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if you must know was 13. i know i dnt make much of a difference to you but it does to me.
andi dnt get drunk in public.
i was playing drinking games at a friends house one day and one of his mates gave me double shots insted. he then made sure i was on my own........
i think you can imagin the rest DONT YOU!
Maybe not a slut, but maybe slutty-tendencies?
I'm a virgin...I'm 17...I've only kissed four guys (I mean, blokes...)...and I have never done anything more than kiss...but still I've been called a slut a LOT. I don't dress slutty, I don't put-out, I don't...well, you get my drift...but maybe you flirt a lot...and kissing a lot of guys can deem you "slut"...just my thoughts though...
Zella read this:
sexual assault
and if he didn't use protection I suggest you go visit a GUM clinic
Risky sex - last paragraph
Looks like the change over re-opened this previously closed post.
It has been said so many times that if a lad is to go with loads of girls he has a good reputation but if a girl is to do it she is a 'slut'.
If I were you I wouldn't pay any attention to these people, as long as you feel good about you have nothing to worry about!
xxx
4get wot people say, they r prob jst jelous that ure getting more than them!
a 1 niter dsnt make u a slut, i admit, at 15 i find it a little "sluttish" but it was your choice, its your life, do wot u wnt wiv it. i'm a firm beleiver in that.
and neway, if a gut thought this of u he's not worth it, its in ure past, he shouldnt have a problem wiv it.
good luck shaking the persona girly, hope it all goes well and every1s advice has helped.
So basically what you are doing there is stereotyping people who have sex when they are underage. Basically what you are saying is that I am going to get pregnant not get he job i want etc... all because i had underage sex with someone i loved and still do. Some people do have the common sense to use protection. Some people are sensible. Just because you get some underage pregnancies doesn't mean that everybody who has underage sex is a slut or is going to get pregnant does it? I don't know where you think you get your right to stereotype people from. As for the flirting and kissing and hugging people - what is wrong with that? I kiss and hug my friends all the time and none of them see me as a slut. Nobody has called me a slut cause of this. I got called a slut for having DRUNKEN sex. Not sex just DRUNKEN sex. Just because you have the view that being friendly towards your friends iis wrong doesn't mean that it is.
Thats is the biggest load of bullshit i have ever read. Didnt you read she was in relationships with these people. Flirting when you are drunk is something people do. most of the time the people arouind you are drunk and therefore don't care what you do. reassuring her that she is not a slut is not reinforcing her actions at all, it is telling her that she is not a slut because she isn't. Its as simple as hat she isn't a slut end of story. I know sluts. They are people who have slept with 10 - 15 people at the age of 15. One girl in my year has slept with 27 people and she is 15. So hence we are not reinforcing her actions we are telling her the truth.
Finaly Olimarsh. Can you please try and not talk in text talk it makes it really difficult to decifer. Minor text talk isn't that bad but the last post you made was terrible i couldn't make any sense out of it. Thankyou hunni.
No you're not a slut, just a tease..... stop kissing so many people and people will stop mis-identifying you as a slut.
i agree with you Tek-ila, it doesn't make her a slut so please don't have a go at me, i'm trying to defend the girl!!
oh, and by the way, i dont know if you were trying to be sarky or if it was just a typo, its oli not oil.
i resent the fact that you think i'm harvested from deep underground and am worth a lot of money!!!
thanks!
People should not be so quick to judge and make presumptions about others.
didnt mean it to sound like i was having a go at you. just a bit grumpy.
nothing personal!!!!i promise!:D
No dimwitt, did you not read my post? I didn't state my opinion on her behavoir, but a logical hypothesis that society and especially 15 year olds do stereotype it that way. Obviously many of them do or Zella wouldn't have this problem. Right?
I don't think every 15 yr old who indulges in sex is going about it irresonsibly, but I would be willing to bet a larger percentage of them are as say, a 21 year old. When I was 15 I didn't know shit. I did lots of stupid things without thinking. Age and maturity and experience have helped remedy that a lot, but even at 27, I understand I have a lot to learn. Where are you England? Don't tell me their is not a huge teen pregnancy problem there just like the U.S.
Don't be naive. I wasn't implying its wrong to kiss and hug your friends. She implied that she gets drunk and hooks up with guys. That's what I caught from her original post. A kiss with the tongue is different than casually hugging and kissing your friends. hooking up in my opinion doesn't qualify anyone as a slut, but once again I am looking from the angle of her peers and the fact that they also know she has had sex. That's what I'm addressing b/c that is her problem to begin with: Why her peers call her slutty b/c she doesn't like it. If you would not read my post in such a defensive manner, you may find some good advise in it. Sorry I'm not the bullshit pampering type.
