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Strange But Sweet...
Former Member
Posts: 1,875,648 The Mix Honorary Guru
This is so random and does have a chessy side to it too but....
So, today I went into a chip shop near to where I work and the same guy who always serves me served me again. This time he was flirting with me and giving me lovely compliments and then gave me his number, written on a napkin. I felt like I wasn't there and was in a dream and then felt that my head was in a daze and as if I didn't know what was going on! But then, after I'd left, it hit me and made me feel confused. I mean, it was so strange and so sweet.
I have his number on the napkin and did text him..We're having a general chit chat conversation now which is nice but not quite sure how I feel or whether I've done the wrong thing or something. Guess I'm looking for some support, advice or reassurance on this, sorry
Thanks in advance x
So, today I went into a chip shop near to where I work and the same guy who always serves me served me again. This time he was flirting with me and giving me lovely compliments and then gave me his number, written on a napkin. I felt like I wasn't there and was in a dream and then felt that my head was in a daze and as if I didn't know what was going on! But then, after I'd left, it hit me and made me feel confused. I mean, it was so strange and so sweet.
I have his number on the napkin and did text him..We're having a general chit chat conversation now which is nice but not quite sure how I feel or whether I've done the wrong thing or something. Guess I'm looking for some support, advice or reassurance on this, sorry
Thanks in advance x
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Comments
Thanks for the reply!
I don't know what I want to do about this but did text him and we've been talking ever since. He's really sweet and lovely, 20 and actually from Romania (I am 19).
I'm not sure as such what makes me feel I have done the wrong thing, I guess its just one of those things. Is this okay?
Hannah x
I find it quite normal to feel a bit strange about things like that. I never really know if I had made the right decision when it comes to guys.
Do you feel like you're not sure if it was the right thing to do? Or do you think your feelings are because of something else?
It sounds like he's a nice guy and you're enjoying chatting to him
No, no. I must change that on my profile as that is old news and long gone, I am not like that anymore or in that current phase, if that makes sense?
Feeling flattered but confused :S x
hey,
It's just a completely new experience for me and I am not used to this and feel that is what could be making me feel more confused about it too. I'm confused as it sill feels strange but so flattering and sweet at the moment, you know?
Hannah
I think with any new experience you tend to feel your way through it, so it's totally understandable to feel a little confused or unsure of how to proceed with it. But like Sam said, it sounds like you're enjoying it so there's no need for you to feel bad or like you've done something wrong.
As long as everything's above board and he's treating you well then there likely isn't any harm in just letting yourself go with it if that's what you want. Try not to put too much pressure on yourself to get things 'right' - take things as they come, so to speak.
Feel free to keep us posted on how things go. :d
Hey Mike,
I am enjoying it and finding it really sweet and flattering but guess I kind of feel as though I am doing something wrong, though I can't seem to explain exactly what I mean by this?
I have agreed to his request of walking with me to my workplace tomorrow..
Hannah x
Hi again Steve,
Well, my life is really controlled and suffocating so more or less all of this experience is new to me. Even being given a guy's number and compliments said to me in the middle of a shop is so new, so it feels strange and confusing in that sense but I do feel as though I am enjoying it as it's so sweet and so flattering.
I think I do fancy him, in a way yes! He told me yesterday that he's liked me since the first time he served me in that shop...4 months ago! But that he only had the courage to pass his number on to me on Friday. Tomorrow, I have agreed to his request of walking some of the way with me to workplace. I guess I only agreed mostly as it's a public and very busy route so so many people are around!
Hannah x
It feels strange and confusing as it's a completely new experience for me, has never happened before and guess it felt kind of surreal. We've been talking and on MOnday morning he actually walked some of the way to my workplace with me..And we kissed...:/ :S
Hannah
I tried to reply sooner but unfortunately my internet access has been very minimal
I am meeting up with him at his house on November 13th.,....
We have to wait as that Sunday 13th is the day where we're both free and not working.
I am telling a story to my family to be able to meet up with him at his house though. Am I wrong for this?:S
Hannah x
Sometimes doing things out of the ordinary turn out to be the best things! Getting compliments can feel strange so I understand exactly where you are coming from but remember as long as you're happy and having fun chatting to him then you have done nothing wrong.:)
Going round to his house is perfectly fine as long as you feel comfortable. Is there a reason why you have told your family a different story?
I feel the need to tell a story as, although I am 19 (20 in January), my life is kind of suffocating, controlling and restricting.
They'd be angry with me if they found out.
It is my first time in an experience like this....x
Hey, thanks for replying.
