Problems won’t go away and more new problems 😩

_Tech_Addict_Girl

   Hi guys I guess I’m back now I want to put what I said to my counsellor on here and write a few more things.I just wanted  to talk to you about stuff as I feel like new stuff has come up that didn’t bother me before and just some other stuff.
Well first I want talk about what I haven’t spoken to you about before so my dad and mom don’t live together anymore so I used to go to my dads house on the weekend ever since I was little but when I turned 14 I stopped going because when I used to go all everyone did at my dads house was moan at me about stupid stuff so I eventually stopped going to my dads house it’s been two years now. On my birthday my dad contacted me after ages and my cousins to wish me happy birthday but I don’t know why because after all this time is they haven’t even bothered with me. So then I got into a argument with my dad and apparently he saying it’s all my fault I don’t go anymore but if I didn’t get moaned at by especially him I would want to keep going. They did care for me when I was little but now I’m older they hardly care my dad is kind of making me feel back about it that I haven’t seen my bothers and sisters in ages or even anyone in my dads family 🥺that has just really stress me out so I blocked him about 2 days ago and I also feel bad about that too.
The second thing I’m stressed about is that I think I will get the job taken off me because I got asked for my birth certificate and I can’t find it and it’s been over 3 weeks and I really don’t want to loose the job all because of that 😔😰I feel like I’m keeping them waiting 🥺they might think I don’t want the job but I really do and I will be really really upset if I loose it all because of that. 
The third thing I’m stressed about is I’m in a long distance relationship now and I don’t know but me and this boy really got close and I’m constantly worried if I’m good enough for him he said he will never ever leave me but like I think me and him are really attached now and he got his phone taken away today because he got low grades in school so I’m upset that I can’t talk to him tonight and I don’t know when his getting his phone back I never asked him that 😓 So referring to what I said yesterday about the long distance relationship well today I found out some hurtful news he told me that before he got with me he was already with someone and when he told me that I really broke down into tears but he said I don’t want to hurt her so he hurt me instead tho 🥺so he cheated and now he said I have to say goodbye now and just blocked me 😭.
So this is me typing today now so I have just been really really down about more things but there is one thing I’m not going to mention on here because I don’t want to cause anything.
Ok so today I was talking to my sisters on Snapchat because I haven’t spoken to them in like 4 years now or seen them because as you read I don’t go to my dads anymore. So I decided to make a group chat with my two sisters because the rest of my siblings are still babies. 

When I made the group chat my sister wanted to add my cousins and that was ok by me but then I started getting a really bad headache and I still have one now and I told them and one of my cousins and one of my sisters just laughed because I don’t think they understand what I’m going thru but one of my cousins do because she’s got anxiety herself so then I told them I googled it and it said I have a brain tumour or cancer and I was so scared 😱 but when I told them my sister and my cousin laughed and said lol stop being silly and that really annoyed me because I think I got something serious and they are laughing like they wouldn’t like it if they feel that way. 

Then they said well we like to laugh and joke but you don’t know because your staying away from us if you come then you would know.I just think that’s so hurtful.
also my sleep pattern is all over the place I went to bed at 6am yesterday 😔😓
I feel like giving up 
sorry this is long but I had to let it out ❤️🥺

Sneakylilmocha

Hi there, honestly I don't know what to say, but I also want you to know that I'm here and listening.

I'm sorry that I can't relate this much, that must be really sucks after you haven't see your dad and his side of his family more then blamed you for not being there, it's not your fault at all if you're feeling that he's stressing you out. Especially about your birth certificate and your love life, I'm really sorry for what you've been through including what I've listened about your cousins, that must be really hurts a lot when they didn't know what you've been through.

This isn't much, I'm not good at words, but I hope you feel better by letting you know that I'm listening!

Past User

Hey @Emoji246

Well done for reaching out for support It sounds like you've got an awful lot going on for you right now. It can be difficult to talk about what's on our mind so hopefully you felt a little lighter after sharing all you did. My mam always says that a problem shared is a problem halved. 

I'm sorry to hear that your dad is making you feel bad about not going to visit him. It sounds like it was tough to keep going to see dad at the weekends because of people keep moaning at you? I think that's a fair enough reason to stop visiting someone. It sounds exhausting to have to put up with constant moaning and I think that i'd stop going somewhere where i felt uncomfortable too. Please try not to feel too bad about it, you did what was best for your mental health. Have you told dad that this is the reason you decided to stop visiting him?

It sounds like you're really stressing about work and finding your birth certificate. Maybe you could tell your manager that you've lost your birth certificate and you're having a bit of bother finding it?  You could even tell them your worries around losing your job because of it. They'd probably really appreciate your honesty and then won't think you're just putting it off. Hopefully things work out for you there. It's great that you're so passionate about your job

I'm awfully sorry to hear about your boyfriend. Long distance relationships sound really tough and they need both people to put 100% effort in order to work out. It sounds like your boyfriend wasn't ready to put in that effort and that is really, really hurtful. No body should cheat on another person, it just shows disrespect and that lad clearly struggled with being honest to you. It's not your fault and i'm sorry that you're hurting because of him. You deserve better. I'm sure that in time, you'll find someone who is able to be there for you and who is able to be honest with you instead of someone who plays games and blocks you when you're upset.

It's really positive that you decided to make a group chat with your sisters and cousins. How did you feel about being back in touch with them? It's not so positive that they didn't take you serious when you talked about your concerns of google telling you that you have a serious illness. It's probably best not to listen to what google diagnoses you with. It once said i had a brain tumour because i had a nose bleed!  If you're concerned about your health, best take it straight to your GP so that they can support you and find out what's going on. That doesn't excuse your sisters and cousins laughing at you and making fun though. Your feelings and concerns are valid and i sure hope that your head ache starts to go away soon.

Messy sleeping patterns are the worst. Mine was pretty bad not too long ago. I decided to turn my phone off an hour before bed now and it's really helped to not have things to distract me when i'm trying to sleep, do you think you could try that?

I'm sorry that you have so much going on for you right now but it's super positive that you have decided to get it all out here. I hope it helps a little

edit; forgot to add... sending big hugs! 

_Tech_Addict_Girl

@Liam

Thankyou so much for helping Liam and yes I had told my dad why I stopped going and he just keeps blaming everything on me and making me feel bad about the whole thing and then I just had enough and blocked him because I can’t deal with it no more I have already got enough going on.

About the headache and looking up I wasn’t supposed to do that but like I was really scared I didn’t know what to do and my mom always makes me give a reason to go to the doctors and I don’t want to tell her 🥺and yes my cousin and sister shouldn’t have laughed at me about it I know 😓.
The long distance relationship I just keep blaming myself for it and I know I shouldn’t but he just made me really attached to him so quickly and he just does that to me so then after he blocked me my sister had to get hold of him because I was so upset I was crying so much and I just wanted to give up it feels like I have no luck anymore with anything at all.

Yes with my sleeping pattern it’s gone really bad and I just then feel so rubbish when I wake up and I would try what you suggested but I think I’m a bit to addicted to my phone 😞I’m so ashamed of that.

Thanks for helping once again Liam you are such a good friend 🙂

_Tech_Addict_Girl

Also thankful @Sneakylilmocha🙂