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Planning my life again...

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
I've had so much happen in the past Six months. My life seems to have completely and utterly changed- I've broken up with a boyfriend, I have moved house, I have had my health change dramatically (I've got a condition called fibromyalgia, which seems to be getting worse rather than better), I've got social services involved so that I now have care for my personal needs. I have had so much stress going on that my social life, my recovery, almost everything in my life as has had to be put on hold.

I really don't know what to do with myself now. I'm not well enough to be working just yet, but I really want to work towards it. I have lots of ideas as to what I could do - do an evening art course at college, do prep to start my MA part time in January, just focus on my health (but I'm worried this is one way I could become very isolated), work towards starting my own business. I just don't know what should be my priority and how I should go about planning my life from here. I have quite a few limitations - with my mobility, my energy, money, anxiety, which I feel stop me doing a lot of stuff. I will have personal assistants soon to help me out with this kind of thing, but I need to have a plan for them to help me follow. I kind of need to start being able to plan out my week, even if its a fairly flexible and vague plan, it's a start.

I kind of feel like I'm having to learn how to live again, within my new limits. I'm having to relearn so many skills I had before I got I'll (like cooking and cleaning and keeping myself together and organised). Basic life skills that I thought I had down before all of this. Where the heck do I start?

I'm so confused! Help!

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hi Miss_Riot :wave:

    First of all I would like to say how well you have done over the months and I know from reading your threads you have had to deal with a lot! You should be proud of yourself for getting through it and dealing with it especially with your health, you are a strong woman and well done :heart: I also have to say well done with gaining the support from Social Services that's great news!

    It's great that you have got quite a lot of things to focus on and sounds very positive.
    From what I have read you have helped yourself by recognising that you have goals to work towards and it just takes one step at a time. Like you said about planning your week, you could draw up a timetable of tasks, simple tasks like living skills such as Monday- clean the toilet and cook a simple meal in the evening? I know it sounds a bit naff with the toilet lol but it is just an example of how you can start off the day.

    Hope this helps a little.

    purple_rain :heart:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    That's not the problem - it's more what to do to filling in time in between those things, as in what to actually do with my life.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I would say set 'best case' and scenarios for where you will be in 12 months, 2 years and 5 years and start to work backwards as the steps you needed to take to get there. That should start to give you 'segments' that you know actually, you can get started on now.

    Then you can split that down further and say you know that you have to do a *something* between now and September, start breaking the time into weeks and start thinking of what you are aiming to achieve roughly in that time period.

    The advantage of working backwards is that you start at the best outcome possible, meaning you will always aim for that, whereas planning forwards if you aren't meeting your weekly goals you may just decide to lower you long term expectations instead.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I suppose half of my problem is I don't know what are realistic goals to make, taking my health into account and what's just setting myself up for failure. I'm so used to all my goals having to be downgraded or totally scrapped because of my health, it doesn't feel I can actually achieve anything big, but I have fairly big dreams. Do I carry on regardless and plan as though its all fine or do I scale back?
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