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Change

RicochetRicochet Posts: 13 Settling in
Life is full of changes, I get it. My uncle killed himself, my whole family is split apart, my cousin died of a brain hemorrhage and a really close family-friend is gay and is hated by her mum. I understand. I have a personality disorder and I don't always think straight. But, at least every experienced I have shared with them is genuine and real.

Today, I got a call from my mum who said that a very very close girl in my family, my age wants a sex change. This broke me. I support LGBT+. I feel like the way they've been treated in the past is horrible and having Congolese heritage and hearing the stories of my ancestors, I feel like everyone should be free to be themselves. Racism is just as bad as Homophobia.

I'm scared now. I am really scared. I know there will be confrontation and I feel uncomfortable because I've never had things like this. I don't want to see her because I'm scared. I can't breathe. What should I do?

Comments

  • Lucy307Lucy307 Posts: 1,171 Wise Owl
    Hi Ricochet

    Thanks for sharing here, I'm so sorry to hear about the previous troubles with your family. You mentioned there will be confrontation because a family member wants a sex change. Do you want to talk about that a little more- what do you think the confrontation would be? It's totally normal to feel uncomfortable with confrontation, but you don't need to feel uncomfortable about her wanting to change gender, especially as you said you are a supporter of LGBT+. There's a good article here http://www.themix.org.uk/sex-and-relationships/gender-and-sexuality/young-and-trans-5178.html for a better understanding of 'trans' and what it means. Hopefully that might help? It'll be a big time and step for her to tell family members, so I'm sure she will appreciate your support now more than ever.

    Here if you want to talk any more!

    - Lucy :rainbow:
    Treat yourself as you would treat a good friend
  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,463 Skive's The Limit
    Hey @Richochet👋;🏻👋🏻

    Understandabely confrontations are quite really difficult and i think sometimes the best way to handle is, that if youre there - is to tell them theyre wrong without tryin to attack them as they may just get defnesive or something and it would omly get more aguementative and no where. But Maybe try to understand what theyre wanting to say - then correct them and education them and then move on. Failing that and keep getting confrontations and they keep trying to argue about it tell them to not vioce their opinions or views anymore. I think maybe Try not to waste time on racists and people who would make horrible comments and then i think the confrontations would get less maybe?

    But also think would be great if youre close enough to be supportive of that family member too and be there for them if there was any confrontations. Which i hope there wont be anyway. I think is nice you care that much to seek help from here and think you would be great support to her.
    Take care of yourself too
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
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