When will the pain stop?

spacedog

I don't know what to say or do or even think anymore, I feel like all I need is words of reassurance but I don't know what about - even just somebody to talk to me. The emotional exhaustion of living this way but then after my failed attempts the exhaustion of having to put up with that too. I want to live but I want to die too - I cant die and leave my new puppy, my family, my future, but neither will I be able to live a fulfilling life with the way I am - to me what I have to put up with day by day is absolute torture. There's no official treatment for my condition, so my only future steps are to find ways to deal with it. I'm safe though. I'm sorry I don't know why I made this but I just really really really really really need someone to just chat with

JJLemon18

@IainJammyboy I'm so sorry to hear you feel this way, I know what you mean. Its great that you're still here with us to vent about it, as cliche as it sounds, this shows great strength and the will to continue fighting
I'm here if you want to chat, and I know I'm not the greatest at chatting, but I'm always here if you need. Take lots of care

MatchaMia

@IainJammyboy Hi, I'm sorry that you've been feeling so drained. I'm glad that you made that post and reached out. Thank you for being here, you have so much strength. I'm also here if you need someone to talk with

LydsRose9

Hi @IainJammyboy - please don’t feel like you have to apologise for writing down your feelings and experiences on here. It’s an incredibly brave thing to do and you should be very proud of yourself.

I can really relate to what you’ve written, especially feeling like you don’t want to live but you don’t want to die. Something that always helped me was when I read something that said ‘you don’t have to be looking forward to the future, it’s enough to just be curious about what is to come’. I find that in times when I’m feeling bad, just wondering about how my favourite show will end, or thinking about a dinner I’m looking forward to can encourage me to stick around a bit longer. I know this may not help for everyone but I think it’s good to remember that life doesn’t have to always be about the big stuff, the little day to day things can be just as important.

We are always here for you on the mix. Thank you for opening up and when you want to again, we will be here ready and waiting to hopefully help.🩷