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[OLD] The 'I need a hug' thread - please read first post before posting :)

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    GreenTeaGreenTea Posts: 12,938 Born on Earth, Raised by The Mix
    independent_ said:
    I hear you @GreenTea, life can get sooo busy and it’s hard when you’re feeling like you have no time to just stop.

    Am I right in thinking that you mentioned you had no medication, when are you getting your prescription? Hopefully it isn’t too long. 


    12th January. I had to order for delivery because I was isolating but came back negative so back at work. But it's expected by posts on the 12th. So fucking far away
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    ZenZen Posts: 1,989 Extreme Poster
    @GreenTea if you call your GP they'll be able to give you a weeks prescription to pick up from the chemist 
    Alis propriis volat 
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    independent_independent_ Community Champion Posts: 8,615 Legendary Poster
    Oh my goodness @GreenTea that is ages away when it comes to meds, could you ring your GP or 111 to see about getting any sooner? I think stopping suddenly can really affect you and make things really really difficult <3 
    “Sometimes the people around you won’t understand your journey. They don’t need to, it’s not for them.”
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    GreenTeaGreenTea Posts: 12,938 Born on Earth, Raised by The Mix
    Eleanor said:
    @GreenTea if you call your GP they'll be able to give you a weeks prescription to pick up from the chemist 


    Ahhh I tried that and the receptionist said I had to wait for my meds delivery 
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    ZenZen Posts: 1,989 Extreme Poster
    @GreenTea did you tell you you had ran out? Because they're not allowed to just leave you cold turkey 
    Alis propriis volat 
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    GreenTeaGreenTea Posts: 12,938 Born on Earth, Raised by The Mix
    Eleanor said:
    @GreenTea did you tell you you had ran out? Because they're not allowed to just leave you cold turkey 

    Yep.

    These receptionist are so just not great. Had so many issues with them before. Like they once wouldn't let me book an appointment because "mental health isn't treated here" and they are just so blunt and cold on the phones
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    LaineLaine Deactivated Posts: 2,762 Boards Guru
    You cna normally go through the chemist as well without consulting the gp. 111 can refer :) 

    Wanted to offer hugs to everyone! And a remember that you can still access support, via here https://www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-team
    And SHOUT, Samaritans, Childline etc 
    You're worth it ❤️

    🌈Positive thoughts🌈

    "This is my family. I found it, all on my own.
    It's little, and Broken, but still good. Yeah. Still good." ~ Stitch

    "Lately, I've been struggling with all the simple things in my life" ~ Cian Ducrot

    "I don't know if it's because my heart hurts or I'm insecure" ~ Juice Wrld
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    GreenTeaGreenTea Posts: 12,938 Born on Earth, Raised by The Mix
    I might pop into boots Tomorrow and ask them. Should say on their system the situation anyway so maybe they can sort me out. 
    Thank you all
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    SienaSiena Posts: 15,495 Skive's The Limit
    edited January 2021
    Ah ffs I feel sick now and I have no idea why. My stomach feels dodgy and feels like there is something in my throat

    i think my own self harm is making me feel sick when looking at it


    Post edited by Siena on
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
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    SienaSiena Posts: 15,495 Skive's The Limit
    edited January 2021
    Telling my “boyfriend” I self harmed and he said “oh” told him he could more supportive than that and he said you tell me what to say. He suggested me to drink instead and a different  self harm  then told me to fuck off. 


    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
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    Past UserPast User Posts: 1,997 Extreme Poster
    Ah @Shaunie. That's not okay pal. I'm sorry he reacted like that.

    I've popped some alternatives to self harm in a spoiler below

    Sending hugs again bud. We're here for you <3
    Snapping an elastic band on your wrist
    Put your hands into a sink of cold water
    Wrap ice in a towel and put it onto your skin ( be careful with this one)
    Take a hot shower and use a good exfoliating body wash and a sponge or glove and scrub!
    Exercise - Sit ups etc
    Punching a punch bag or pillow
    Popping bubble wrap
    Popping balloons
    Playing with a stress ball/fidget cube
    Calling a helpline Samaritans or text SHOUT
    Reach out on here or to friends/ family.. even just for a chat
    Try to distract yourself with a movie
    Listen to calming music
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    LaineLaine Deactivated Posts: 2,762 Boards Guru
    edited January 2021
    I feel shite tonight lool just wanted to sleep it away but it's hard to fall asleep

