Jordan from Switchboard will be here Wednesday and Thursday this week to answer your questions on anything to do with sexuality and relationships - leave your questions over on this thread
Head over to this thread to submit a song for our February 'Love' playlist that we'll be putting on Spotify!

funerals

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
is it respectful to 'look good' at a funeral?

i mean, wear nice make up and do your hair nicely, as if you were going to a birthday meal or something maybe?

or do you think that you should really go with minimalistic make up, a 'normal' up/down hair do, plain black trousers and a plain black jacket covering a plain black top with some plain black shoes?

im not trying to say i want to go tarted up or anything, but i havent a clue what to wear. do i make an effort to look nice, or do i put on a smart black suit and just hope for the best?

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I always go dressed nice and with make up. I think you should wear what makes you feel comfortable :yes: that doesnt mean you have to wear black either ?:)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    yeh but knowing my nan id be scorned all day, and probably for the rest of my life if i didnt wear black. its my aunty's funeral, she only died this morning but you have to think about these things, anyway it takes my mind off the fact that she did actually die.
    i dont know what to do. i always get looked upon as the rebel of the family (which is technically untrue) and my nan hardly holds me in the high regards of her standards. i just dont want to let anyone down, especially my aunty, on such a sad day. i hate making decisions
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I'd wear Dark clothes - doesn't have to be black. But you'd stand out from the crowd more if you wore something too colourful!!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    i never wear make up to funerals, i just think its a bit respectful to not be 'on the pull' at a relations wake! ;)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    but i wouldn't look like i was 'on the pull anyway', and i am in a long standing relationship with my baby's daddy! its not like id look like a slut or anything, it would be very plain makeup - maybe just eyeliner and mascara. i wouldnt go with the old blue eyeshadow red lipstick thing
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by BritJames
    *hugs* I'm sorry to hear about your Aunty.

    thank you
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I would wear what you think your auntie would have wanted you to wear.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by badabing
    but i wouldn't look like i was 'on the pull anyway', and i am in a long standing relationship with my baby's daddy! its not like id look like a slut or anything, it would be very plain makeup - maybe just eyeliner and mascara. i wouldnt go with the old blue eyeshadow red lipstick thing

    i know you wouldnt be on the pull! just usualy when theres a lot of old people around they look down on it (i know lol!) thats why i started wearing no make up at all, couldnt stand all the bitchy old biddys ruining someones funeral with their shite!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    thats another thing whilst im on the topic -

    do you think its something my partner should come to? he only met her once. if he comes then thats lovely and he'll be there for me, although i dont think my nan would be too happy about it. and if he doesnt come then it means i dont have to take Jazmyn with me but i'll be on my own, apart from my mum and that lot obviously, i just mean i wont have his support next to me
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by badabing
    it would be very plain makeup - maybe just eyeliner and mascara. i wouldnt go with the old blue eyeshadow red lipstick thing

    No, wearing make-up like that is perfect. You'd look smart, like you'd made an effort, and you hadn't gone overboard.
    Tbh, if it was me who had a Nan to impress, then just for one day I'd wear black. Everyones happy, and theres no bitching about who doesnt look presentable or what-not.

    You've got your head screwed on Badabing, whatever you choose to wear, you'll look fine.

    *hugs* about the news in general hun...
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Wear dark clothes, but they don't have to be black. If you normally wear make up then there's nothing wrong with it. If not maybe just a subtle amoun if you want to look smart...no one can complain at you making an effort as a sign of respect now can they.

    As for your b/f going, I don't see that it would be a problem...ask your mum what she thinks, she's bound to know how the fmaily will react to it better than we can.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I never wear make up at a funeral, cos I get so upset and start rubbing my eyes and it looks a mess.
    Even if im not close to someone I still get upset at funerals :(

    I also just tend to dress smart, does not have to be black. Sometimes people request NO BLACK anyway.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I wore a black trouser suit with a white shirt underneath for my nanas funeral. I wore makeup too because thats my normal look. I looked smart. Make sure your mascara is waterproof. Id say only take james with you if you want him to be there. Jon came with me to my nanas funeral, in fact he was a pallbearer, even though hed only met her a few times, but I wouldnt take Jazmyn if I were you. If you cant get anyone else to look after her, then get james to.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    i dont want to take jazmyn, i dont think it will benefit anyone and if its not necessary, i dont think its nice for a two year old to be at a funeral.
    oh i dont know, im not particualrly in the mood now - i just spent an hour and a half talking to my tutor about anything and everything. i feel a bit better, but i still feel like theres lots of stuff to deal with in general/. talk soon x
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by badabing
    thats another thing whilst im on the topic -

    do you think its something my partner should come to? he only met her once. if he comes then thats lovely and he'll be there for me, although i dont think my nan would be too happy about it. and if he doesnt come then it means i dont have to take Jazmyn with me but i'll be on my own, apart from my mum and that lot obviously, i just mean i wont have his support next to me

    firstly sorry for your loss!
    if you need his support then have him come with you see if someone can look after jazmyn.
    as for what to wear what you are comfortable in as long as you are smart. wear make up as long as its not ott but you dont seem to be the type of gal to do that at a funeral. dont worry about it too much. the most important thing is that you are there and showing respect for your auntie x
  • SkiveSkive No discipline. No morality. No respect. New ForestPosts: 15,067 I eat threads for breakfast
    There's no rule to how you should dress to a funeral - you shuld do what you think!!!

    Me and my mates used to joke that if any of us died we'd want everyone to wear bright topical shirts and shit. As it happens in the last year three of my mates have died but when it came to it we still got suited an booted for the funerals (Some wore trainers tho) and we didn't think the famillies would be too impressed if we turned up in bright colours.

    At the end of the day all we wanted to make an effort - dress properly, sing loud, and get thouroughly pissed up afterwards. The most important thing is that you turned up!!

    I don't think make ups a problem at all.
Sign In or Register to comment.