The poem spot

Sian321

Hey @Distraction, I just wanted to say thank you so much for all the ways you've shared yourself here with us over the years. Your poetry has always felt incredibly moving, and it feels really powerful that going forwards you will always have your words and your skill and ability to express with them.

I wish you the very best going forwards. May you be well and shine.

Take lots of care.

Sian321

@Loz , thank you for sharing your poetry here too.

This line in particular really rang through me - "where do you go when nowhere feels like home?". It captures so poignantly that feeling of homesickness for a place you can't quite pin-point.

How does poetry help and support you, would you say? What it is about writing that you most value?

eylah

a hidden hater.

sitting wondering why hater's hate so much
makes it really hard to tell who you can trust
where strength and fear often collide
a talk with my heart through my mind

why..
when im doing great i feel they're reserved
with hard times they sing i knew it often heard
there are times i swear i feel lies
glimpses of something not right in thier eyes
they say we're cool but it's not what i see
and i often feel they don't even like me

my heart wants to know why i feel like i do but my mind is telling me the hardened truth

because...
unable to stand they will stay by your side
even if it's you they don't really like
those fooling lies hide those eyes
that watch you fall in helpful disguise
even if. you're not really their choice
left with their pride that's plenty annoyed

ok…
i think my heart understands it's about what i do and what i have but strength through struggles
made me who l am

yep...
and that's when hater's hate when they can't be what you can

eylah

dear you.

who cried and thought it'd end

who broke and didn't know you'd mend—

i see you now so full of grace

still breathing in that sacred space.

you didn't fail you didn't fall-

you carried mountains through it all.

you held on tight when none could see

the storms you fought internally.

so thank you for not walking out

for staying through the hurt and doubt.

bc of you i stand today-

still growing in my own brave way.
.

this is my fav one i’ve done.

eylah

hard to Explain

i try to speak but lose my voice
like silence is my only choice.
the words i mean don't match the sound
and no one seems to turn around.
you see the smile i wear all day
but miss the things i do not say.
i wish that someone truly could—
hear quiet pain and call it good.
so here i sit still not quite seen —
wrapped in the space that lies between.
its not that i don't want to show—
its just too hard to let you know.

Loz

Ghosts

The river runs dry, the darkness is in the sun
It’s hard to smile when everything’s coming undone
I hate it here, I really think you’re the one
But when you see my ghosts, I know you will be gone

I’m losing the rhythm, I knew I was faded
And I kind of like the fact that I’m hated
You’re the only person to see me naked
But if you saw everything, would you still want me? Would you fake it?

Because I’m nothing inside but this hurt little girl
And I’m scared you only want me when I’m on top of the world
Do you see what I’ve done? All the tables I turned
The way that I’m proud of the bridges I burned

My face doesn’t show it, I don’t lack the remorse
I just can’t find the purpose in caring anymore
If you saw the state I was in that day on the bathroom floor
Would you still stay here or would you be straight out the door?

They’re always here, they’re always in my presence
They were there when I tried to cut myself to heaven
As the sinner I am, I am damned to this forever
Would you stick around or snap the lines I sever?

I want you here, I don’t want you to watch me decay
If I can’t hold it off, I am scared that you won’t stay
And truthfully I don’t want to live another day
Stuck in the cycle of these push and pull games

The rivers run dry, I feel nothing but the pain
It’s still never full no matter how much it rains
It’s exhausting I’ve never been this drained
But I love you and for you I would go through this all over again

Jayn21

Breathe

Looking through the door the lights are off but everyone is in ,
Moving in slow motion,
Hoping the lights would fool those around them ,
It would seem like there just asleep,
Not scared of what’s hiding in the light .

Breathing once ,
Breathing twice ,
Seeing if that would bring some relief,
There’s no peace when danger is gone ,
If danger was consistent ,
It lingers in your mind,
Breathing three times.

Time goes past ,
People move out ,
People move on ,
That lingering feeling is still futile,
Death may not be upon us ,
But danger feels like it is.

Look left ,
look right,
Everything looks safe,
Breathe once,
Breathe twice ,
It doesn’t feel it ,
Because it isn’t .

Catch ur breath it’s not gone,
Don’t remember,
Continue your now,
Breathe now,
You can breathe now.

Find the control button,
Control the safety,
Press it again,
Try again,
Fail again,
It isn’t working .

The control doesn’t regain the feeling of safety,
Is safety there if you can’t feel it ,
They’re safe ,
Someone is safe ,
You must be safe ,
Your safeness relies on theirs .

eylah

becoming her.

she lives inside my daydreams clear

a version bold and free from fear.

with steady voice and radiant eyes

she never dims she never hides.

she says what hurts and says what's true

she dances just because she wants to.

she wears her joy like second skin-

a queen within without the grin.

and though I'm not quite fully there

I feel her in the way I care.

each step I take each wall I burn-

brings me closer to her return.

shes not far off-she's made of me

and slowly I am setting her free.