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Cont go thew this pain no more it's killing me :(

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
I been thinking of self-harming and killing myself really close to doing it. I been I'll for a while now I been going thew all my pjs bottoms and nickes I went to the doctors on Sunday just gone they told me I got a chest infection and water infection. That's not helping. I been getting really bad stabbing pains in my side I was in tears down the phone to my mum. Doctors cont find out what it is that is causing the problems I got :(

I really want to die I cont do with it anymore :( it's really killing me

Comments

  • *BananaMonkey**BananaMonkey* Posts: 5,462 Part of The Furniture
    Hey Heather.

    Really sorry to hear how much your struggling with self harm and feeling suicidal. Being physically unwell can have a big effect on us emotionally. I know that for me personally when I feel ill it makes me feel pretty down.

    Sorry to hear that the doctors don't know what is wrong with you, that doesn't sound very reassuring, we go to our doctors in the hope that they can help us, and when they can't it can sometimes leave us feeling pretty alone and unsure of what to do.

    You deserve to live, you have a purpose in your life even though you can't see that at the minute. We all care about you.

    Sending you get well vibes. Stay strong

    Maybe you could come to chat tonight, if your up to it, depending on how your feeling, it's on at 8pm tonight :)
    " And everywhere I am, there you'll be, your love made me make it through, oh I owe so much to you "
    " So I say thank you for the music, the songs I'm singing, thanks for all the joy they're bringing, who can live without it, I ask in all honestly what would life be? Without a song or a dance, what are we? So I say thank you for the music, for giving it to me "
    '' It's a beautiful day and I can't stop myself from smiling "
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Ian not to good to come sorry :(. I really want to kill myself :( cont come no-more
  • *BananaMonkey**BananaMonkey* Posts: 5,462 Part of The Furniture
    That's okay.

    Maybe contact somebody, a helpline, a family member or friend? Your not alone, and we care
    " And everywhere I am, there you'll be, your love made me make it through, oh I owe so much to you "
    " So I say thank you for the music, the songs I'm singing, thanks for all the joy they're bringing, who can live without it, I ask in all honestly what would life be? Without a song or a dance, what are we? So I say thank you for the music, for giving it to me "
    '' It's a beautiful day and I can't stop myself from smiling "
  • AuroraAurora Posts: 11,722 An Original Mixlorian
    I been thinking of self-harming and killing myself really close to doing it. I been I'll for a while now I been going thew all my pjs bottoms and nickes I went to the doctors on Sunday just gone they told me I got a chest infection and water infection. That's not helping. I been getting really bad stabbing pains in my side I was in tears down the phone to my mum. Doctors cont find out what it is that is causing the problems I got :(

    I really want to die I cont do with it anymore :( it's really killing me

    Hey there Heather,

    A massive well done for posting on here, and reaching out, ooh eh, talking about chat, I haven't seen you in there in ages, you should pop in sometime! - It sounds like you have a lot going on for you at the moment, and I can understand how it can be overwhelming and difficult, and often we just feel a lot more miserable both physically and mentally when were ill. Have the doctors give you antibiotics for the water and chest infection? Infections are never pleasant and can be a pain in the arse when fighting it.

    You said you were getting stabbing pains in your side, did you express that to your GP, as it could be a worrying factor and might explain why you're feeling so ill, are the stabbing pains in front on your stomach but to the right of your stomach? As I know I went through it, and it was a few days later where I had needed an appendectomy, as my appendix burst, but it might be worth explaining how much pain you're getting on your side to your GP?

    I'm sorry to hear you're feeling suicidal, but in your last thread you said you were doing really well avoiding self harm, which is always great to hear, how are you coping with things at the moment, and what skills are you using (Distractions)? :) Do you think the feeling could be related to how overwhelmed you are, over being ill? :) - Or alternative stuff? As you have a lot going on for you, and you've taken an amazing step by reaching out to the support on here, you should be totes proud of yourself!

    You often tell other users to call Samaritans when there feeling like this, maybe you could give them ago to? :) - Would you be up to trying Samaritans, just so you have a listening ear, and someone to talk to? - It can really help at times when were feeling a bit lonely. But, I know for one, you do deserve support!

    If you however do feel as though your thoughts have hit a crisis level Heather, it might be worth going to A&E and your local hospital, as it would likely be your safest option, which will then lead you to talking to the crisis team, and it might be about putting in some temporary regular support with your mental health.

