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Feeling like shit and wanting to give up

AbigailAbigail Posts: 816 Part of The Mix Family
Sorry if this triggers you off.
​Recently things have been hard for me with my caring role and since about Wednesday I have feeling quiet down and wanting to give up on everything. things that are familiar to me aren't anymore, the things I love have gone. I turned my phone off get some peace and quiet and then realised I should of done that. Im struggling. I want to give up. I want to go outside but something is holding me back. I haven't felt this bad in a year. I really can't cope and i want to do things to myself but I know I won't get me anywhere.
​sorry
​Abi
Some people think I am unhappy. I'm not. I just approach silence in the world that never stops talking.

Comments

  • AifeAife Community Manager Posts: 3,026 Boards Guru
    Hey Abi,

    It sounds like you're going through a really difficult time at the moment, I'm really sorry to hear how you're feeling. Feeling down and wanting to give up on everything can be really difficult feelings to experience, but you're taking a great step to reach out here and talk about how you're feeling. You've mentioned things have been hard for you with your caring role, do you want to talk a bit more about this? You also mentioned that you haven't felt this bad in a year, is there something that helped you through this difficult time last year?

    We're all here for you :)
    Maybe somethings don't get better, but we do. We get stronger. We learn to live with our situations as messy and ugly as they are. We fix what we can and we adapt to what we can't. Maybe some of us will never fully be okay, but at least we're here. We're still trying. We're doing the best we can. That's worth celebrating too ❤
  • AbigailAbigail Posts: 816 Part of The Mix Family
    Last year round this time I lost my cousin it coursed me to have a lot of panic attack and anxiety attacks as well. My caring role didn't help me it made thing worse and school wasn't helping me it was actually making things worse for me. If I remember correctly I send about 3 days with my form tutor because things were that tough. I really isolated myself and things just felt un-normal to me. A year on I'm still feel isolated but I keep talking and portent nothing is wrong and because of that I get these out bursts (If that's the right word to use) of sadness. these 'out burst' can make me think of thing I'm not willing to share with you and someday I will regret getting out of bed and sometimes even think that my life isn't worth living and if I slipped away what would happen.
    ​Sorry
    Abi
    Some people think I am unhappy. I'm not. I just approach silence in the world that never stops talking.
  • AifeAife Community Manager Posts: 3,026 Boards Guru
    Hey Abi,

    I'm so sorry for your loss, losing a loved one can be really difficult to go through. We all cope in different ways, and it's okay to be finding things difficult. In time things will get better and what can be important for some people is to look after yourself too. It sounds like you're feeling quite isolated at the moment, what do you feel can help you feel less isolated?

    There is support out there to help you through these thoughts you're experiencing. Have you reached out to a support service like Papyrus or Samaritans before?

    Stay strong Abi, we're all here for you :)

    - Aife
    Maybe somethings don't get better, but we do. We get stronger. We learn to live with our situations as messy and ugly as they are. We fix what we can and we adapt to what we can't. Maybe some of us will never fully be okay, but at least we're here. We're still trying. We're doing the best we can. That's worth celebrating too ❤
  • AbigailAbigail Posts: 816 Part of The Mix Family
    As a carer no matter what we can get isolated because we are a bit different from everyone else. Some nights i can be that bad that i end up doing all my jobs with a pair of headphones on just to stop. Its something thats going to go away but can be eased with time. Sorry
    Some people think I am unhappy. I'm not. I just approach silence in the world that never stops talking.
  • SienaSiena Posts: 15,463 Skive's The Limit
    Hey Abi.

    I'm sorry to read youre feeling like this. :( You need to look after yourself cause sounds overwhelming. Small breaks & self care could help. We're all here for you. You are doing great.
    Not much help I know. Sorry.

