My feelings are a mess please help!

Former Member

Okay so I don't know where to put this SK I thought here would work..
I have been a big mess lately my feelings don't make sense I'm a 17 year old girl and never felt this way and I can't figure out why I feel this way
I met a guy about a month ago and I think that's why I feel the way I am.. Its hard to explain..
I've met a lot of guys but this one know what to say and how to help but I'm afraid if I say anything hell think I'm weird and not want to talk to me again.. I suppose I'm so used to being put down and all I just don't know what to do or how to handle my feelings.
Please help
Anyone?
I'm sorry this is so long

Former Member

Hey @Past User, 

How are you? It sounds like a lot of intense emotions are going on, even more so now that you are going out with a guy. Often when were struggling with mental health issues, were we feel alone, isolated and so forth, we want to cling on to those who gives us the love attention we need and without doubt deserve, and often the fear about loosing that person can feel more traumatic than staying with them. 

 A relationship is too ways, I swear me being strange is the reason my current parthner is still with me, but honestly things are so much more difficult in a relationship when you are a hiding apart of you, if he loved you, he wouldn't mind your perks. Every relationship has them. 

I understand it's difficult learning to truely love and trust someone when you've been let down so much, I wouldn't trust anyone neither, I used to push people away til they were at breaking point to test whether or not they would still be there for me. Which isn't healthy. 

How do you feel about this person Ashleen? 

Keep talking to us, 
Best wishes, 
Aurora

Former Member

Were not dating that's the thing I like him but I haven't told him or anyone else..I've never had a serious relationship with anyone.. But I've never felt the way I do towards a guy.
Every time he sends a message my mood changes.. When I think about talking to him again I can't help but smile.
Why do I feel the way I do towards a guy who may not even like me the same way?

Former Member

I really like him we talk so much.. But we live in different parts of the world... So I just wake curl into a bask never talk to people again and stay id in the ball forever...
I just wish I knew what to do

Former Member

You're having a lot of emotions right now and thats natural, take a deep breath. It sounds like you really like this guy, and that can be a scary thing. Its wonderful that he lifts your mood and makes you smile, have you told him these things? It might help to share those positive mood changes so that he knows how much you like him, this could also be a small first step in telling him how you feel. It may also help you to see his reaction, imagine if he replied saying he also smiles and is happy at the sight of your messages. This could help you feel more confident when it comes to talking to him.

About the long distance, Ive been in a long distance relationship for over 3 years. We are lucky enough that we can visit each other but its such a long drive and costs us a lot of money, yet we made it work. There have been rocky patches but we are still together and happy.

Take things one step at a time so that you can stay calm and remember that he probably has all sorts of feelings towards you and the messages you have shared. How about posting him a letter? its old fashioned but romantic and is a fun thing to do with friends.

 You can get though this, write down how you feel and re-read it, focus the words until you can write how you feel clearly, this can help you talk about whats going on inside your mind. You don't have to share the writing, as long as you feel calmer afterwards then its helpful. 

One last note, I noticed you mentioned you met them a month ago, if you met online please be careful of sending people your details. Sounds like you met in person though and if thats the case, and you trust him, then you can ignore that last sentence.