    You might also want to check out the 'Feeling Suicidal' section on TheSite.org, they have a variety of support links you can check out, and people you can contact for support, which is also in our amazing new mental health section. :)

    Look after yourself Heather,
    Best wishes,
    Angel
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    **Angel** wrote: »
    Hey there Heather,

    A massive well done for posting on here, and reaching out, ooh eh, talking about chat, I haven't seen you in there in ages, you should pop in sometime! - It sounds like you have a lot going on for you at the moment, and I can understand how it can be overwhelming and difficult, and often we just feel a lot more miserable both physically and mentally when were ill. Have the doctors give you antibiotics for the water and chest infection? Infections are never pleasant and can be a pain in the arse when fighting it.

    You said you were getting stabbing pains in your side, did you express that to your GP, as it could be a worrying factor and might explain why you're feeling so ill, are the stabbing pains in front on your stomach but to the right of your stomach? As I know I went through it, and it was a few days later where I had needed an appendectomy, as my appendix burst, but it might be worth explaining how much pain you're getting on your side to your GP?

    I'm sorry to hear you're feeling suicidal, but in your last thread you said you were doing really well avoiding self harm, which is always great to hear, how are you coping with things at the moment, and what skills are you using (Distractions)? :) Do you think the feeling could be related to how overwhelmed you are, over being ill? :) - Or alternative stuff? As you have a lot going on for you, and you've taken an amazing step by reaching out to the support on here, you should be totes proud of yourself!

    You often tell other users to call Samaritans when there feeling like this, maybe you could give them ago to? :) - Would you be up to trying Samaritans, just so you have a listening ear, and someone to talk to? - It can really help at times when were feeling a bit lonely. But, I know for one, you do deserve support!

    If you however do feel as though your thoughts have hit a crisis level Heather, it might be worth going to A&E and your local hospital, as it would likely be your safest option, which will then lead you to talking to the crisis team, and it might be about putting in some temporary regular support with your mental health.

    You might also want to check out the 'Feeling Suicidal' section on TheSite.org, they have a variety of support links you can check out, and people you can contact for support, which is also in our amazing new mental health section. :)

    Look after yourself Heather,
    Best wishes,
    Angel










    Thanks for ur reply angel.

    They transferred me to the hosptial about I all and I had a op to see what it is that Is making me so I'll they couldn't find anything to see y Ian so I'll :(
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    That's okay.

    Maybe contact somebody, a helpline, a family member or friend? Your not alone, and we care

    They won't be able to do anything :(
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hi Heather,

    It sounds like you are going through a really rough time at the moment and the thoughts of ending your life are going through your head. I don't want to compare you to me at all as I fully understand we are all different but about a week ago I reached my lowest point and did almost end my life but my psychologist had made me promise to phone samaritans or go to a hospital if I got to that stage. I like you didn't think there was anything anyone could do but for the first time in my life I did give samaritans a call and they listened to me which calmed me down and talked things through with me which made them all make more sense in my head.

    You have done really well talking about it and reaching out to us on the boards which wouldn't have been an easy thing to do so you are really strong doing that. Is there anyone that you live with at the moment? Could you maybe talk to them. If not spending time with people can be a good distraction and make you feel safer as you are not alone. It is when we are alone that often thoughts can escalate as you are given time to think if that makes sense.

    Angel has given some really helpful advice there so it might be worth reading up on some of the links. Even if you think it won't help its worth a try isn't it?

    Feeling unwell makes all of us feel worse and not being able to work out what is going on can be a really scary and lonely time as you may feel that people don't believe you or think you are over exaggerating. I don't think that at all as you obviously are in distress with it all. Maybe try and see your GP again when you can and talk through all your concerns with them. Your GP is at the centre of your care so it is them who can refer you onto different people who can help.

    Remember we are always here on the boards and you have done really well starting to talk about it. Hope you feel better really soon *hug*
  • AuroraAurora Posts: 11,722 An Original Mixlorian
    They won't be able to do anything :(

    Yes, helplines can't do much. But then, neither can we. It's about having someone to talk to, and explore your options, and choose where you want to go. Because you have a lot going on for at the moment, and it might just be about having a listening ear, and someone to give you a little boost to take action, as only you can choose what you want to do, and how you can make yourself better.

    It's about taking positive steps to your own recovery :)
  • **helen****helen** Deactivated Posts: 9,235 Supreme Poster
    **Angel** wrote: »
    Yes, helplines can't do much. But then, neither can we. It's about having someone to talk to, and explore your options, and choose where you want to go. Because you have a lot going on for at the moment, and it might just be about having a listening ear, and someone to give you a little boost to take action, as only you can choose what you want to do, and how you can make yourself better.

    It's about taking positive steps to your own recovery :)

    This :yes:

    You're so full of life Heather, I'm sure you don't really want it all to end - you bring so much life and spark to others. However, I know when you're in pain, it's hard to express yourself to get across the discomfort and stress you're feeling without it quite quickly ending up with a feeling that the only way to let go of the pain would be to imagine not being around. Do you have some ways to cope with life when things are really difficult? One person you can call who you trust, for example? Or a helpline you know will cheer you up a bit?

