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~self harm~

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
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Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    theyve obviously got serious problems if there cutting themselves. why else would they do it? you sound like you have cut yourself and arent really sure why?? may not necessarily be depression, could be attention seeking, feeling unwanted/unneeded/unloved.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Re: ~self harm~
    Originally posted by watch_her_fall
    if someone one cuts themselves does that mean they're depressed?
    :(:confused:
    ......just wondering......
    Possibly, but not necessarily...
    You may find these links useful:
    http://www.thesite.org/info/health/other_mental_health/self_harm.html
    http://www.thesite.org/magazine/specials_mental_health/depression/case_study_bpd_self_harm.html

    You could also search the boards - there is plenty of advice about if you look hard enough :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
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  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by watch_her_fall
    umm yeh i have been for a while...... but its not for attention as no-one knows, and i dont want anyone to either... i was just unsure ... sometimes i feel really down but im unsure exactly what depression is and was just wondering :(

    this is a serious problem and you need to overcome it. what made you start to do it in the first place? does it help you to relieve stress or what? are you happy with your life at the mo? seems like an odd question as you cant be happy if you harm yourself, but there has to be something that has happened to you to cause you to start doing this, and you are unsure if you are depressed. everytime you feel the urge to do it again be strong and DONT. you will not achieve anything by it, and are just making it worse everytime you do it. be strong.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Just because you cut or hurt yourself doesn't mean that you are depressed, and vice versa. It depends mostly on why you do it, what feeling you get from it, and why you feel that you don't want to stop.

    In reply to angelbabe, in my opinion you can hurt yourself and not be depressed, it depends entirely on the reasons and circumstances behind it.

    Watch_her_fall, if you were to search all the threads within health that are by me, Charley (which is my old username), you'd probably find plenty if advice from others, as well as other useful stuff.

    Just take care of your cuts etc, make sure you keep them clean, and dressed of needs be.

    Take care of yourself as well xxx
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by angelbabe
    theyve obviously got serious problems if there cutting themselves. why else would they do it? you sound like you have cut yourself and arent really sure why?? may not necessarily be depression, could be attention seeking, feeling unwanted/unneeded/unloved.

    It really annoys me when people claim anyone who self harms or suffers from depression are just 'attention seeking'. Im not having a go at you directly angelbabe, im sure it was an innocent comment but i think there's a big misconception here. Attention seeking implies that people are doing it just to draw attention to themselves but the truth is most self-harmers desperatly try to hide what they're doing and feel ashamed of it, but its the only coping mechanism they know. By accusing them of attention seeking you are putting lives at risk because one day they might move on to suicide because they're scared of being judged if they ask for help.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Useful websites and numbers:

    The Bristol Crisis Centre for Women
    They run local support groups for women who injure themselves, and also have a national self-harm helpline for women in distress.
    Telephone: 0117 925 1119, open Friday and Saturday evenings from 9pm to 12.30am
    www.users.zetnet.co.uk/BCSW

    The Self-harm Resource Page
    www.selfinjury.freeserve.co.uk


    Talk to someone as soon as you can, there are some excellent people out there who can help you.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    glad someone brought this up, i was thinking of starting a thread on it soon anyway.

    ok first things first - *HUG* to watch_her_fall. ok, so it's not gonna turn your life around but sometime hugs are good therapy.

    hmmm... self harm. i could go on for a while but i'll try and keep it short for now!

    totally agree with mancmanomyst about the whole attention seeking thing. most people who cut try as hard as they can to hide it, and if you do tell someone then it's to try and get help not attention! but it's amazing how many people get this wrong; as some of u might know i'm at med school and some of the attitudes here towards self harm are truly appalling

    as far as i see it, self harm is a way of coping, a way of NOT killing yourself if you see what i mean. and in some ways it's a bit like an addiction; some people chain smoke, some people cut. that doesn't necessarily make it ok, but i'm just making the point that it's not attention seeking or a suicide bid or any of the other really really stupid things people have said to me over the past few years.

    obviously it's something you want to get sorted in time, but the only way you're going to do that effectively is by dealing with the underlying problems - if you just try and go cold turkey you'll probably find your feelings just find another outlet

    those websites are good and there are tons out there. i've also found that there are some vbery funky game sites which can distract you from cutting int he short term. also, come to this site :)

    sorry for the length. i know i said i wouldn't go on. soz! it's just something quite important to me!
    xxx bella xxx
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
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  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    im just so pathetic

    no you are most certainly not pathetic! this is a problem youve got and you are certainly not pathetic if youve at least got the sense to come on here and ask for help/advice. thinking your pathetic is not gonna help you YOU ARE NOT PATHETIC. like you say, you feel lonely and unhappy inside. this is the root of the problem. please dont think your pathetic:(
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    well you told us and we certainly don't think you're pathetic! i understand you might not want to talk to people you know right now but you can talk to us :) you can pm me whenever, i'd really like to be able to help you in any way, coz i've been there and i know what it feels like, but i've come out the other side in one piece so you CAN get through it.

    xxx bella xxx
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    When i broke up with my b/f, i cut my arms to shreds but not because i was depressed but cos i was angry. I dunno if everyone who self harms is depressed...majority yeah but not all.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Ok I self harm. I tried to overcoem it and it is hard. I started because i went through alot of shit with my ex and my dad and school. Everything stressed me out and i found it like manky says - the only way to cope. I still do. I am recieveing help but i was ashamed that i had done it. A teacher found mine because my friend had been doing it and she had found them. So she checked us all. Otherwise nobody would have known about me.

    I hate people with the whole - people who cut themselves are attention seeking because it is not true. I know i wanted to get help but i was scared that people would call me an attenion seeker. And i was right they did. But at least i got help.

    Most of the time people have a reason deep inside that they don't want to share with somebody. This reason eats away inside them and they find the only way to cope is by cutting (this is not in all cases) YOU ARE NOT PATHETIC and i know what you are going through.

    I got help and my councellor told me to find my trigger point. The find something that made me happy. Whenever i found the urge to cut to focus on the thing that made me happy. And to try and avoid my trigger point.

    Another thing is tell a friend. Tell just one close friend. then if you feel the urge call that friend and talk to them or get them to come over. It is another good way.

    Hope that helped (even though it didn't make sense) Good luck. :)
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