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so confused!

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
i was with a guy for quite a long time and even though it was tough being in a long distance relationship i had the best time when i was with him. now we split up about a month ago because he was having finacial problems and couldn't afford to keep coming down to see me and so we decided to call it a day but remain friends.

since then we still speak on the phone and neither of us has been interested in anyone else, the problem is i still love him, and when we were talking he said that he loves me 2. BUT he also says that he's not ready for a relationship and so we should remain friends but how can u just be mates with someone when u are madly in love with them and u know that they feel the same?? im scared that in time he will meet someone else and so i am desperate to get in a relationship with him, i even feel guilty when i look at other men! we are really screwed up and i need to get something sorted. any suggestions?:confused:

:heart: lisa :wave:

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    This is indeed a bit strange ... first you break up 'cause he can't come down ta see ya anymore but ya still love eachother? If he really loved you, I think he would have found a way to meet with you, despite his financial probs.

    I'd say, try to let him go. Try not to call him as much as you do now. You two have already tried and split up. Don't feel bad 'bout looking at other men, I have a bf and I still look at other men, but that's all :) You've got to go out with ya friends, don't think 'bout him too much, try to meet other people.

    In time, you will get over him.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Re: so confused!
    Originally posted by its-playtime
    BUT he also says that he's not ready for a relationship and so we should remain friends
    I think this is the main thing here - it'd never work for as long as he feels like this.
    He wants to enjoy being young and single and I know it's hard for you but I'm afraid there's nothing else you can do other than let him go.

    Good luck :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    If he was commited the rel would have made it through financial troubles and all. Albeit you not seeing each other much once a month or less, but it would have survived. Unrequitted love is a hard thing to come to terms with, trust me I've been there, but I promise you will find someone who's worth you and that you will love far more than this guy. It might be the next person you meet or it might be a few years down the line but they will come along.

    But stay friends, if you can handle that. It will be hard when someone else comes along for him, but if you can cope you never know how the future will work.

    How old are you both just out of interest? I know I'm being lazy not checking your profile but my connections really slow tonight. sorry.

    Sorry I cna't be more positive for you but in the long run you've got to give it time ad space and see how everything turns out. Just remember this has happened for a reason and although it may not be clear now in the future it will be. :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by Arianne
    This is indeed a bit strange ... first you break up 'cause he can't come down ta see ya anymore but ya still love eachother? If he really loved you, I think he would have found a way to meet with you, despite his financial probs.

    i think this is so very true, if i was in his situation i would have found money to see you even if it wasnt alot of time together it still shows he would do anything for you. i would do it for my g/f. im 20 and arent in money troubles but i still would find a way to see her.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    how old are you both?

    im 22 and he is 24.

    :heart: lisa :wave:
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