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Time for another ranty thread

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  • Kathleen07Kathleen07 Posts: 1,938 Extreme Poster
    Aw no @davcr0ck, some people are jerks :-( Hugs x

    @Kasa2103 Idk I'm afraid, but wanted to say - I know you've said you're ugly. I think you look pretty <3 Hopefully that doesn't sound creepy hahah. Hugs x
  • Kathleen07Kathleen07 Posts: 1,938 Extreme Poster
    I'm really so sorry.

    I feel I'm not good enough. And that everyone hates me. Whenever I respond or talk to people on here, part of me feels I've said something wrong or that I'm unwanted. Whenever I talk about my feelings, I feel like you're probably all fed up of the same problems and circles, or that I come across as really fucking annoying for any reason. I often worry the mods are sick of me (or will become so. What if I accidentally break the guidelines or something. Lol). The list goes on.

    It's not just about here, though. It's in general.

    But what I'm saying is... If I've ever upset you, if you hate me, if I drive you insane, if you think I'm a fuck-up, if you feel the same disgust for me as I do... I'm truly sorry. Ahah. Please, completely honestly, tell me. I'll leave the boards, or will stop responding to you, or will do whatever else to try to fix it.

    I just hate myself so fucking much. I want to keep apologising over and over. And scream and hurt myself or something hah.
  • Kathleen07Kathleen07 Posts: 1,938 Extreme Poster
    I'm just so, soooooo sorry. x
  • Millie2787Millie2787 Community Champion Posts: 5,143 Part of The Furniture
    Why the hell do people feel the need to constantly pick on me , like what the fuck is there problem , today someone drove passed , beeped there horn and shouted out the window oi hagrid 😩
    Sometimes all you need is one person to believe in you , for you to begin to believe in yourself.
  • davcr0ckdavcr0ck Posts: 774 Part of The Mix Family
     don't know what it is but some reason, ever since I came out gay, at my college year, people in my year have became more strange (nicer way to put it) today an boy in my class though it would be ok to stroke my inner thigh all lesson and grad my ass
    Love is love and everyone is accepting and can share their issues with no judge from me and I try to help 
  • DancerDancer Community Champion Posts: 7,740 Master Poster
    I feel so so so so upset right now and nothing is helping me. Please can I have hugs to try and help me? Here is a diary entry from on Tuesday 14th May 2019 to try and explain it. All of this horrible stuff happened to me at school in just 1 day. It is ridiculous. People ran away from me, people said eww to me, people said that they don't want to get diseases although I only have a rash, someone threw a book at me. Also someone called me an ugly frog, someone called me and my mum irrelevant and someone threatened to make my face even uglier (aka punch me if I didn't shut up but I am safe. I spent maths in a bad mood which was awful. In religious studies I was either in tears or outside the room. In community time I was in tears and wrote negative stuff and 2 year 9's saw it and told the teacher. I spent break time in the toilets crying on my own. In science I was feeling so upset and stressed. In Spanish I was sad until my student support officer came to the room and called me out the room to speak to me. He also found out what happened in religious studies and also my science teacher spoke to him because he was worried as I was so upset) and I spent pe sad, nearly in tears and on my own. That is what is wrong. People were also horrible to me today. People ran away from me, told others to get away from me, said they don't want to get ringworm although I don't have it, tell me to go home and laugh at me.  People have made me cry a lot and I have spent the past 2 break times crying in the toilets. It is horrible and I hate feeling like this but I deserve it.

    I sometimes want to be dead but I am safe before anyone worries.

    "There's a part of me I can't get back. A little girl grew up too fast. All it took was once. I'll never be the same." ~ Demi Lovato
    "The way that I have found the light in my life is through the expressive arts because I know that I will be accepted for the way I am." ~ Me
    "I'm going to get strong again and see you soon. " ~ Anonymous 
  • Kathleen07Kathleen07 Posts: 1,938 Extreme Poster
    Aww :-( And no one should treat you like that @Kasa2103. You don't deserve it. We're here if you ever need to chat.

