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Rant about my ex? (sort of)

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
We broke up a bit over a month ago? I can't remember exactly when but anyway. I do miss him, the good and happy things, the love when he showed it, I miss the kids, I miss the dog. I've been trying so hard to get over him and I do have days where I cry over the fact we're not together anymore.

So how am I supposed to forget him when he is giving my number out? I'm getting texts from random people being bitchy and sarcastic and it's doing my head in. I got a few texts about a week ago from one number, and then today I've had a load of texts from a different number and it's so obvious to me that they know my number from him.

I've tried blocking the numbers but I can't find an option to do this on my phone. Yes, I probably shouldn't reply but it's not that easy, I am easily annoyed a lot at the moment. I'm not being bitchy, just casually trying to find out who they are because I must know them, we knew the same people. I haven't mentioned my ex to them. Clearly these people must be telling him what they're saying to me, and what I'm saying.

This just makes me wonder if he's over me? He always acted like he doesn't care but if that's the case, why is he putting so much effort into making everything shit for me? All of the lies, all of the shocks, giving my number out. Unless he is just trying to make me miserable.. If that's the case he's succeeding. But why do I keep getting sad because we're not together? It's like I'm getting sad for the wrong reasons.

I really feel like nothing will ever get better. My life feels wrong at times, it doesn't feel right. What's right is the life I used to have with him when things were good, when I used to be like a mum, when I used to have so many responsibilities, when I was actually useful at times. Is this why everthing else in my life is crap now too?

Sorry, this was supposed to be a rant.

Not sure if this thread is in the right place anymore.

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I know how hard it is I feel the same way about my ex I know its really hard not to text back to the texts but trust me do not text back or answer the calls try and not get to hes level take the high road believe me once he sees you ignoring them thats when it will p him off

    By the sounds of things you broke up with your ex around the same time when I broke up with my ex I still think of her and I really do miss the time we had together and with Christmas just around the corner its even more hard but take this as a chance to get yourself sorted out and when the new year starts think about the year ahead of you try going to the gym or taking up a new hobbie get yourself looking all sexy be round people you love family and friends go out with friends make new friends and get your sl*t on I mean that in a good way haha

    Once he sees you doing well for yourself he will want you and if you still feel the same about him then talk to him try and sort things out but if its better not to be with him at least you are ready to move on with out him
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    'Get myself looking all sexy and get my slut on'? How is that supposed to help? Use someone else to get over him? I don't do things like that, I will never do things like that. I wish I had the happy times with the man I loved, the man I think I still love, not some dirty random perv that just wants a shag.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    What I mean is try and pick yourself up from the break up dont let yourself get depressed

    Im not saying go out get some randomer to shag all im saying is go out with friends and family and try and enjoy yourself

    If you still love him then talk to him sort things out see if you can work on what went wrong and fix it and get back together
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    He hit me a lot of times, he pinned me down by the neck in a tent, he nearly broke my finger, he pushed me and I nearly cracked my head on the bath, he pushed me down the stairs.

    A lot went wrong, so I left him. The reason I finally left him is because he flipped and I'd never seen him that bad before. He acted like he didn't care at all, but he wouldn't even let me pack my stuff properly, then he spread a load of lies around about me, I couldn't say goodbye to the kids and when I did finally see them in the street they blanked me. He has made them hate me.

    I would have rather ended on a good note, but we didn't, and I regret that everyday. Maybe if I had let him finish his violent outburst we could have had a conversation, I could have forgiven him and then we could have made up and then who knows where we would be now. Yes, I know that our relationship wasn't the best but I loved him and I loved those kids.

    And the kids.. they need me, they relied on me and it's killing me not even being allowed to speak to them. I know I don't really have any rights but that's not fair, I was their step mum for 3 years and they always told me they loved me more that their mummy. Their mum hardly ever spent time with the kids, and my ex was just grumpy with them a lot. I should be there looking after them. The little girl is 7 and do you know what she said to me one night? She was crying in bed once, I went up to tuck them in, and she told me she wished she was dead. 7 years old and she said something like that. It was horrible. They only opened up to me, the little boy told me when he was being bullied. We had such great bonds, I want to hold them and tell them I will never leave them again.

    And my dog.. yes it probably sounds stupid but I miss my dog. German Shepard, called Lucy. She was beautiful, she was my clumsy little baby and she was so soft. She was mummy's little girl and I miss how she would literally sit on my knee. She was like a proper kid.

    I just want that life back. I don't see my life with anyone else, I don't want anyone else. I want him.

    When things were good it was amazing. He had a completely different side too. He was kind, hilarious, gorgeous, loving and soppy, so affectionate and he appreciated me. I want that him, now, forever.

    I really thought that I was getting over him slowly but I'm not am I? I'm never going to get over any of this. All of this was such a massive and important part of my life and all of a sudden it was just over. One minute we hug, next he's upstairs throwing things at me, next I'm packing my stuff and I'm gone.. I can't deal with this.. I'm not dealing with this.. I thought I was doing okay but I'm not.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I no how hard it is to get over an ex im still not over mine im the same I loved her kids I miss that life I use to have but your not happy in the relationship he shouldn't be violent to you. You shouldn't have to put up with it just cause you want to have your old life you have to look out for you

    You cant think of the "what ifs" believe me I no thats all I think about with my ex and its not good it puts you down and you get depressed you can not go back to that life and put up with it. Its not good for you or the kids

    I no everyone says this but it does get easier try and take your mind of it talk it over with family and friends hear what they got to say

    Take a step each day try make your life better for you

    Im going through the same thing I think of the what ifs then when I do I think of why I walked out what happened for me to do that what was it that happened for me not to be happy

    Samething with my ex she was great she cared she was lovely but once I didnt text her back within a minute she would be thinking I was cheating its weird once summer was over her whole mood when from been 1 of the best girlfriends ever to the worst I still think of the times we had and it was great thats what makes me want her back but I think why is she an ex

    You just have to think of why you walked out and do you what to go back to the violence

    Same day you will meet the man that will make you feel the same way you use to feel with your ex but the kids will be your own and your new man will not hit you or make you feel the way you feel now it just takes time
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I shouldn't comment on here past midnight, I had a dream about them :(

    You can't just say 'I can't think of the what ifs, I can't go back to that, I have to think of why I left'.

    I think of the relationship every single day, I think of how it ended, I think of the what ifs. I regret everything. Do you not think that I've tried to not think about everything? I have tried and it's impossible!

    I know you're only trying to help but it's not, telling me what I 'have to' do doesn't help. Nothing will help. Telling me that I will find someone else in the future doesn't help either. I don't want anyone else.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    In my experience it will happen when you don't expect it. They always seem to be the best ones too. Some people never meet anyone. One of the hosts of the tv show 'Loose Women' has been single for 30 years...so when it does happen don't let them get away. You will not get many chances
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