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I'm not doing good
JJLemon18
Posts: 2,055 Boards Champion
Every time I tell myself that things can't get any worse, they fucking get worse. My dad ended up in hospital yesterday from a serious accident at work. And from my mum's reaction and what she said (cause she visited him and I havent cause I'm ill), I am absolutely terrified and devastated. Everything keeps getting worse and worse, I don't know what to do. All of this is making me feel sick and lightheaded.
I made a huge post venting about everything, but I wrote it yesterday at 4am (I didn't sleep btw) and the more and more I reread it, the more I don't want to post it. Its bad, like real bad. I'm not sure what to do, cause posting it feels like the wrong thing, like it feels too personal and like just 'too much' to post on the Internet for everyone to see. Plus I don't see what help it could do beside just being a 'vent' from me. I just don't know what else I can do. I feel totally lost and given up.
I made a huge post venting about everything, but I wrote it yesterday at 4am (I didn't sleep btw) and the more and more I reread it, the more I don't want to post it. Its bad, like real bad. I'm not sure what to do, cause posting it feels like the wrong thing, like it feels too personal and like just 'too much' to post on the Internet for everyone to see. Plus I don't see what help it could do beside just being a 'vent' from me. I just don't know what else I can do. I feel totally lost and given up.
Believe in me - who believes in you
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Comments
How do I combat all this s**t T_T
Sorry I took so long to reply. I have so much spare time but I find it so hard to even come on here to reply. I can't be motivated with everything, all I feel like doing is lying on the sofa and playing videogames. Its so sad.
And no, I don't really have anyone to talk to (beside this community). I have opened up to my 'friends' about this and they all read my message and have not replied, though one of them did eventually reply later saying he's sorry to hear that, and that if I need anything I can ask them. Nothing else. (I'm guessing they don't know you can check who has read your messages on a whatsapp group chat, so they were all waiting to see who speaks first lol). It just hurts. I wish I could meet one person who actually cares...
I'm sorry to hear that your friends didn't respond when you needed them, I can hear how that hurt you, because you want to be heard. And you deserve to be heard, because your feelings do matter, and you matter
Take things one day at a time, and remember we're here to support you through this. You're not alone
I will probably post that vent a bit later. Although so much time has now passed that it feels almost meaningless. But whatever.
Also I get you about oversharing things and venting as oversharing can cause us to feel tired and feel weird too about ourselves. Though as @JustV mentioned sometimes having a 'unfiltered' view and vent can be a good healthy way of offloading things on our minds. Always feel welcome to vent on here as much as you want to, even it is just a few words or long, we are here for you. I think its good that you can vent on here too and express your feelings. Always here if you feel comfortable talking more about things
Sending hugs,
Amy22
I'm so sorry this sounds so frightening and disturbing for you, how are you doing now? I hope your dad is doing OK, and that things are calming down now. Sounds like you didn't have much support during this crisis, that must have been really hard. I'm not surprised you're struggling seeing your dad again, it's really weird and scary seeing people we love in a vulnerable/injured state. Go for it if you need to vent here This kind of situation creates all kinds of feelings, and/or numbness, dissociation etc. Be gentle with yourself and remember you're doing really well Am thinking of you!
but let this sink in
you do not have to fight by yourself
~ lyrics from Willow by The Little Unsaid
@sputnik Thank you. I'm feeling meh, quite a bit dissociated I think. It's hard to tell what's real and what isn't. All of this just feels strange.
If you're hesitant about sharing a post online, that's perfectly okay. You should only share what you feel comfortable with. If you have close friends or family you trust, consider confiding in them. Sometimes talking to someone you trust can be incredibly relieving and provide emotional support.
Additionally, reaching out to a mental health professional or counselor can offer guidance and strategies for coping during these difficult times. They can help you navigate the overwhelming emotions you're experiencing.
It's important to take care of your mental and physical health, especially in challenging situations. If you're feeling lightheaded or physically unwell, it's essential to consult with a healthcare provider.
Remember, tough times can eventually subside, and support from others can make a significant difference. Don't hesitate to reach out to those who care about you or to seek professional help when needed. Your well-being matters.
I guess that is also okay as you can edit and change as much as you need to really with a vent. I tend to do the same sometimes. I don't think your strange for having to edit your vents