    You've done really well to get yourself medical care and fingers crossed they'll get to the bottom of it. *hug*
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    **helen** wrote: »
    This :yes:

    You're so full of life Heather, I'm sure you don't really want it all to end - you bring so much life and spark to others. However, I know when you're in pain, it's hard to express yourself to get across the discomfort and stress you're feeling without it quite quickly ending up with a feeling that the only way to let go of the pain would be to imagine not being around. Do you have some ways to cope with life when things are really difficult? One person you can call who you trust, for example? Or a helpline you know will cheer you up a bit?

    You've done really well to get yourself medical care and fingers crossed they'll get to the bottom of it. *hug*



    Thanks for the reply helen. I really cont to be doing with it anymore the first time I went they couldn't find anything so no point going back to re go or the hospital because they wont do nothing at all :( and thy day we cont find anything that's causing it. Give up :(
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    **Angel** wrote: »
    Yes, helplines can't do much. But then, neither can we. It's about having someone to talk to, and explore your options, and choose where you want to go. Because you have a lot going on for at the moment, and it might just be about having a listening ear, and someone to give you a little boost to take action, as only you can choose what you want to do, and how you can make yourself better.

    It's about taking positive steps to your own recovery :)



    Thanks no point
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Lauren92 wrote: »
    Hi Heather,

    It sounds like you are going through a really rough time at the moment and the thoughts of ending your life are going through your head. I don't want to compare you to me at all as I fully understand we are all different but about a week ago I reached my lowest point and did almost end my life but my psychologist had made me promise to phone samaritans or go to a hospital if I got to that stage. I like you didn't think there was anything anyone could do but for the first time in my life I did give samaritans a call and they listened to me which calmed me down and talked things through with me which made them all make more sense in my head.

    You have done really well talking about it and reaching out to us on the boards which wouldn't have been an easy thing to do so you are really strong doing that. Is there anyone that you live with at the moment? Could you maybe talk to them. If not spending time with people can be a good distraction and make you feel safer as you are not alone. It is when we are alone that often thoughts can escalate as you are given time to think if that makes sense.

    Angel has given some really helpful advice there so it might be worth reading up on some of the links. Even if you think it won't help its worth a try isn't it?

    Feeling unwell makes all of us feel worse and not being able to work out what is going on can be a really scary and lonely time as you may feel that people don't believe you or think you are over exaggerating. I don't think that at all as you obviously are in distress with it all. Maybe try and see your GP again when you can and talk through all your concerns with them. Your GP is at the centre of your care so it is them who can refer you onto different people who can help.

    Remember we are always here on the boards and you have done really well starting to talk about it. Hope you feel better really soon *hug*



    Thanks
  • *BananaMonkey**BananaMonkey* Posts: 5,462 Part of The Furniture
    How are you feeling now Heather?

    Sent from my GT-I8190 using Tapatalk
    " And everywhere I am, there you'll be, your love made me make it through, oh I owe so much to you "
    " So I say thank you for the music, the songs I'm singing, thanks for all the joy they're bringing, who can live without it, I ask in all honestly what would life be? Without a song or a dance, what are we? So I say thank you for the music, for giving it to me "
    '' It's a beautiful day and I can't stop myself from smiling "
  • AuroraAurora Posts: 11,722 An Original Mixlorian
    Thanks no point

    You haven't tried it yet though, so, aren't aware of the outcome, it might just be about having a shoulder to lean on, rather than, having to deal with everything alone. It's you who has to take the action though. Is there some form of support you're looking for?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    **Angel** wrote: »
    You haven't tried it yet though, so, aren't aware of the outcome, it might just be about having a shoulder to lean on, rather than, having to deal with everything alone. It's you who has to take the action though. Is there some form of support you're looking for?

    There no point because they don't care about me family and just leaves me in tears Errrrrr :( I not ready to speak to a helpline yet
  • *BananaMonkey**BananaMonkey* Posts: 5,462 Part of The Furniture
    Sorry to hear that Heather.

    Please remember that we care about you lots. Sending you hugs.

    People do care about you. It sounds like your struggling to see that.

    How are you feeling today?
    " And everywhere I am, there you'll be, your love made me make it through, oh I owe so much to you "
    " So I say thank you for the music, the songs I'm singing, thanks for all the joy they're bringing, who can live without it, I ask in all honestly what would life be? Without a song or a dance, what are we? So I say thank you for the music, for giving it to me "
    '' It's a beautiful day and I can't stop myself from smiling "
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