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Anxiety over what feels like nothing
Former Member
Posts: 17 Settling in
I’ve asked for some advice on here before regarding intrusive thoughts. At the beginning of this year, I started struggling with them very badly and very suddenly. It all started over questioning me sexuality, something I feel like I have now come to accept. I have discussed all this with my partner of nearly ten years, and he’s been nothing but supportive and understanding throughout it all. My sexuality doesn’t affect our relationship, just as a side note.
However, with the intrusive thoughts came random bouts of anxiety. I have now gotten really good at being able to bat intrusive thoughts away, being successful in doing it about 90% of the time. Even still, even if I don’t end up having any intrusive thoughts, I am still experiencing random anxiety. I think they started because I was scared of the anticipation of having intrusive thoughts, and now it feels like it’s just my body’s normal reaction to become anxious out of the blue.
I’m trying to make peace with this, but these random anxiety days are really starting to upset me. Having a ball of anxiety to deal with all day over NOTHING is one of the most infuriating things I’ve ever dealt with. Does anyone have any tips on how to deal with it? I’m trying to walk a bit more since I don’t usually leave the house, and it’s helping a bit. A lot of the time I’m trying to distract myself with reading or video games. And I have an e-cig which is literally just chamomile and lavender (no tobacco or anything like that in it) which sometimes helps. Lately though, the anxiety is starting to feel like its getting a bit much again, and I’m not sure what to do. I should also mention that I’m in therapy too, and my therapist is aware of all these issues. I’m 24 and female. Any advice would be much appreciated.
However, with the intrusive thoughts came random bouts of anxiety. I have now gotten really good at being able to bat intrusive thoughts away, being successful in doing it about 90% of the time. Even still, even if I don’t end up having any intrusive thoughts, I am still experiencing random anxiety. I think they started because I was scared of the anticipation of having intrusive thoughts, and now it feels like it’s just my body’s normal reaction to become anxious out of the blue.
I’m trying to make peace with this, but these random anxiety days are really starting to upset me. Having a ball of anxiety to deal with all day over NOTHING is one of the most infuriating things I’ve ever dealt with. Does anyone have any tips on how to deal with it? I’m trying to walk a bit more since I don’t usually leave the house, and it’s helping a bit. A lot of the time I’m trying to distract myself with reading or video games. And I have an e-cig which is literally just chamomile and lavender (no tobacco or anything like that in it) which sometimes helps. Lately though, the anxiety is starting to feel like its getting a bit much again, and I’m not sure what to do. I should also mention that I’m in therapy too, and my therapist is aware of all these issues. I’m 24 and female. Any advice would be much appreciated.
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Something I have found helpful when dealing with anxiety is to distract myself with activities that help control my emotions. You said that you are trying to walk more. Any kind of cardio can be great as a distraction. Put on some music on a jog and it can be very soothing after an especially difficult episode. I’ve never had very serious anxiety as it’s mostly with exams but it always helps me to get back to a calm state of mind so I’m ready to study or work on something.
It’s important to remember you are not alone and when you have these bouts of anxiety you should talk to a trusted friend or your partner as things may appear much worse in that moment but afterwards you realise it wasn’t so bad. So having some people to turn to can help to keep you calm and hopefully distracted to some extent. Please don’t keep these moments to yourself, during the incidents, and be open as comfortably as possible as with those you trust.
You also said that you have a very supportive partner and that is great to hear. Your partner should be your best friend before anything else so be sure to turn to him whenever possible. Remember that this person cares for you and after ten years should not mind being around you so spend time with him, as much as healthily possible, in shared hobbies or maybe introduce him to some of your games?
I also like to play games and read (though it’s mostly non-fiction). I would love to hear what games you are interested in? I might have some tips!
I’m distracting myself as much as possible lately. I’m currently reading The Lunar Chronicles (I’m on the last book) and I’m playing through Persona 5 again. I’ve already completed about three times, and I’ve fully completed Persona 5 Royal which is like an extended version of the game. I got all the trophies for Royal, so I’m trying to get all the trophies for the original too.
My partner is amazing. He works pretty long hours though, so when I see him lately it’s usually after he gets out of work (he can sometimes only get to mine for 12am). So we can’t do an awful lot before his eyelids start closing, haha. Just him making the time to come and see me though means an awful lot. I have nothing but admiration for him. I can’t tell you how many times we’ve introduced each other to our games. I actually got him to play Persona during lockdown and he completed it and loved it. It was a great time tbh.
Thanks so much for your comment, it really means a lot. As for games I love Persona 5 (which I’ve mentioned haha), The Witcher 3, Eternal Sonata (the cheesiest PS3 game known to man), Dragon Age series, Mass Effect series (I’ve recently played through all three of these and loved them), Kingdom Hearts series (although I don’t bother to try concentrating on the plot anymore haha), Life is Strange series and Stardew Valley! 💖
I’ve not had the chance to play many of those games, but I’ll definitely check them out. The Witcher 3 is great, though I’ve never finished it. As for Stardew Valley, I do know a helpful little glitch where you can name things or yourself specific item codes to receive them when they appear in the text boxes in game. I know, I’m absolutely shameless! I checked your profile and it says you like anime. I have to recommend Jojo and Attack On Titan if you haven’t seen them already.
And you like running, that’s fantastic. I only started training properly when this summer holiday started for year 13s, after my last A-level exam. I’m not the best either but I should recommend Nike run club. I use it all the time and you can get fun little achievements and see interesting statistics on how you are doing. It can get very competitive though, especially with my friends! When gyms closed we had to adapt our routines and now we just do everything at home. A lot of them are open now but I’ve got all the equipment I need. Whether it’s a gym workout or running I’ve always found it to be really helpful for anxiety, vibing to some music and particularly motivating to wake up sore the morning after.
I’m very happy to see that I was able to help you out, even if only a little. You could also contact some trusted family or friends if your partner is not available when you have anxiety attacks. It can be very reassuring just to hear a loved one’s voice over the phone. I hope the anxiety is calming down a bit now.