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arghh y not???!!!

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
ok i jus came back from a party.. i feel shit because there was a girl there i liked.. she was sooo nice n fit n everything,, but i dint speak 2 her cos i was self concious.. n even tho i have strong inclination she liked me i still couldnt say hey.. why is this.. im misin out on opportuniteis that come up n hate it so much cos theres a lot of lovely girls ive come across... some1 pls help cos this is messin me up bigtime.. how do i lose this self concious thing?!!

vinay

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I know how you feel, I feel self concious as in people thinking I'm silly and stupid and it does get to me. But I'm slowly getting over it.

    If its the way you look that you feel funny about, then try damn hard not to think about it. Yeah, make yourself look good before you go out etc, but then concentrate on having a good time. When you're at a party, then relax, chill out, enjoy yourself.

    Otherwise its obvious that you're uncomfortable and its not a good thing. If you see a girl that you like, then take the plunge and go for it. Introduce yourself and start a conversation, then hopefully you'll lose the self conciousness. Next time, go for it, you've got nothing to lose, especially if you think she might like you.

    Good luck
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I have that problem too. atomic brian's advice sounds good.

    There was once a girl I liked at a party but she ended up dancing with some other guy all night because I was too self-conscious to go up to her.

    I find I can talk to girls easier after drinking a bit, but its probably best not to rely on alcohol.

    How did that thing with sending a letter explaining your feeling to someone go? i'm thinking of doing the same thing....
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I find I can talk to girls easier after drinking a bit, but its probably best not to rely on alcohol.

    i used to be so unconfident it was awful. but i went out one night, got totally pissed and found it easy to talk to lads cos i was drunk. i was still unconfident after i had sobered up, but the more i went out drinking, the more lads i could speak to, and this gradually made me more confident even when sober. its hard to understand and put this into words, but cos so many lads liked me when i was drunk, its made me more confident cos i know that lads do like me if i talk to them if this makes sense. so drink has helped my confidence greatly, and now i can speak to lads perfectly fine even when sober.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    oh i know exatly how you feel. there are always tons of guys that i want to talk to but im so fuckin shy that i cant. it always ruins me. i havn't learned to do this yet, but the trick is knowing that everybody is self consious in some sort, and honestly, if you make an ass out of yourself, it really doesn't matter, fact, the other person may not even notice
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    this is one of the bonuses to using the internet. Yes i am too young for bars and everything, but using the internet allows you to be honest and assertive. I am VERY VERY shy in real life, but on the internet I manage to be assertive. You can also get a good idea of the person on the net.
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