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Friendship advice
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Hi my name is Teresa, and I have a friend who I have done a lot with. We are both straight but we experimented one night and I didn't feel weird. But this same time last year as I was a sophomore in high school, I had a best friend who someone got in the middle of us and tore us apart. This is happening once again, and I lost my best friend. I don't know what to do , she told me she wanted a break and I did so, but it is killing me seeing her at school, talking to a guy who has put her through hell. All the advice I gave her, she threw away. The person who got in the middle of us, convinced her that I wasn't all that great and decided to drop me. I am an excellent best friend, and I got molested last week and in a car crash and I told my " best friend" and she didn't care. It's like us not being best of friends doesn't hurt her. My grades are dropping and I am drowning in sorrow. She appears in my dreams and I need her but she appears not to need me. I don't know what to do. This is the second time this has happened to me due to someone coming between my best friend and I, but this time it kills me. I read daily horoscopes and it's giving me , I believe ..signs. Should I continue to fight for her? I am so lost, nothing is going right for me.
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Comments
It sounds like you are having a rough time of things lately, and I just want to give you a big *hug*
I'm sorry to hear that you are going through quite a lot at the moment, and that can leave us feeling quite lost and down about stuff. :yes: It's clear that you have feelings for your friend and you have been through a similar situation in the past that didn't end very well. It can be a great thing when starting a new relationship - to begin as mates and take it from there.
It sounds like you are happy with your sexuality - however your friend has said she needed some space. This can be a tough thing to hear, especially when you are quite sure of your feelings for someone else. But space can be a good thing - it allows someone time to review the situation without feeling confused. I might have got this wrong, it sounds like you are worried that someone is getting in-between you both and turning your friend against you?
You also mentioned that you had been molested - which I'm quite worried about, have you spoken to anyone else about this other than your best friend? It might be a tough thing -but as your situation with your friend is a little bit complicated, you may wish to speak to a teacher or another family member that you trust about what has happened? :yes:
It can feel like loads of bad things come at once, like the car crash - and I hope you are ok? It's a horrible thing to go through, and with everything else that is going on for you, it's easy to feel like your drowning - as you said.
Your friend has said that she needs some space, she is probably feeling confused about how she feels and as tough as this is - you may want to consider respecting her request for a bit of a break - until she is ready. After a bit of time, people tend to understand their feelings a bit better and may be ready to let you know how she is feeling about the situation. In the meantime, try and do the things you really enjoy, perhaps go to the cinema or socialise with other friends - they are great to lean on when we feel a bit low, and distractions are great at this point!
This article on the site is really useful, so you might want to have a little look at it: http://www.thesite.org/sex-and-relationships/single-life-and-dating/how-do-i-get-over-my-best-friend-rejecting-me-4149.html
I really hope things work out for you - please let us know how you get on, and keep posting on TheSite *hug*