    Sending massive hugs <3 x
  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,463 Skive's The Limit
    edited May 2019
    Lol stress does definetly makes me have weird dreams. Having so many since this training


    Had a dream that i went round an old friends house and their walls kept on leaking and then parts of it falling off and then after a while it meant that their days was a lot shorter and was forced to be asleep for a few mins and then wake up and then go back to sleep and they was really fed up so they tried putting bubble wrap on the walls but didnt help. Weirddd. But then what is weird is that i went round thinking okay ill try to sort this out. So when the next leak and falling wall came - i put a harmer in the wall and tried to get to the other side of the wall to see why it kept doing it - turns out it was a dead person and they was hanging and kept of swinging their arm into the wall which some how made it leak but i could only see the arm so then i cut the arm off. 
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
  • DancerDancer Community Champion Posts: 7,740 Master Poster
    Aww :-( And no one should treat you like that @Kasa2103. You don't deserve it. We're here if you ever need to chat.

    Sending massive hugs <3 x
    Thanks so much. That means the world. I feel like I deserve it and bullying has become normal for me. Hugs back. Xx <3
    "There's a part of me I can't get back. A little girl grew up too fast. All it took was once. I'll never be the same." ~ Demi Lovato
    "The way that I have found the light in my life is through the expressive arts because I know that I will be accepted for the way I am." ~ Me
    "I'm going to get strong again and see you soon. " ~ Anonymous 
  • DancerDancer Community Champion Posts: 7,740 Master Poster
    Fuck it. My phone didn't charge and the charger was plugged in. I remember that it was definitely charging when I went to sleep. Looks like I am taking my portable charger to school today.
    "There's a part of me I can't get back. A little girl grew up too fast. All it took was once. I'll never be the same." ~ Demi Lovato
    "The way that I have found the light in my life is through the expressive arts because I know that I will be accepted for the way I am." ~ Me
    "I'm going to get strong again and see you soon. " ~ Anonymous 
  • Kathleen07Kathleen07 Posts: 1,938 Extreme Poster
    Uh geez, um... I just felt pretty lightheaded. Out of nowhere. I hope I'm not going to faint lol...
  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,463 Skive's The Limit
    Um well my morning is going 💩. 

    Trying to call in sick but i dont have enough credit. So then i try to put money on my phone to log in to my account and ive forgotten my password so i tried too many times and it said to come back in 30 mins times. Trying to reset my password but thats not working either when i  only know my phone number and not my member name. I have few ideas of what my password could be but yeah it doesnt let me try a few times lol. 

    I would start work soon and they like you to call in one hour before you start and yeah i don’t know what to do. 

    All my family are at work and cant use anyone elses phone. 

