What life changes are difficult in a new relationship?

Former Member

Getting into a relationship always means making changes to our lives. Maybe it's getting into a sexual relationship. Or staying at someone's house, in their bed. Or getting to know their friends and family.

And sometimes external things change that mean we have to change our relationship. Maybe one of you moves away and you find yourself in a long distance relationship. Or gets a new job, or starts studying somewhere new.

What changes have you made in a new relationship? Which ones were difficult? What changes would worry you or put you off getting more involved with someone?

Former Member

More simply - what's the biggest change you've had to make or get used to in a new relationship?

Former Member

I had to adapt to a long distance relationship within a few weeks of a new relationship - but that relationship lasted years after so only made us stronger - i think perhaps adapting to change very early on can work well, as you don't know anything else, so you adapt and go with it. Maybe it's harder when you're used to something or living a certain way and then something changes ??

Once I also had hope for a potential new relationship with a guy i liked when his mum unfortunately passed away…really hard time for him with everything he was going through, and as it was so early on we eventually just drifted apart :no:

Former Member

What I found most difficult at first was simply staying over at my ex boyfriends house. I have ocd and my night time routine is probably the most important one that I have to do but I couldn't because I was at his house so even getting to sleep was really difficult - anxiety literally goes sky high when I don't complete a routine. Not really too long into the relationship, I moved in with him. I was excited to of course but then reality hit and it was a huge change in my life. I'm awful with even the smallest amount of change (like the new IPlayer layout!) - so living somewhere else was crazy. Following on from that, it was getting used to the new life routine that came with moving in with an older man who already had two kids. I think that whole experience has made me a lot more wary about how I'd go about such huge life changes in future relationships.

Former Member

butterfly123 wrote: »

What I found most difficult at first was simply staying over at my ex boyfriends house. I have ocd and my night time routine is probably the most important one that I have to do but I couldn't because I was at his house so even getting to sleep was really difficult - anxiety literally goes sky high when I don't complete a routine. Not really too long into the relationship, I moved in with him. I was excited to of course but then reality hit and it was a huge change in my life. I'm awful with even the smallest amount of change (like the new IPlayer layout!) - so living somewhere else was crazy. Following on from that, it was getting used to the new life routine that came with moving in with an older man who already had two kids. I think that whole experience has made me a lot more wary about how I'd go about such huge life changes in future relationships.

Moving in with someone is a massive change. I think it's pretty common for it to shake things up emotionally, sometimes in ways that you can't plan for. How do you think you'd do things differently in the future to make that change easier? Or do you have any advice for someone else thinking of moving in with a partner?