    🌈Positive thoughts🌈

    "This is my family. I found it, all on my own.
    It's little, and Broken, but still good. Yeah. Still good." ~ Stitch

    "Lately, I've been struggling with all the simple things in my life" ~ Cian Ducrot

    "I don't know if it's because my heart hurts or I'm insecure" ~ Juice Wrld
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    independent_independent_ Community Champion Posts: 8,615 Legendary Poster
    Hey @Laine I’m sorry to hear you’re not feeling good <3 here if you need to chat about anything. I hope tomorrow is a better day for you.
    “Sometimes the people around you won’t understand your journey. They don’t need to, it’s not for them.”
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    SienaSiena Posts: 15,495 Skive's The Limit
    Well I just broke up with my boyfriend
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
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    LaineLaine Deactivated Posts: 2,762 Boards Guru
    Thanks @independent_ ! same here <3

    Ah no @Shaunie all the hugs! 

    🌈Positive thoughts🌈

    "This is my family. I found it, all on my own.
    It's little, and Broken, but still good. Yeah. Still good." ~ Stitch

    "Lately, I've been struggling with all the simple things in my life" ~ Cian Ducrot

    "I don't know if it's because my heart hurts or I'm insecure" ~ Juice Wrld
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    SciFi_456SciFi_456 Posts: 131 The Mix Convert
    @ I'm sorry to hear that @Shaunie we're all here for you 👍🏻
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    SienaSiena Posts: 15,495 Skive's The Limit
    Thanks guys. I’ll get over it I guess. He seemed to be having a go at me because I was giving myself more scars and I think he got angry cause he would be ashamed to be with me. So I just ended it. And he said good luck with life. I hate it when people say good luck with life. It’s feels like they’re just gone/disappeared 
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
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    GreenTeaGreenTea Posts: 12,938 Born on Earth, Raised by The Mix
    One of my jobs have fucked me over financially big time
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    Millie2787Millie2787 Community Champion Posts: 5,146 Part of The Furniture
    Got my PIp assessment date and it’s over the phone and I’m terrified, does anyone know if I can have someone with me to explain anything if I don’t understand? I’m anxious on what there ask or say or if I don’t understand anything there get frustrated 
    Sometimes all you need is one person to believe in you , for you to begin to believe in yourself.
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    GreenTeaGreenTea Posts: 12,938 Born on Earth, Raised by The Mix
    Handing in my notice. Fuck it. 
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    independent_independent_ Community Champion Posts: 8,615 Legendary Poster
    Millie2787 said:
    Got my PIp assessment date and it’s over the phone and I’m terrified, does anyone know if I can have someone with me to explain anything if I don’t understand? I’m anxious on what there ask or say or if I don’t understand anything there get frustrated 
    I think so @Millie2787 I’m pretty sure I read when I was claiming PIP that you can have someone with you, and it can be anyone who is over 16 so someone you’re comfortable with <3 I’ve been there I understand how stressful it is. 
    “Sometimes the people around you won’t understand your journey. They don’t need to, it’s not for them.”
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    LaineLaine Deactivated Posts: 2,762 Boards Guru
    Yeah pretty sure you can have someone with you! I went with my friend :)

    🌈Positive thoughts🌈

    "This is my family. I found it, all on my own.
    It's little, and Broken, but still good. Yeah. Still good." ~ Stitch

    "Lately, I've been struggling with all the simple things in my life" ~ Cian Ducrot

    "I don't know if it's because my heart hurts or I'm insecure" ~ Juice Wrld
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    Salix_alba_2019Salix_alba_2019 Deactivated Posts: 1,646 Extreme Poster
    @Shaunie I'm proud of you for doing the right thing because you deserve so much better.

    We'll done for standing up for yourself❤️ Your feelings are 100% warranted and the fact that you've been able to keep your composure not only in general, especially in moments where it could have been very easy for things to have a different outcome . I've seen how well you've handled being on the receiving end of unkindness and every single time you have shown yourself to be exemplary. 

    Setting boundaries such is a great place to start, especially in relationships because it teaches people what you will and won't tolerate. It just stops people from taking the absolute piss or treating you like garbage. You don't deserve to be anyone's scapegoat or outlet just because they're having a bad day it doesn't excuse people's continously hurtful behaviour.  You're definitely not exaggerating, not in the slightest bit trust me. 