    Take care & stay strong
    “And when they look at you, they won't see everything you've been through. They won't see the **** that turned to scars that began to fade with time. They won't see the heartbreaking things that shook up and changed your entire world. They won't know how many tears you cried or even what it was you were crying about. They won't see how strong you had to be because you had no other choice. What they will see though is how compassionate you are because you experienced pain. What they will see is how kind you are because you experienced how cruel the world is. What they will see is how good you are because you've seen how bad things or people can be. The difference between you and your experiences are who you choose to be, despite everything that could have turned you cold and unkind.You are the good the world needs and the best of us.” ~ Kirsten Corley
  • AbigailAbigail Posts: 816 Part of The Mix Family
    Thank aife. Thanks shaunie. I woke up feeling a lot better today. Im not anymore but that because of what has happened today.
    Some people think I am unhappy. I'm not. I just approach silence in the world that never stops talking.
  • KathleenKathleen Deactivated Posts: 49 Boards Initiate
    Hi Abi,

    I'm sorry you've been feeling so down lately. What happened today to make you feel bad?

    -Kathleen
  • AbigailAbigail Posts: 816 Part of The Mix Family
    Hi Kathleen its a bit hard to explain but her goes.
    As i was travelling home on the bus this girl started shouting at me and my friend and this girl was eith here boyfriend and they started threaten us with a knife and when they got off my friend saw that they had a knife. I was soo scared and i really didn't know what to do. All i think think was make sure my friend is ok as she has anxiety and she had an anxiety attack on the bus.
    The police have been informed
    I was still in shock for a few hours and things have only just started to seem a bit more normal now.
    Some people think I am unhappy. I'm not. I just approach silence in the world that never stops talking.
  • KathleenKathleen Deactivated Posts: 49 Boards Initiate
    Ok, I'm glad you're feeling a bit better now.*hug* That sounds very scary and overwhelming, so it's understandable that you were feeling anxious afterwards. Your friend probably really appreciated you looking after her, as having anxiety attacks in public can often make you feel worse. It's good that you got the police involved, especially because it sounds like this was completely unprovoked. How are you feeling today, now that you've had some time to process it?

    -Kathleen
  • AbigailAbigail Posts: 816 Part of The Mix Family
    Hi Kathleen
    Im still shaken up but im continuing like nothing happened. Just have to play the waiting game for the police to take a witness statement from me and then i have to speak to my youth worker so she knows if i get worse over the weekend she knows why. Im ready yo forget about it but im not aload to yet.
    Sorry
    Abi
    Some people think I am unhappy. I'm not. I just approach silence in the world that never stops talking.
  • AifeAife Community Manager Posts: 3,026 Boards Guru
    Hey Abi, I hope you're okay after everything that happened on Monday. This sounds like a really scary experience to go through, so it's okay for things to take a of time before you feel a bit less shaken up about what's happened. How are you feeling today? Did you manage to give a statement to the police?

    - Aife
    Maybe somethings don't get better, but we do. We get stronger. We learn to live with our situations as messy and ugly as they are. We fix what we can and we adapt to what we can't. Maybe some of us will never fully be okay, but at least we're here. We're still trying. We're doing the best we can. That's worth celebrating too ❤
  • AbigailAbigail Posts: 816 Part of The Mix Family
    Hi Aife
    Im a little bit better still shaken up. The police haven't contacted me yet but im away so they can try to but i will not be picking up.
    Abi
    Some people think I am unhappy. I'm not. I just approach silence in the world that never stops talking.
  • AifeAife Community Manager Posts: 3,026 Boards Guru
    Hey Abi,

    That's good to hear you're feeling a little bit better, it's okay to still feel a little shaken up this will take time :). Hopefully it will be okay for you to give a statement once you're back. You also mentioned that you'd be speaking with your youth worker too about what happened. How did this go? Do you feel you can reach out to her if you're feeling worried about anything while you're away?

    - Aife
    Maybe somethings don't get better, but we do. We get stronger. We learn to live with our situations as messy and ugly as they are. We fix what we can and we adapt to what we can't. Maybe some of us will never fully be okay, but at least we're here. We're still trying. We're doing the best we can. That's worth celebrating too ❤
  • AbigailAbigail Posts: 816 Part of The Mix Family
    Hi Aife
    She was understanding and she rang ne yesterday but i was busy but i will see her tomorrow and if needs be we can talk about it more.
    Abi
    Some people think I am unhappy. I'm not. I just approach silence in the world that never stops talking.
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