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Cahms referral

Need Advice, someone I know child aged 12 got referred, has major issues, cahms have told the mother unless he confirms himself to be seen, or put on waiting list they won’t proceed surely it’s down to his mum making the decision not a boy who suffers badly with sensory processing issues, can’t socialise hides away in room, make that decision without being seen, his mother is ready for nervous breakdown, he doesn’t sleep, 

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    LaineLaine Deactivated Posts: 2,762 Boards Guru
    This all sounds really rough for her! 

    I'm not entirely sure how it works but I assume as he's 12 they have to make sure he wants support and is not being forced to? 

    Sorry to hear he doesn't sleep must be hard! Is he unable to confirm he wants it or doesn't want to?

    Surely there should be some leeway there I would have thought but I know they're just doing what's best for the child 

    Well done for reaching out!

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    It's little, and Broken, but still good. Yeah. Still good." ~ Stitch

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    crazyloucrazylou Posts: 2 Newbie
    Due to the virus situation they had to do a phone call assessment, he doesn’t speak to no one on the phone not even family, they Cant do assessment by phone call and make a decision just because he won’t speak to them, school nurse was out before virus situation he stayed under his bed sheet hiding face, no communication hence the referral, he’s missed full year of school nearly, any wee noise irritates him starts going crazy, can’t sit at peace, extremely agitated, doesn’t go out house not even visiting family, there is learning disability and Aspergers in the family, his aunt etc has it and her kids, if they don’t do proper assessment he’ll be in his 30s like his aunt before diagnosed 
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    SienaSiena Posts: 15,500 Skive's The Limit
    Heyy!

    He does sound like he needs help and now. Had the mother got any further with this? He needs a diagnosis to get the right support.  I wish i could help. But the best thing the mum could do is keep trying to get a proper assessment. Hope they get help. It's so hard to get the support at anytime tbh but espically rn cause of corona
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
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    independent_independent_ Community Champion Posts: 8,617 Legendary Poster
    Hiya @crazylou,

    I’m sorry to hear what you and this child are going through it sounds really difficult. I think it’s really difficult at the moment with this virus for people who struggle to speak on the phone because I guess that to assess him they would need a direct communication with him and not just to speak to his mum about how he is, I guess they’d need to see how he acts themselves and ask him some questions in terms of how he feels.

    It does sound like he and his mother need support and hopefully they can return to face to face appointments etc as soon as possible so he can get that. Do you know if he’d attend a face to face appt or would he refuse to go?

    I wish you all the best I hope it all works out :)
    “Sometimes the people around you won’t understand your journey. They don’t need to, it’s not for them.”
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