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Whats the point?

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
This isn't for attention, it's not even for support, it's just to say... I've had enough of being this way?

Whats the point in writing, how I feel and think? when all it does, is make others hearts sink?
What is the point in speaking my mind, when even I know, that the voice is unkind?
What is the point in dreaming that im going to get better? when it only makes my cheeks get wetter?
What is the point in trying to carry on? When I know that what im feeling is so wrong?
Whats the point? I bite my tongue, whats the point in living, if life isn't fun?

Whats the point in writing this? its the kind of post you wish youd missed?
Whats the point in trying? when even I know this smile is lying?
What is the point in this you ask? the smile the pain?
Whats the point in living for tomorrow, its exactly the same.

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I have no words *hug* :heart:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I know my lifes not the worst
    I could be dying of hunger or thirst
    I could be homeless or live in poverty
    I could be imprisoned no chance to be free
    I could be living within a war zone
    I could be completely alone
    I could be ill, living with disease
    I could be in slavery, a master to please
    But worst of all
    I am.
    Im dying of hunger for some happiness
    Im homeless, no place to shelter my thoughts
    Im imprisoned, I can't explain what going on
    Im in a war zone, fighting with my mind and heart
    Im alone, no ones there to protect me from my thoughts
    Im ill, living with depression
    Im a slave, to the voices in my head.
  • AuroraAurora Part of the furniture Posts: 11,713 Part of the furniture
    You have a beautiful way with words, Flow :) - I don't really have to say, but wanted to reach out to you and offer you hugs *hug* - You've been through a lot, and you're still fighting, which shows an amazing amount of strength and courage.

    Keep going,

    Best wishes,
    Angel
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Thanks... but I have another part to the first poem but fuck if im going share that... butterfly got the unpleasant joy of reading it
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    It was not unpleasant, I agree, you do have a lovely way with words.

    Loves, Flow *hug*
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Suicide notes in the form of poems... that's been accomplished by me in the past... how do I make something so grotesque sound so poetic
  • LauraOLauraO Posts: 535 Miniposter
    :wave: flow,
    As Angel says you do have a lovely way with words. Writing down how you feel like this can be relaxing and therapeutic- do you find you feel better afterwards?
    LauraO
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Not really... I get angry with the words...
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Doubting myself...

    Am I able to even live without this without feel like crap?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    New baby in the family, this baby will love you! You can do this *hug*
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Theres no where to turn, my heart does burn, I feel all alone, school work and home, no where to go, how am I supposed to know, Why am I here, feelings so unclear, where do I turn who helps me, is any one able to set me free? how do I cope, feel theres no hope, what should I do? my life is spiralling down the loo. Im ready to end it, but here I still sit, I don't want to leave, but I feel I cant breath, I have no where to turn, so still my heart does burn
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    What makes somebody a someone

    Everyone is something,
    It's hard to disagree,
    There is a body,
    It's there to see
    Everyone is a body,
    With a thing trapped inside,
    So a body and a thing,
    So we are something,
    And somebody,
    So what's makes someone?
  • *BananaMonkey**BananaMonkey* Lyrical Poster Posts: 5,183 The Mix Elder
    Hey Flow.

    Sounds like your really struggling at the minute. I don't think anything I say is going to be different to what others have said, sending you hugs.

    Remember we all care about you.

    Just wondering how you are feeling today?
    " And everywhere I am, there you'll be, your love made me make it through, oh I owe so much to you "
    " So I say thank you for the music, the songs I'm singing, thanks for all the joy they're bringing, who can live without it, I ask in all honestly what would life be? Without a song or a dance, what are we? So I say thank you for the music, for giving it to me "
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hey Flow.

    Sounds like your really struggling at the minute. I don't think anything I say is going to be different to what others have said, sending you hugs.

    Remember we all care about you.

    Just wondering how you are feeling today?

    Not great. I've got a sore stomach, I was enjoying myself because I was to, but now I've came home I feel crap again.. it's the being able to actually have time to think, like my evening is planned, I'm watching the moaning of life... n then some films... but it's still thinking about everything... :(
  • *BananaMonkey**BananaMonkey* Lyrical Poster Posts: 5,183 The Mix Elder
    Sorry to hear you have a poorly stomach. Sometimes being physically ill can make us feel down cos we dont have full strength to be able to deal with things better.

    Yeah thinking is sometimes the worst thing to do, but its not something we can avoid.

    We are always thinking.

    Hope your evening went okay in the end hun.

    Keep us posted on how your doing.

    Sent from my GT-I8190 using Tapatalk
    " And everywhere I am, there you'll be, your love made me make it through, oh I owe so much to you "
    " So I say thank you for the music, the songs I'm singing, thanks for all the joy they're bringing, who can live without it, I ask in all honestly what would life be? Without a song or a dance, what are we? So I say thank you for the music, for giving it to me "
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Been falling asleep with plans forming in my head. keep telling myself that I am ok and that I can do it, but positivity just isn't working anymore...

    so what is the point?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Nobody can answer that for you I'm afraid.

    Could you not try writing a letter to your mum again? I really think that will help you to get the support you deserve.

    It's great that you're posting on here, keep us posted *hug*
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