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Dealing with grief

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 27 Boards Initiate
in Health & Wellbeing
Just got a call from my mam earlier this evening. Gabby, one of my cats, who had been my best friend since I was a baby, got put to sleep today. Her health hasn't been so good these past couple years since she's so old, however this time her health deteriorated so harshly and rapidly that the kindest thing to do was put her out of her misery.

I knew something like this would happen while I was away at uni. It's the last thing I thought of when I said goodbye to her on the day I left home. But it's still so so painful. I never got to give her a proper final goodbye, and I'll have to wait until I go home at Christmas to hold a funeral for her. I can't stop crying and my urge to self harm is worse during this period of intense grief. I'll love her and miss her forever💔

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,938 Extreme Poster
    Oh hydrangea, I'm so sorry. Of course it's painful :(

    Grief is an awful thing to go through and I can really sense how hard losing Gabby must be. It sounds like she was really precious to you. I understand having those feelings around not having had the chance to give her a proper final goodbye.

    Let yourself feel and take things as easy you need, and we're/I'm here if you need anything. She's lucky to have had such a loving owner x

    Sending lots of hugs <3
  • Former MemberFormer Member Moderator Posts: 1,084 Wise Owl
    Hey hydrangea :heart:

    Just wanted to send you some hugs and let you know that we are here for you :heart:

    Echo'ing what Kathleen has said about grief, letting yourself feel, you don't need to go through this alone, we are here for you :heart:

  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,681 Skive's The Limit
    edited September 18
    Im so sorry to hear @Past User
    Sounds so painful right now. I hope with time things can feel that tiny bit less painful and you can think of all happy things when you think about Gabby

    lots of hugs <3
    Post edited by TheMix on
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
  • AzzimanAzziman Moderator, Community Champion Posts: 2,065 Boards Champion
    edited September 18
    Hey @Past User,

    Sorry for your loss - would like to pass on my condolences. We're here with youx

    Much love <3
    Post edited by TheMix on
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  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 123 The Mix Convert
    So sorry for you loss, I also had my dog Tilly be put to sleep while I was at university. I knew it was the kindest thing for my family to do and that they couldn't wait but it was still so awful to not be able to be there and say goodbye. 
    I still miss her a lot but what helped me was to think about celebrating her life and knowing that she lived a good and happy one. I hope that might also help you to think about and we're here to support you.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 287 The Mix Regular
    edited September 18
    Hi @Past User

    Sorry for your loss, I know how painful and hard it can be when you lose a pet because they often become more like a family member than a pet.

    I hope you are feeling a little better. Blue Cross do a pet bereavement service support which might be of use to you or anyone else going through a similar situation, where you can just talk to someone about it via phone call or email. 
    https://www.bluecross.org.uk/pet-bereavement-and-pet-loss
    Post edited by TheMix on
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