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Neighbour thinks he makes all the rules

_Tech_Addict_Girl_Tech_Addict_Girl Posts: 1,489 Wise Owl
edited June 2021 in Health & Wellbeing
Hi guys so I just want to talk about stuff that as been bothering me but each thing will be in a different post so this one is about my neighbour.

My neighbour has been coming to my house for a long time till 2019.

The thing is he is a family friend also but he comes to the house everyday till in the morning and goes home at 10pm what bothers me is he always thinks he can make all the rules when he was just really a neighbour. He always insults me and takes them to far.

He tries to be all the goodie two shoes in front of my mom and buy me stuff so my mom will then like him more then a friend because that’s what his trying to do because he likes my mom more then a friend but my mom don’t like him the same way. He makes insults that aren’t funny but are to him. He never insults my brother and I feel like that isn’t very fair.

He has to go everywhere my mom goes for example If my mom goes shopping he has to go with her without fail. I think his got way to comfortable if you know what I mean.

If I do something good for example today I did some chores to get pocket money off my mom because I got this go Henry bank card that I can use everytime I do some chores my mom puts money in their My mom and him was outside looking at the new car while they was doing that I did some chores when they come back in I said to my mom I did the chores you wanted me to do then my mom said it was already full the dog bowl and I said it wasn’t I just done it.

Then my neighbour butted in and said you can’t just fill the dog bowl if it was already full to get money but I wasn’t it seems if I do something good he tries to say I didn’t do it and carries on moaning about it and that makes me angry and then I start too he just thinks he rules everything.

I did tell the the teacher before in year 11 while we was in lockdown I emailed her and said I don’t want my neighbour coming everyday to my house especially with the virus also the safeguarding teacher was on the phone too well they was both safeguarding teachers but one of them was also a deputy head and an English teacher.

They both said you have a right to do what’s best for you and what makes you feel the safe because of the virus because I also have health anxiety too so that was another reason to it too.

So they said why don’t you talk to your mom about your neighbour and say you don’t want him coming everyday and they said it that doesn’t work we will talk to her.

But I spoke to her about it and she made me feel guilty about it because he helps her with alot she said you will have to tell him don’t come then because I’m not so she put it all on me.

So then I had an update of them and they said how did it go and I said ok and they said is he still coming and I said don’t worry it’s ok so my mom made me feel guilty so I didn’t do anything 😩

mod edit: moved to health & wellbeing on request, line breaks added for readability :)
Post edited by JustV on

Comments

  • _Tech_Addict_Girl_Tech_Addict_Girl Posts: 1,489 Wise Owl
    I was meant to put it health and well-being feel free to move it there if you want ❤️
  • naominaomi Posts: 94 Budding Regular
    @_Tech_Addict_Girl, I am sorry that you are in this situation and it seems that you feel trapped in this situation because your mom has put the responsibility on you to ask the neighbour to stop coming round. I can sense that it is tough for you especially because you don't have the best relationship with him. Can I ask, have you talked to your brother about this? He may not like your neighbour coming around either and if he doesn't, he may back you up on this and will help you talk with your neighbour and come from a united front. He absolutely has crossed the boundaries with you and I think if anything if you do end up speaking with him, you should let him know this because I think he has become too comfortable being a presence in your household, which may be why he doesn't see that you aren't comfortable with him coming round while we are in the midst of a pandemic. If you do talk to him also, go with someone so that you aren't alone.
    I hope this situation is resolved soon and this won't be something you'll have to continue to deal with this for much longer. I am sending you love and lots of hugs <3
    (PS I tried to move your post but I don't think I did it correctly :s I am sorry I am still new to this :'( )
  • _Tech_Addict_Girl_Tech_Addict_Girl Posts: 1,489 Wise Owl
    Hi @naomi i hope you are ok and Thankyou for your reply❤️.
    Yes I mean it is very frustrating putting all the responsibilities on me the thing is said about telling my brother I would do that but I think it’s a bit to risky because him and my brother are close they are like best friends and he don’t mind that he comes to the house everyday because he doesn’t live here anymore he lives with his girlfriend. Him and my brother tell each other everything and back each other up so his close to him so he don’t mind.
    But I need to do something about it because it’s annoying me. For now I’m just pretending to like him so it’s less stress on me like I’m not making it obvious that I don’t like him as they say like I’m just being civil with him.
    Don’t worry about not being able to move the post because I think only the moderators can do that also welcome to the mix I think I spoke to you before but welcome again big hugs to you too 🤗I hope you like it here❤️
  • naominaomi Posts: 94 Budding Regular
    Hey @_Tech_Addict_Girl I am doing well and thank you for welcoming me again to the mix, I enjoy spending time here. :3
    I think right now being civil is a good idea until you figure out a game plan to do something because you shouldn't be feeling constantly annoyed when you're at home, and I think being civil would create less waves that would give him more reason to be rude to you. It's a shame that you can't go to your brother but I still think that if you are to address him directly, to do it with someone so you have someone on your side to support you maybe a friend who has been there while he has been there annoying you or being rude towards you. Hopefully there will be someone who sees your side or even that your mom would be able to see your side of things with time.
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