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We're not victims, we're survivors!

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Many of you may know that I have been sexually abused and sold for sex (against my own will) in the past. If you have been through this, you may have been called a victim of sexual violence. Although true, I feel it's the wrong word to use. To me victim sounds like the perpetrator has won. Well they haven't. Your a survivor. You've survived their attacks and they no longer have a hold over you.
So if anyone has been through similar things, whether you knew the person or not, just remember your strong and you can deal with a lot more then others can because you are a survivor.
:heart: *hug*

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Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I actually am not a huge fan of either term - I am not a victim because I don't allow myself to be victimised but saying I'm a survivor makes it like it doesn't affect me anymore, which it does. It feels like the term survivor minimises what I still go through. But maybe I'm just talking semantics.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    No I totally understand :) I knew it wouldn't be for everyone :p

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  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Miss_Riot wrote: »
    I actually am not a huge fan of either term - I am not a victim because I don't allow myself to be victimised but saying I'm a survivor makes it like it doesn't affect me anymore, which it does. It feels like the term survivor minimises what I still go through. But maybe I'm just talking semantics.

    I agree with all of this.

    I have more of an issue with the use of the word survivor. Not everyone does surve abuse - I don't want to be pitted as lucky compared to them or be made out to be stronger because I did survive. That's wrong. Equally, as Miss Riot pointed out, "survivor" implies that a person has moved on and abuse or assault is no longer part of their life. In reality, in many cases that isn't the case. I certainly am still impacted daily: it's still there and still real. Yes I'm still alive but so are the events.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    This is true and inspirationally written Becki..

    I was sexually assaulted in school at 11.....,it was horrible :'( :'(But the boy did get into trouble :) Still suffer with flashbacks now though :(...x
  • BubblesGoesBooBubblesGoesBoo Posts: 3,590 Community Veteran
    Amen! Although i'm not a survivor yet, as im still struggling with the trauma of it ... but ive been looking at getting a 'victim' tattoo ... and once ive managed to put it behind me i want victim stroked out and 'survivor' written underneath :)
    ' So I put a bullet where I shouda put a helmet, and I crash my car cause I wanna get carried away, that's why I'm standing on the overpass screaming at myself 'hey, I wanna get better''  
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    This is true and inspirationally written Becki..

    I was sexually assaulted in school at 11.....,it was horrible :'( :'(But the boy did get into trouble :) Still suffer with flashbacks now though :(...x

    Sorry to hear that. Do you get help with it? I get flashbacks too and theyre not nice
    Amen! Although i'm not a survivor yet, as im still struggling with the trauma of it ... but ive been looking at getting a 'victim' tattoo ... and once ive managed to put it behind me i want victim stroked out and 'survivor' written underneath :)

    I want a tattoo too but wanted a semi colon on my wrist. Only certain people will understand why

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  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Not really.Amd its okay,thank you.Im sorry to hear you suffer with flashbacks too x
  • BubblesGoesBooBubblesGoesBoo Posts: 3,590 Community Veteran
    BeckiBoo wrote: »
    I want a tattoo too but wanted a semi colon on my wrist. Only certain people will understand why

    Sent by Sony Xperia

    To show where a sentance could of ended but didnt :) You are the author...
    ' So I put a bullet where I shouda put a helmet, and I crash my car cause I wanna get carried away, that's why I'm standing on the overpass screaming at myself 'hey, I wanna get better''  
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Yep :)

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  • BubblesGoesBooBubblesGoesBoo Posts: 3,590 Community Veteran
    i love that quote haha
    ' So I put a bullet where I shouda put a helmet, and I crash my car cause I wanna get carried away, that's why I'm standing on the overpass screaming at myself 'hey, I wanna get better''  
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Me too

    Sent by Sony Xperia
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