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Relationship anxiety

molmol Posts: 47 Boards Initiate
I have baaddd anxiety and especially when it comes to relationships, I want a relationship, I love being in a relationship, it’s just the first time meeting them situation that I get nervous about. There’s someone I’ve been taking to through snapchat and I want to meet him eventually but how can I go into that situation with as little anxiety as possible? 

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    AzzimanAzziman Moderator, Community Champion Posts: 1,859 Extreme Poster
    I think a lot of people feel very anxious the first time they meet someone. What will they think of me? What should I say? etc. The main thing is to show the best sides of yourself, without being fake. If they like you for who you are, they'll want to spend more time with you and go on from there. But you can't plan how things will turn out - everyone's human, after all!x
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    Lucy307Lucy307 Posts: 1,171 Wise Owl
    Hey @mol

    Like Azziman said, it’s super normal to feel anxious before meeting somebody but it’s great that you’re thinking about ways to make it less scary! 

    You mentioned you’d been talking through snapchat, have you ever video chatted or spoken on the phone? I find it much less nerve wracking meeting someone when I’ve been able to have a spoken conversation with them beforehand. Helps you know whether there might be awkwardness or not and helps you get to know them better so you then might feel more comfortable with what to say 😊

    - Lucy 
    Treat yourself as you would treat a good friend
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    Han93Han93 Posts: 309 The Mix Regular
    Hey @mol

    I think how you're feeling is totally natural :)

    I think Lucy's idea is a really good one and seems like the natural next step. Maybe one way to make you feel more comfortable when meeting someone is to make sure you're meeting somewhere that you feel comfortable - maybe your fave coffee shop or doing your fave hobby? If you can get your environment around you comfortable it could help you feel less anxious?
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    chubbydumplingchubbydumpling Posts: 487 Listening Ear
    Hey @mol :) It's been a little while since you've posted here, so I just wondered how you were getting on? 

    Like everyone has said, the way you're feeling is totally natural. Meeting anyone for the first time can be scary but it can be even more so when it's a potential partner that you want to impress. I like @Lucy307's idea of talking on the phone or video chatting before you actually meet - does that sound like something that would help ease your anxiety? It's also a really good way to verify that they are who they say they are! 

    Let us know how it goes <3
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    molmol Posts: 47 Boards Initiate
    @Lucy307 I haven’t called him or video chatted to him yet, that also usually sets off my anxiety too so I’m just doing things in my own time. @chubbydumpling I’ve been okay, I’ve been unwell so my anxiety’s been all over the place. Phone calls and video calling do affect my anxiety too but I think it does make things easier when I’m actually meeting them so it could be something I might try :) 

    Thank you❤️
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