    If you text him I'm gonna confiscate your phone lol. For real though shaunie, unless there's acountability and changed behaviour stay away from this dude, you're no one's punching bag x
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    SienaSiena Posts: 15,495 Skive's The Limit
    edited January 2021
    Thank you @Salix_alba_2019 , I’ve always remained calm when he’s like that. Well I don’t exactly say anything hurtful back. Apart from he thinks I said he’s an alcoholic but suggesting me to drink is basically trying to turn me into an alcoholic like great suggestion and support. He normally says sorry the next morning but he didn’t this morning. Still in the same shit mood. So I was just na I’ve dealt with this enough times. 

    It’s like he’s a completely different person over text. All we every do is argue over text cause he’s always in a shit mood. But he’s completely fine in real life. Like two different people. He said it’s because he’s only not depressed when I’m with him. I guess at the time
    i thought was cute But now thinking wtf. Depressed or not don’t speak to me like shit. 

    Anyway I’ll miss seeing his dog lol and I’m kinda hoping he doesn’t tell his family it was my fault or something. No idea what he will tell them. I guess I shouldn’t care.  It’s done now anyway. 

    He got me a necklace that says “I love you” in many different languages when you put a camera up close to the hole you see it. (For Christmas) And yeah feel like throwing that away.:/

    I’m in bed listening to sad songs. Feeling numb lol
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
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    Salix_alba_2019Salix_alba_2019 Deactivated Posts: 1,646 Extreme Poster
    @Shaunie heyyyy, I hope you shower yourself with lots of self love and care, its sounds like things have been a bit difficult for you the past few days.

    I agree that suggesting alcohol to somone struggling is  definitely not good idea, it's replacing one harmful behaviour with another.

    It's sounds very confusing having someone be horrible to you via text and nice to you in person, I'd find it very hard to know where I'd stand with the person. That being said, it's great that he can appologoise but it would be ideal if things didn't get to that point with continous appologoies and no change in behaviour. 

    People don't hurt people they "love". If he's truely depressed and it's affecting his behaviour towards people then it sounds like he might need some help with his depression. Is it something he'd be willing to do?   

    The necklace does sound lovely but still lol

    Shaunie I will always be biased towards you because I've known for a while and knowing how genuine you are , I'd hate to see you be put in a situation where daggers are constantly being thrown at you.  You're a lovely human being who deserves love and respect.

    That being said, please for the love of God, do not get into a relationship with somone who is mentally struggling when you're struggling yourself, unless they are willing to accept help or work on themselves. 

    What I've written might seem a bit blunt but girlllll I know that you can handle it and I wouldn't want to bullshit you either lol 

    *Gives many cyber hugs*
    Make sure that you're extra nice to yourself okay 😉❤️


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    GreenTeaGreenTea Posts: 12,938 Born on Earth, Raised by The Mix
    Keep getting this overwhelming feeling and thoughts that someone I love has died and I don't understand why.. nobody has died to my knowledge..don't understand why I keep going into this thinking
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    SienaSiena Posts: 15,495 Skive's The Limit
    edited January 2021
    Aw thank you @Salix_alba_2019 means a lot <3. He has tried to seek help for his mental health but got turned away. I told him he needs to go more than once to say he’s still feeling the way he does but he says there is no point. I’ve once called the police on him because he was threatening suicide with me because he had upset me and felt bad even tho I said it’s fine. and I thought that would get him some help but didn’t. Yeah tbh I’ve found that if you’re really struggling trying to be with someone else who is too doesn’t really work. I’ve supported him when he’s upset. But everytime I say it. He just goes on about himself and how he must be a shit boyfriend if I still feel like it & hints that I don’t try hard enough to not self harm. 
    He really needs to sort himself out. He seems to have BPD more than me TBH. Obviously I’m no doctor tho lol. 
    He even suggested a more harmful behaviour  than the behaviour I do now and alcohol. So I think it’s just clear he probably doesn’t want to be with someone with scars esp when comes to summer. Cause yeah how embarrassing. 

    I hope you’re okay <3
    Post edited by Siena on
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
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    SienaSiena Posts: 15,495 Skive's The Limit
    edited January 2021
    Just found out after my DBT is finished (still got awhile to go) I’ll be offered a 18 month MBT 

    I am grateful but feel like I don’t deserve this much support. 
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
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    SciFi_456SciFi_456 Posts: 131 The Mix Convert
    Hi @Shaunie d'you want to talk about it? ❤️
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