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Simple ways to support others✨

LaineLaine Deactivated Posts: 2,762 Boards Guru
Supporting people can be tricky it's no lie you want to say the right things but maybe you can't think of it! There are simple ways you can reply to people or just let them know you care. :)
(I'll put each part in a spoiler so it's not a wall of text, feel free to share your tips!)

- Showing empathy.
We can't solve everyone's problems no matter how much we wished we could, but showing empathy can help people feel less alone.
What is it? It's simply putting yourself in their shoes and imagining how they're feeling.
How would I show this?
You may say things like "I would feel the same way if I was in your position" or "That would upset me too!" "No wonder you're frustrated"

Sometimes we can't think of any advice to give and that's okay a simple message to say you're listening is okay too.

Active listening is a good thing to demonstrate.
With the lack of visuals and physical body language online, we have to rely even more on our words to ensure people know we are listening.
What is it? Essentially a way to show you are listening.
How would I show this? Several ways, one way is to show you have listened to what they have said by repeating. Not the whole phrase word for word, but a bit for example.
If someone says they have had an argument with their parents because they never let them go out with friends, you can say "You said you had an argument with them, how are you feeling after that?" Or
"It's hard when we have arguments with parents, have you spoken about it since?"

Another way of active listening is through Asking questions to get more information.
Open ended questions are great as it allows them time to reflect and give a detailed answer.
What is it? Open ended questions are ones that cannot be answered with a yes or no.
How would I do this?
My earlier demonstration on repeating is a good example for this, The thing with asking questions like "have you spoken to them about it since?" Is it leaves it open for a simple answer like "no" and it may leave you a bit lost on what to ask next, (these questions aren't wrong and can still be helpful, from there you can still ask whether they want to, etc it's just that it may be harder for you if you're unsure) "How are you feeling after that?" Is more open ended and allows them to think about their feelings and give more detailed answers like "really upset, it's like they don't trust me" From there you can ask more questions and offer some empathy.

Providing feedback. Can help gain more understanding

What is it? Reflecting on what's been said and ensure you understand it.
How do I do that? Reflection through paraphrasing such as "What I'm hearing is, it really upset you when she said that" or "it sounds like you're saying, you didn't feel appreciated when she said that" Asking questions to clarify certain points is not bad, and can help.
 How do I do this? "What do you mean when you say, this" or "is this what you mean?" 


 Lastly, a judgement free mentality! Treat the person how you would like to be treated. And remember you matter! If you need to step away, take a break or get support of your own go ahead! You're just as important as everyone here x 


You've made it! Here's a self care doggo


🌈Positive thoughts🌈

"This is my family. I found it, all on my own.
It's little, and Broken, but still good. Yeah. Still good." ~ Stitch

"Lately, I've been struggling with all the simple things in my life" ~ Cian Ducrot

"I don't know if it's because my heart hurts or I'm insecure" ~ Juice Wrld

Comments

  • independent_independent_ Community Champion Posts: 8,610 Legendary Poster
    This is really insightful Laine, so thank you!!

    I'd also say that if you have experience with the thing someone is going through don't be afraid to tell them you've been through it too or you know how they feel because that can help too when people feel alone :) 
    “Sometimes the people around you won’t understand your journey. They don’t need to, it’s not for them.”
  • LaineLaine Deactivated Posts: 2,762 Boards Guru
    Very great point! Peer support can be very helpful especially in making sure others feel less alone :) 

    🌈Positive thoughts🌈

    "This is my family. I found it, all on my own.
    It's little, and Broken, but still good. Yeah. Still good." ~ Stitch

    "Lately, I've been struggling with all the simple things in my life" ~ Cian Ducrot

    "I don't know if it's because my heart hurts or I'm insecure" ~ Juice Wrld
  • StephanieStephanie Moderator Posts: 1,083 Wise Owl
    This is super helpful, thank you for sharing :heart:
                                   "Happiness can be found even in the darkest of times if only one remembers to turn on the light" - Albus Dumbledore 

    "Like when I was down you just had that smile that made me feel like everything's worthwhile. Thinking of the day when you went away, what a life to take, what a bond to break, I'll be missing you"

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  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,463 Skive's The Limit
    Thank you for sharing laine <3
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
  • Jade09Jade09 Moderator Posts: 660 Incredible Poster
    Lovely idea, thank you for sharing with us  <3
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    I'm a community moderator. I'm here to help guide discussions and make sure Community Guidelines are followed. I can't send DMs, but you can message @TheMix or email community@themix.org.uk with questions or concerns.
  • BubblesGoesBooBubblesGoesBoo Posts: 3,590 Community Veteran
    Thankyou for sharing this! <3
    ' So I put a bullet where I shouda put a helmet, and I crash my car cause I wanna get carried away, that's why I'm standing on the overpass screaming at myself 'hey, I wanna get better''  
  • Salix_alba_2019Salix_alba_2019 Deactivated Posts: 1,646 Extreme Poster
    Bump!!!! 
  • LaineLaine Deactivated Posts: 2,762 Boards Guru
    Thanks for the bump! Thought I'd on with Mind has great info on supporting friends and family with various things! https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/helping-someone-else/

    Also to remember.
    If someone confides in you it is because they are really struggling, and everyone struggles with a range of different things. It may seem minor to you but it is big to them it's their biggest thing on their mind ❤️

    Likewise you may deem something really really bad when they don't. It's just about listening to them :)

    🌈Positive thoughts🌈

    "This is my family. I found it, all on my own.
    It's little, and Broken, but still good. Yeah. Still good." ~ Stitch

    "Lately, I've been struggling with all the simple things in my life" ~ Cian Ducrot

    "I don't know if it's because my heart hurts or I'm insecure" ~ Juice Wrld
  • tkdogtkdog Posts: 281 The Mix Regular
    This is great stuff thanks for sharing

    Yeah i'd say just being there and listening is a great thing. But also things like yep showing empathy and all  :)
  • GreenTeaGreenTea Posts: 12,938 Born on Earth, Raised by The Mix
    Just wanted to give this a boost. Christmas is fast approaching and it's a tough time for some. Wanted to give this a boost as I feel like it's necessary 💕
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