Arguments with friends

Former Member

Hi

So i have a couple of close great friends, who are equally fantastic in both very different ways. After June we are all going to different parts of the country and the world. So we have decided to go on holiday for a friends 21st birthday in May.
I am not the most easy person to get along with and talking about money in relation with friends has become stressful.

How can i get over simple things like money and keep focused on the positives of going away with friends?
i feel like i'm causing all of the tension between the 3 of us.

Many Thanks

Turtle

Former Member

What's the specific issue in regard to costs? How to split it? How much to spend?

Former Member

More to do with previous costs not bothered about how to split it. i dont want to get annoyed or frustrated with them they are wonderful people.
I know i am the issue

Former Member

Previous costs? Do you mean how much you and your friends spent on previous trips together? Is there a dispute about whether to spend more or less than you did before? Does someone owe money in regard to a previous trip?

Former Member

Hi just from other trips someone i believe owes me a small amount of money but they are saying they dont. i Just tend to focus on small details, even when they dont really matter. I just dont want to overly focus on the small things and ruin the trip and my friendships.

Former Member

Is the money that you're owed by this person a one-off, or has (s)he borrowed from you and not repaid you on other occasions as well?

Former Member

Just tend to hyperfocus on an issue and it can ruin the relationships i form with people.
It was an accumulation issue. But i have let it slide because it's not worth it . I am not sure how to not focus to much on small issues such as money etc. I really don't want to ruin the trip.

Former Member

Do you all like doing the same things? Do you all want to go to the same places? All three of you should talk together about the details of the holiday before you book it: when to go, what to do when you're there, how much it will cost etc. That should prevent disagreements and difficulties when you're away. Google Maps shows routes, distances etc. If you're going a long distance, it's worth finding out about the climate - Wikipedia has climate charts on many of its articles about cities, towns etc.

Have you been on holiday with them before?

Former Member

We have a place to go going to the countryside
The details do stress me so i could definitely do with that . Something to suggest to them
I really don't want to mess this up and no so haven't been on holiday with them before

Former Member

If you plan things in advance, it's less likely that they'll be problems. Work out how you're going to get there, how long it will take, when to leave etc. Write out a list of things to take with you, so that you don't forget anything. Charge your phones, take food and drink.

Depending on how remote the location you're going to is, there might not be many facilities there. For example, in some rural areas, you can be miles away from a cashpoint, petrol station or supermarket.

Have you ever been on holiday with other friends?