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Anxiety and going out to restaurants

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Hi everyone,

By nature I am a fussy eater, plus I do not eat a lot which makes some people think I have a problem.

Is it just me or do other people find they get anxious about going to new restaurants? I tried to explain this to my boyfriend, but he just told me to stop being silly.

As soon as a new restaurant is mentioned, I start to feel nervous because, I'm thinking 'Will there be something I can eat, that I like' 'Will they serve big portions' etc...I do see if restaurants do have websites, to see if I can check out the menu, but it still doesn't stop the thoughts, the nervousness...

I do suffer from depression and anxiety. At the moment, I am feeling quite low and I am seeing a councillor.

I feel stupid and alone... I can't talk to my boyfriend about this, as it only turns into arguments

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    You're definitely not alone, I know a lot of people who find restaurants stressful and feel like they're being judged.

    Do you have any kind of coping strategy? Like looking at the menu in advance, talking to whoever is planning the meal, etc?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I hate restaurants in general, for various reasons. If possible I try and get seats as hidden from everyone else as possible and sit with my back to them.

    I don't think you're being silly at all.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    piccolo wrote: »
    You're definitely not alone, I know a lot of people who find restaurants stressful and feel like they're being judged.

    Do you have any kind of coping strategy? Like looking at the menu in advance, talking to whoever is planning the meal, etc?

    Hi Piccolo,

    I do look at the restaurants menu in adavance if they have one on their website. I tried explaining this to several people, i.e. my parents and my OH and they just think that I'm being silly all of the time.

    Hi Frankipanda,

    Other people usual choose where we sit, so, I can be in full view of other people, it makes me feel on edge. Plus, if, I were to say 'could we sit there rather than here' it would cause tension.

    I just got upset yesterday because it felt like my OH wasn't understanding at all. If I try and talk to him again, it just ends up with us having arguments. As he terms it 'about my eating habits'
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Have you explored your eating issues with your counsellor? Eating disorders are one way in which control / food issues manifest, but other forms of picky eating that don't seem to be disordered on the face of it can also be related very closely to emotions and self-esteem, she might be able to explore that with you.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    piccolo wrote: »
    Have you explored your eating issues with your counsellor? Eating disorders are one way in which control / food issues manifest, but other forms of picky eating that don't seem to be disordered on the face of it can also be related very closely to emotions and self-esteem, she might be able to explore that with you.

    I have talked about food with her and she said that she was going to talk to one of her fellow councillors who has more medical knowledge than she does. But I have not discussed restaurants - this may be an area I need to discuss with her. The trouble is, I've had 3 out of my 4 sessions with her and might not be able to get more, because of funding within my area :( I don't know what I'm going to do, if I don't get anymore sessions :(
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