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joyajoya Posts: 220 Trailblazer
edited August 2020 in Health & Wellbeing
I've attempted to suicide again; now i have to be hospitalized in a clinical hospital for some days, far from home. I dont wanna live anymore. I hate living. But i want to go to this clinic, i am afraid to hurt people here in my house.... idk, tis so confused. I just wanna end over all of this
everything always goes ^^
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Comments

  • _Tech_Addict_Girl_Tech_Addict_Girl Posts: 1,489 Wise Owl
    @joya We are all here for you <3
  • StephanieStephanie Moderator Posts: 1,083 Wise Owl
    Hey @joya

    Just wanted to pop on to say I am sorry to hear what you are going through. We are all here for you :heart:

    Hopefully you will be able to get some more support at the hospital that you deserve, we all care about you :heart:

                                   "Happiness can be found even in the darkest of times if only one remembers to turn on the light" - Albus Dumbledore 

    "Like when I was down you just had that smile that made me feel like everything's worthwhile. Thinking of the day when you went away, what a life to take, what a bond to break, I'll be missing you"

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  • chubbydumplingchubbydumpling Posts: 487 Listening Ear
    Hi @joya

    I am so sorry that you're experiencing this but happy to hear that you're safe. It must be incredibly scary being far away from home during all this; I hope you're getting the support you need at the clinic. 

    We are all here for you <3 Stay strong 
  • _John_John Posts: 87 Budding Regular
    Super proud of how you got this far in terms of surviving mental health over the past few months. I know some of those thoughts are hurting you as I've experienced that before. But don't worry, time will pass and you can get better with the support from the clinic of course.

    Hope you're okay @joya , I know you can do it :)
    "Appear weak when you are strong, and strong when you are weak."  - Sun Tzu
  • joyajoya Posts: 220 Trailblazer
    Thank you all guys <3 at the end of the week I ended up not staying at the clinic because the treatment would be too expensive and the free treatment was something very horrendous, my parents were afraid to leave me alone in a psychiatric clinic where care was so questionable. I am suffering every day, the crises are being intense and daily, and my parents need to dope me. I hear voices, I see things, I get paranoid and I conspire against my family. I'm living in hell.
    everything always goes ^^
  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,463 Skive's The Limit
    Hey Joya I’m really sorry to hear things got so bad that you think that was the only way out 💔

    I hope you’re keeping safe atm ? <3 we care about you here and here if you want to chat about how things are going for you atm
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
  • Han93Han93 Posts: 309 The Mix Regular
    sending you huge hugs @joya we are all here for you, please keep talking to us if it is helping you!
  • joyajoya Posts: 220 Trailblazer
    Everything its horrible, i keep having crisis. There's anything else to say; the meds aren't that effective so well, fuck me. I need psycotherapy and i will have soon. My parents are tired, and me too. They think God can help but lord, this doesn't works, i dont believe in miracles. But thank you guys. I just keep going, this will pass
    everything always goes ^^
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