It feels wrong as I feel as though I'm lying to family, despite being almost 2 years passed the age of actually doing so much, legally. If this makes sense? My lifestyle is restricting, controlling and suffocating and I feel it'd cause problems if they found out.
Hannah
You say you feel it would cause problems if your parents found out you had gone round to his house, in this case do you have a friend or sibling you can trust? It's always nice to have at least someone knowing what you're really up to.
I am the oldest sibling of 6, soon to be 7, so do not feel I can tell either of them due to this.
Someone (a colleague who's also a friend) does know that I'm going to his house on Sunday but not about what we're going to do....x
Hey,
Thank you SO much for your support with this, much appreciated!
He lives with his sister. I do not think that she, or anyone else, will be there when I meet him at his house.
We have discussed having sex...It's scary as it's a totally new experience for me, more or less altogether, however it does bring some happiness and excitement too, the nervous kind though.
I feel that, with my parents, it is a variety of things.
Hannah
Brilliant Hannah, its always nice to have someone knowing where you are just in case so telling your friend was a good move:). I wouldn't worry about not telling them what you're going to do, it's ok to keep some things personal as long as you feel comfortable and happy:d
Hey, I feel mostly comfortable and happy but also scared and excited, if this makes sense?
I have told her where I am going to be on the safe side and know that somebody knows, rather than nobody at all, if that makes sense? I cannot tell her what we'll be doing at his house as I guess I feel that's too much information for her.
Let's just say, this is the furthest I've gone with a guy and so it continues to be a new experience for me. Well, he has told me that he doesn't want to wear a condom as he wants to get right inside me properly and cum too (sorry if too much info
Hannah
I just want to check in and reiterate what Steve has said here about the contraception thing.
You've said that he does not want to wear a condom, but remember that a condom is the only way to protect against sexually transmitted infections (as well as pregnancy). You may want to think about both having sti checks in advance so you both know you're clean and not going to get any nasty surprises. Are you on the pill or anything to protect against pregnancy?
Also, I just want to say one final thing : make sure you're happy with the situation and agree with him in advance that if you want or need him to stop, he will do so. Having sex with someone is about both parties, and both sides are just as important.
Have fun otherwise
Hey,
You say you feel scared and excited. This is completely normal when doing anything you've never done before. For example have you ever started a new job before? I know I have and I felt so excited to start but nervous for my first day.
Remember your position is completely normal and having sex for the first time can be nerve wracking. I have read that you are not using a condom, How do you feel about this? Is this his decision, yours, or both of you together? Protection is important and I would consider thinking about this if you have not:).
Otherwise Hannah I hope you have fun, you seem to really like this guy and I am happy for you:d
Best,
LC_
Thank You so much for your words of advice and support--It means an awful lot to me!
So, it's the night before I lose my virginity to my friend. I am feeling VERY excited but also VERY apprehensive and anxious. Perhaps because this is a total new experience for me, as well as the fact that I'm 'lying' to tell my parents-I've told them I'm meeting up with a few ex college friends (from my first year in college) and going shopping when in fact, I;m going round to my friend's house....
He doesn't want to wear a condom-Is this bad?
I have no protection either, so is this bad too?
xx
Most importantly though, make sure that you feel comfortable with all of this. If you feel pressured or unhappy, it may be a good idea to have more time to think things through.
I just want to reiterate what Maisy said, without a condom you have a high chance of getting pregnant and without asking for an STI check you have no way of knowing what you might be contracting, many STIs have no outward signs and often people don't even know that they have them. I would suggest that you buy a box of condoms before you meet with him tomorrow, that way, at least if you have them with you then you have the option of using them if you change your mind about doing it without.
As for the lying to your parents thing, you're definitely not alone. I don't think anyone in the world would tell their parents that they're away to go have sex.
I am glad that you're exited and it's ok to feel nervous, I think everyone is before their first time. But again, like Maisy said, the important thing is that you are happy with all of this and are doing it because you want to.
It's not bad if you want to get pregnant and get an STI.
Protection is crucial, why doesn't he want to wear a condom?
Hey Hannah,
I know I have mentioned this already but I think using protection is a good idea, at least you know that way you're having fun and you are safe.
You have said previously that he doesn't want to wear a condom. Are you ok with this? Personally, like the others said I would take condoms with you just in case you change your mind. Remember wearing a condom is normal and lots of people do it so don't feel embaressed about asking him to use one.
So, I lost my virginity to this guy today.............
Hannah
Hannah, overall there is a sense that you might want to share more with The Mix - but it's best for you to lead on what that information or question might be.