupid things, which makes me feel like I can't do anything right. I can't even look after myself, so how could I handle more responsibilities?

It’s like I’m so behind, and not just in the sense of living at home or not having a girlfriend. It’s everything else no job, no income, no achievements and I struggle to find things to do that feel productive. I put a lot of self-pressure on myself, and though I’m not getting much criticism, I still feel like I’m falling behind. It’s hard not to feel bad about myself when others could be critical or judgmental. I don’t validate my own progress, and while others might say I’ve matured, it doesn’t feel like it’s enough. I’ve made progress in the past year or two, but it’s not enough when I compare myself to huge milestones like graduating or getting married.

I’m really trying to change because I’m afraid I’ll lose hope if things don’t improve. I’m putting in effort, but it doesn’t seem to pay off, and sometimes I wonder why it’s so tough. I’ve seen others get jobs faster, and it makes me think maybe it’s something about me. I’m really sensitive to comments about my situation, like when people point out I don’t have a job. It hurts because things feel so overwhelming. I need things to get better, and I’m fully relying on it. The fear that things won’t improve is always there, but I keep telling myself that everyone must settle at some point. It just sucks to feel stuck and like I’m not where I want to be. I’m sorry for saying this again, but this all I have got.

Comments

  • Rose113Rose113 Community Champion Posts: 2,818 Boards Guru
    Your on your own journey and your own path and overtime you will find the right path that your meant to be on :) just take your time and don’t rush yourself
    Want to hurt me… go ahead
    Wish to bully me…I’m used to it
    Want to talk crap about me…go on then
    Want to make me cry…feel free
  • eylaheylah Posts: 5,828 Part of The Furniture
    this community space is yours as much as anybody else’s your not repeating yourself even if you was thats ok bc you are allowed to offload and ask for help. you are on your own path and yes you might not be like any other 20 odd year old thats ok bc we’re all different we all have our differences and we all have our different paths. you will have ups & downs but your doing amazing ❤️
    keep your face always toward the sunshine and shadows will fall behind you. 🤍

    pfp made by @Chloe234 ❤️
  • shannon_164shannon_164 Posts: 540 Incredible Poster
    @TheNightmare i totally understand why you might be feeling like a broken record as you’ve said, but everything you feel is so so valid and if you need to say it everyday of the week then that’s what you gotta do!! you have as much right to share how you feel in this space as everyone else here.

    i know that you feel that you need to compare yourself to others in life and you’re not where you want to be but it’s really important to remember that this is YOUR life and YOUR journey - you don’t need to be in the same place as everybody else as you are you’re own person!

    one day you’re going to be exactly where you want in life as you clearly are such a hard working and determined person who has goals that they are most definitely going to achieve, given how hardworking and determined you are! that day might come sooner than you think too, i see from all your posts on here about feeling this way how hard you are trying and i’m so proud of you for continuing every single day when you might be feeling deflated with it all, but you keep going always.

    i also just want to say you don’t have to apologise for sharing this again, as i said you should share it as many times as you need to! how you feel is how you feel and that is so so valid, and it’s actually a super brave thing to share your feelings too! i’m really proud of you for continuing to keep going everyday, you’re doing amazing🤍
  • TheNightmareTheNightmare Posts: 2,750 Boards Guru
    Rose113 wrote: »
    Your on your own journey and your own path and overtime you will find the right path that your meant to be on :) just take your time and don’t rush yourself
    eylah wrote: »
    this community space is yours as much as anybody else’s your not repeating yourself even if you was thats ok bc you are allowed to offload and ask for help. you are on your own path and yes you might not be like any other 20 odd year old thats ok bc we’re all different we all have our differences and we all have our different paths. you will have ups & downs but your doing amazing ❤️

    Thanks so much means a lot and what you are both saying is true.
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