Unsent letters

Dancer

I know that there was something similar to this a couple of years ago but I wanted to make my own one so I don't bring up a dead thread. This is for you to do letters to people that have hurt you in the past (obviously anonymously though.) You don't have to actually send them to the person but posting it on here can help you to get it off your chest. Please use a spoiler if it could be triggering.

Dancer

To my year 6 teacher,

You destroyed my confidence and made me feel like I was difficult or a bad child when actually I had undiagnosed autism. You saw the signs and constantly complained to my mum. Instead of spending loads of time complaining, why didn't you try and do something to see if something was wrong? Instead it took until year 8 for someone to make a referral for an assessment and until year 10 to be diagnosed. And yes I did manage to pass my GCSE's. I've ended up feeling confused about who I am and I barely have any friends my own age. If I was diagnosed earlier on, I could have gotten help earlier on. Why did you spend more time focusing on football than schoolwork? If you didn't want to teach the class, don't be a teacher. I get it if it was just an occasional thing of football but it was nearly every week and sometimes multiple times a week. When I got to secondary school, I struggled with my work no thanks to you. I'm glad to see you've left the school.

Dancer

To the old SENCO in my primary school,

Where were you when I needed you? The teachers saw the signs of my autism and my mum kept pushing for me to be assessed. But no. Most of the time you weren't even there and when you were, you blamed it on my speech delay. Well if the speech delay was solved but I was still struggling socially, isn't that supposed to indicate that something was wrong? Eventually I got a diagnosis in year 10. I've ended up so confused about myself after the diagnosis. I don't fully blame you though. The assessment process takes a long time but surely you could have done something whilst you had the chance but you didn't.

Former Member

Spoiler might be triggering!

Dear My Brother’s Dad,

Why. Why the fuck did you think any of what you did was ok!? I was 13 and having to know what a physc ward was, and I was 10 when I had to learn why alcohol was bad. Don’t you think I was too young? Don’t you think forcing me to go outside even when it was cold and I didn’t have many friends was selfish and narcissistic considering you only did it so you could get some sleep? You could’ve told me you was tired and I would’ve tried be quiet. Or when I was reading and I got distracted a few seconds before you came up so you tried say I was lying about reading, even though my book was right there. And people wonder why I have trust issues. Why I’m fucked in the head. Maybe look in a god damn mirror and you’ll learn why. Don’t even get me started on what a arsehole you was to my brother. You refused to believe he is autistic(and just to piss you of I’ll let you know I also have autism as well as ADHD so suck on that) even though he ticks every box. You even knew he was diagnosed and yet tried saying the doctors just wanted label him. Would mum had gone in the second time if that was the case? No you absolute idiot. He needed routine when he went for your dumb sleepovers but instead you picked stupid girls over your own son only to say very late he could come and by the time he got home he’d mask so much that he’d constantly lash out. He is so much better now you are out of his life and I’m so fucking happy about that. There’s not a single day I don’t panic about turning into you. You raised me after all. I hope when I’m a parent I’m nothing like you. I would never force them up late just so you could sleep more in morning, I would never call them a spoilt brat just for standing up to me, and I would never fucking throw empty bottles at a wall so close to a 4 year old boy’s head. I hate you. I fucking want you to know that.

Dancer

To the girls in my Health and Social Care class who keep on messing around,

Nobody is forcing you to go to the lessons. Nobody forced you to do Health and Social Care. Nobody forced you to go to sixth form. It was all your choice. So why are you there? You clearly don't want to be there otherwise you wouldn't be messing about all the time causing us all a headache. Just shut up and do your work and stop arguing with the teacher. Be the bigger person as she clearly won't be.

Dancer

To my anxiety,

Why just why?

Dancer

To Mum,

You scare me sometimes with how you can be unpredictable. You wonder why I don`t confide in you about stuff that is bothering me but isn`t it obvious? I have no idea how you will react and that scares me. It`s like when you yelled at me for being too anxious to go and pick up the stuff from that house. I hide a lot of my anxiety from you. It`s not ideal but I don`t know if I can trust you with it. It`s sad because I love you and I want to be open as being open is the first step to recovering. One minute you can be really happy and making jokes and then the next you can be yelling and swearing.