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My mum wants to see my self harm scars, please help!
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Guys please, someone has to help me.
I haven't self harmed for long, about a month, and my mum has found out. She saw some cuts I have on my hip, but now she is ASKING to see the cuts on my thigh. I CAN'T SHOW HER. She'll be wrecked, and to be honest I can't believed she even asked to see them. I mean, it's kind of private! I feel she's being really insensitive, but I don't know what to do? Should I just say no? I think she'd just try and look anyway, though. PLEASE HELP ME! Any advice, please, anything. I'm desperate
I haven't self harmed for long, about a month, and my mum has found out. She saw some cuts I have on my hip, but now she is ASKING to see the cuts on my thigh. I CAN'T SHOW HER. She'll be wrecked, and to be honest I can't believed she even asked to see them. I mean, it's kind of private! I feel she's being really insensitive, but I don't know what to do? Should I just say no? I think she'd just try and look anyway, though. PLEASE HELP ME! Any advice, please, anything. I'm desperate
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Sounds like things you are in a tricky situation. Is the option to openly speak to your mum? And explaining why you dont want to show her your cuts and scars. Also your mum may just be worried and want to see the cuts to make sure they dont need medical attention.
I guess trying to speak to her may be your best bet.
Try and remember she cares.
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Personally, I think you should get it over with and let her see them. Once she does, that's the worst of the moment over. I know we try and protect our parents from things like this - but try and flip it round... if it was your child, you would wanna know and see them, right? I think now's the time to let her be a mum.
This one is quite a tricky one :chin:
I think from what you have said she's only asking to see them because she is worried about you and she may feel that if she sees them she may be able to help you? What do you think?
It is incredibly hard to show someone you care about your SH scars, I know from my own experiences, but sometimes it can really help. When your hiding it, it's sort of like the elephant in the room - they know it's happening but they don't talk about it. How would you feel about saying something like "I know why you might want to see them but I am worried that if you do you will be very upset with you see. This is also a very hard thing for me to do" Obviously you don't have to say it like that but it's just an idea
Hope everything goes well. Keep us upto date
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We know it's not easy, well I do anyway! It takes a lot of courage to be able to talk to your loved ones about self harm so it may take quite a while before you manage to open up to her
If she does continue to ask questions just say that your not feeling comfortable talking about it but in time you will.
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I think things are okay c: When she asked to see my scars, um, at first I said I wasn't comfortable and she asked why. I didn't really know what to say so, I didn't say anything. In the end I did show her though, because she said "The only reason I can think of, of why you wouldn't want to show me is because you've still been doing it" I guess she guilt tripped me into it, but I haven't self harmed in three weeks so I didn't want her thinking that I've still been doing it. I think she was quite upset. She just said oh I hope these fade, which I thought was stupid, because it's not even her body aha. So, yeah, that's what happened. What do you think?
Well done for showing her them though. It's a massive and scary step but you should be proud of yourself for showing her
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Thanks c:
No problem, we're always here
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