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Need some advice...
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Heya, I'm new on this site so sorry if I get anything wrong 
So I was wondering about telling your counselor/therapist/whatever certain things and whether if I did choose to open up to them about something, they'd have to tell anyone.
I'm now 16 years old and when I was 15 I was raped by a so-called friend of mine (we no longer speak and I refuse to contact him ever again). This happened in December 2013. The only people in the world who know this are my mum and dad.
Now I've read online that if you are under 18 and choose to tell a counselor that you've been raped, they are required by law to tell the police. I cannot stress ENOUGH how little I want the police involved - this boy has been in trouble with the law for raping a different girl before but found to be innocent so I'm pretty sure I have no chance anyway - all I need is help and support to get through this mentally as I'm still having a pretty tough time dealing with it, won't go into details.
I have told a therapist something before which, although I stressed to them that I didn't want them to tell my parents about it, they still did because they thought I was in danger. This time around I am certainly not in danger but am still worried that they have to legally get the police involved and I just cannot deal with going through the whole police process emotionally.
So, I guess what I'm asking is, does anyone know anything more about the whole law around this and whether I could open up to somebody's help without them forcing me to bring the police into it?
Thanks for reading all that, I know it was long
So I was wondering about telling your counselor/therapist/whatever certain things and whether if I did choose to open up to them about something, they'd have to tell anyone.
I'm now 16 years old and when I was 15 I was raped by a so-called friend of mine (we no longer speak and I refuse to contact him ever again). This happened in December 2013. The only people in the world who know this are my mum and dad.
Now I've read online that if you are under 18 and choose to tell a counselor that you've been raped, they are required by law to tell the police. I cannot stress ENOUGH how little I want the police involved - this boy has been in trouble with the law for raping a different girl before but found to be innocent so I'm pretty sure I have no chance anyway - all I need is help and support to get through this mentally as I'm still having a pretty tough time dealing with it, won't go into details.
I have told a therapist something before which, although I stressed to them that I didn't want them to tell my parents about it, they still did because they thought I was in danger. This time around I am certainly not in danger but am still worried that they have to legally get the police involved and I just cannot deal with going through the whole police process emotionally.
So, I guess what I'm asking is, does anyone know anything more about the whole law around this and whether I could open up to somebody's help without them forcing me to bring the police into it?
Thanks for reading all that, I know it was long
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Comments
I'm really sorry to read about what happened to you. You're right to be seeking support. It's really good that you were able to speak to your Mum and Dad about it.
It is your choice whether or not to get the police involved, and you should never feel forced into it.
With regards to counsellor confidentiality, your counsellor should only pass on the information if they have good reason to believe that you're in danger of further harm. So if you explain that you're no longer in contact with this boy, then they shouldn't tell anyone else and you should be able to speak freely and get some of the support you need in dealing with this.
If you'd like to talk through things on the phone, you could contact Women's Aid on 0808 2000 247 (open 24 hours a day). You could speak to them more about confidentiality with your counsellor if you're still concerned.
You can also talk to a counsellor for free and in confidence at ChildLine free (including mobiles) on 116 111 (also open 24 hours a day).
I really hope that helps, keep in touch here too.
Danny