Not you again. Yes it is unfortunate that society as a whole seems so quick to judge sometimes. It happens all the time in all classes. You go to work with peircings and facial hair, and its assumed you do drugs. Hanging out with gay people seems to make you gay. flirting and hooking up with guys and sleeping with them at 15 seems to promote the actions of a slut. We have established that whether it is your way of thinking or not, much of society is quick to make judgement. It is up to an individual to decide if they want to be percieved that way or not. I personally would never stop hanging out with my gay friends b/c some macho insecure meatheads thinks I'm gay for it. But at work, I try to present myself in a somewhat clean manner b/c Its not worth it to be seen as a potential druggie therefore jeapordizing my career. If Zella is bothered by her peers responces to her actions she will have to conform at least to some degree to change them(fair or not). So quit missing my point. I'm not making a personal attack on Zella or any of you other girls that spreading you legs at an early age.
"spreading your legs" - I think you have read too many porn mags. Nothing wrong with porn mags, but they are generally looked at for the pics not for picking up vocabulary
Zella, I doubt very much if you are a slut, slag or any other negative comment that people deign to throw at you. Just be careful about dismissing kissing as nothing - sorry can't remember your actual quote. Its not nothing, not sure why you would need to kiss a lot of guys, but I supose I am coming across as old fashioned;)
It seems to be double standards too. If a 15 year old boy had slept with 2 people what would everyone say to them? Nothing I guess.
I can't stand people who judge. Yes I know we all do it to some extent but some do it more than others and seem to revel in it and think they are above others. Yes, so people judge, they always will, does that mean you should change your life because you are scared of what other people think of you? The only peoples opinions who matter are your family and friends, not the gossiping masses. At school I had a fair amount of gossip about me behind my back and it pissed me off. If someone wants to know something about me, ask to my face.
BTW, I wasn't even talking to you so don't say "not you again". I try to give helpful posts not just put people down and I am free to post wherever I like the same as you are.
PS Kissing is nothing, I have kissed over 50 blokes and it's just a laugh. I don't care if someone dissaproves of me because of that!!!!
Can not agree more. Your family and friends are the ones who normally know you beter than some idiot making a judgement about you
Not sure that I actually said or insinuated that I disapproved. Who am I to judge anyone. I just gave my opinion, but I didn't judge or put down some one in doing so
Yes but you were referring to me, so don't expect me not to reply. If your so immune to the gossipping masses, then why do you seem so upset by them? It sounds to me like you really regret getting off but not really sleeping with guys in the past. By the way let me ask you to your face: What in the hell does that mean? Yes I believe you have personal regrets and a grudge for the ones who sprayed you for it in the past.
Look pussykattie, try putting your words to action, b/c you obviously have issues with your past. You need to put aside your insecurities and live in the now. Past mistakes will happen and its up to you to learn from them. I'm sure you are a good person, but you don't have to justify it to me. Just believe it ,live it and you will project yourself that way through your own confidence. I don't know Zella's whole story, but it sounds like she is questioning her own actions as well as those of the ones calling her a slut. Its up to her to put in perspective the situation and decide if she is doing something to deserve that term and if so does she want to do something about it. I could give a rats ass what people say about me on most matters, especially if I don't feel I'm doing anything wrong. But sometimes the way people view me does make me question my actions and try to do something about it. I kissed many girls in college and eventually got the reputation of being a player which isn't the praise you speak of. Girls would warn each other about me at parties. I quickly realized that while some of these girls spreading these rumours were fat cows that I wouldn't touch anyway and who were probably jealous, they did have a point. So now I'm proud to say that with a little maturity, no one views me that way now and I'm proud of that. You should not take my comments so seriously it just feeds me. I'm really a good guy, I just like debating and having fun with it sometimes.
I got confused back there, I did not realise it was you.
I actually agree with your last post. :eek:
I did not say I was immune to gossipers but you can not live your life through fear of what people who don't even know you properly will think of you.
It just irritates me when people call a girl "slut" or "slag" as they are words very easily thrown about which hurt a lot.
I hate the word slut.
I'm 17, I have only been drunk a few times...I was drunk the first time i kissed a guy (thankfully, he didn't take advantage of me...I was 16, he was 20, all he did was kiss me...I am pretty lucky seeing as I barely knew him) and the other 3 guys I have kissed I have been 100% sober (although thinking back to 2 of these guys I have kissed...WHAT was I thinking?!) and I have been called a slut...that is NOT TRUE!!!
Anyway...slut is a misinterpretation, and is a stupid word...promiscuous is a better term for representing someone who sleeps with ANYONE...and bearing that in mind, guys can be "sluts" as easily as girls, oddly enough it is aceptable for men, which is bull shit...
Anyway...not sure what I'm rambling on about...but...do YOU feel like a slut? Ignore what people say...I have...even thoug rumours are hard to justify.
Also--I used to be known as "Desperate" on here...but I couldn't re-sign in, so until I CAN, I am Desperate17