    At this rate i wont be able to call in sick at all or will just have to actually go to work. Twice i have just not rang in sick at all and yeah to them that is like the worst thing you can do
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
  • Kathleen07Kathleen07 Posts: 1,938 Extreme Poster
    I'm not sure if I should post in the relatively happy/good news thread that I'm feeling a tiny bit better and more hopeful at this moment, or if I should post in the i need a hug thread that I'm still really struggling and I can feel the thoughts and feelings constantly fighting with me.
  • Kathleen07Kathleen07 Posts: 1,938 Extreme Poster
    edited May 2019
    [Deleted. sorry.]
  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,463 Skive's The Limit
    £8 for a charger that doesnt work. What load of shit
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
  • Kathleen07Kathleen07 Posts: 1,938 Extreme Poster
    Owwww. Jesus. My thumb hurts so much, thanks to my stupidity with making dinner :grimace:
  • DancerDancer Community Champion Posts: 7,740 Master Poster
    Owwww. Jesus. My thumb hurts so much, thanks to my stupidity with making dinner :grimace:
    You are not stupid. Everyone makes mistakes. Remember this: Mistakes are expected, inspected, respected and corrected. I found that quote in one of my maths classroom a few weeks ago. 
    "There's a part of me I can't get back. A little girl grew up too fast. All it took was once. I'll never be the same." ~ Demi Lovato
    "The way that I have found the light in my life is through the expressive arts because I know that I will be accepted for the way I am." ~ Me
    "I'm going to get strong again and see you soon. " ~ Anonymous 
  • BubblesGoesBooBubblesGoesBoo Posts: 3,590 Community Veteran
    At the health centre so often I should just move my bed into the place and make camp in the waiting room 🙃
    ' So I put a bullet where I shouda put a helmet, and I crash my car cause I wanna get carried away, that's why I'm standing on the overpass screaming at myself 'hey, I wanna get better''  
  • DancerDancer Community Champion Posts: 7,740 Master Poster
    At the health centre so often I should just move my bed into the place and make camp in the waiting room 🙃
    Good one. I go to the library at school so much as well. I am not surprised if soon there will be a computer and chair with my name on it. I should also move my bed in there make camp too. Thanks for the inspiration Bubbles.
    "There's a part of me I can't get back. A little girl grew up too fast. All it took was once. I'll never be the same." ~ Demi Lovato
    "The way that I have found the light in my life is through the expressive arts because I know that I will be accepted for the way I am." ~ Me
    "I'm going to get strong again and see you soon. " ~ Anonymous 
  • davcr0ckdavcr0ck Posts: 774 Part of The Mix Family
    Kasa2103 said:
    At the health centre so often I should just move my bed into the place and make camp in the waiting room 🙃
    Good one. I go to the library at school so much as well. I am not surprised if soon there will be a computer and chair with my name on it. I should also move my bed in there make camp too. Thanks for the inspiration Bubbles.
    And I do that for train spotting and put my bed in a station on an platform 
    Love is love and everyone is accepting and can share their issues with no judge from me and I try to help 
  • Kathleen07Kathleen07 Posts: 1,938 Extreme Poster
    edited May 2019
    [annnd deleted]
  • BubblesGoesBooBubblesGoesBoo Posts: 3,590 Community Veteran
    accidentally just ate grapefruit and I can feel it curdling with my meds in my stomach :sweat:
    ' So I put a bullet where I shouda put a helmet, and I crash my car cause I wanna get carried away, that's why I'm standing on the overpass screaming at myself 'hey, I wanna get better''  
  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,463 Skive's The Limit
    So tired but cant sleep. Great
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,463 Skive's The Limit
    Trying to revise and shitty car alarm is going off alllllll the time
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
  • Millie2787Millie2787 Community Champion Posts: 5,143 Part of The Furniture
    Right @Mike what have you done to the weather, it’s raining  😝
    Sometimes all you need is one person to believe in you , for you to begin to believe in yourself.
  • DancerDancer Community Champion Posts: 7,740 Master Poster
    It is so damn hot. Feel so tired, hot and exhausted. Also not feeling well. And I have my period. Such a crap mix.
    "There's a part of me I can't get back. A little girl grew up too fast. All it took was once. I'll never be the same." ~ Demi Lovato
    "The way that I have found the light in my life is through the expressive arts because I know that I will be accepted for the way I am." ~ Me
    "I'm going to get strong again and see you soon. " ~ Anonymous 
  • davcr0ckdavcr0ck Posts: 774 Part of The Mix Family
    It is so damn hot. Feel so tired, hot and exhausted. Also not feeling well. 

    My mood through out the summer 
    Love is love and everyone is accepting and can share their issues with no judge from me and I try to help 
  • L100L100 Posts: 128 The Mix Convert
    Right @Mike what have you done to the weather, it’s raining  😝
    It’s not raining it’s sunny lol 😂 
  • Millie2787Millie2787 Community Champion Posts: 5,143 Part of The Furniture
    L100 said:
    Right @Mike what have you done to the weather, it’s raining  😝
    It’s not raining it’s sunny lol 😂 
    Was raining by me 😂
    Sometimes all you need is one person to believe in you , for you to begin to believe in yourself.
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