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Self-service check-outs can STFU

**helen****helen** Deactivated Posts: 9,235 Supreme Poster
Just saw this rant on C.A.L.M - made me chuckle.

http://www.thecalmzone.net/2013/06/the-rant-self-checkout-tills-can-stfu/
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Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    that is amazing. At least you can turn the noise off, unlike fucking B&Q
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Haha funny, I dont mind self-service machine but the only thing I agree with is the change bit. I always put in the odd pennies to get a pound back and they give it to me in 20p's, wtf!!

    Otherwise, pffttt, if you dont like it go to a checkout
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    For all her intrusion she never spots when you put mushrooms through as potatoes...
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Heh, just read the toilet etiquette one, should put that on the toilet door for customers at work to read before they go in
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I dont mind proof of age required on self service machines for alcohol, it's when it does it for things that aren't alcohol that annoys me. I love drinking grenadine (which is just pomegranate syrup, i.e. no alcohol!) - and I have to wait around for a member of staff to proof of age me for that :s
    As for not charging you correctly for items - that's one of the best things about self -service! If you then taken the item and receipt to customer service, they'll often pay you double the difference of what you were overcharged - which means that sometimes I have actually been paid to take the item from the store :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Fiend_85 wrote: »
    that is amazing. At least you can turn the noise off, unlike fucking B&Q
    I like to turn the volume RIGHT UP, to annoy everyone in the store.
  • plugitinplugitin Posts: 2,197 Boards Champion
    Haha brilliant! I'll use this as the monologue in my head next time I use oen...
  • Indrid ColdIndrid Cold Posts: 16,688 Skive's The Limit
    Lexi99 wrote: »
    Haha funny, I dont mind self-service machine but the only thing I agree with is the change bit. I always put in the odd pennies to get a pound back and they give it to me in 20p's, wtf!!
    Not a self-service check-out, but when I was in London once and tried to use a £20 bill to charge my oyster card, the machine couldn't read my card for some reason. So it gave me the £20 back... in £1 coins.
    If I had thought of it in time, I'd have begun to jump around yelling "JACKPOT!!!"
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Yes, the train ticket machine gave me about £16 back in £1 coins. My purse wouldn't even shut properly! I think they must be annoyingly programmed.

    The self-service machine is great. No matter how long the queue, no one else ever wants to use it in my local shop. Feels like queue jumping :D The thing that annoys me is when you can't find what you a buying. I went to the bakery and got a cheese twist. I could not find it on the list at all. Grrrr.
  • *BananaMonkey**BananaMonkey* Posts: 5,462 Part of The Furniture
    this made me giggle haha!
    " And everywhere I am, there you'll be, your love made me make it through, oh I owe so much to you "
    " So I say thank you for the music, the songs I'm singing, thanks for all the joy they're bringing, who can live without it, I ask in all honestly what would life be? Without a song or a dance, what are we? So I say thank you for the music, for giving it to me "
    '' It's a beautiful day and I can't stop myself from smiling "
  • JsTJsT Posts: 18,268 Skive's The Limit
    The reasons you get pound coins back from railway ticket machines is primarily security related. Coins go into a hopper style system so they can be given as change, notes however go in a separate locked part of the machine and once they're in they can't come back out. Seeing as many machines can easily contain upto £5000 in notes at one time the extra security is needed from those who smash into the machines to try and get the cash inside, especially at suburban unstaffed stations. If you end up with a load of pound coins you can always ask the Conductor in the train (if there is one) to swap coins back for a note, you'll be surprised how easy it is for them to run short of change.
  • Indrid ColdIndrid Cold Posts: 16,688 Skive's The Limit
    JsT wrote: »
    The reasons you get pound coins back from railway ticket machines is primarily security related. Coins go into a hopper style system so they can be given as change, notes however go in a separate locked part of the machine and once they're in they can't come back out. Seeing as many machines can easily contain upto £5000 in notes at one time the extra security is needed from those who smash into the machines to try and get the cash inside, especially at suburban unstaffed stations. If you end up with a load of pound coins you can always ask the Conductor in the train (if there is one) to swap coins back for a note, you'll be surprised how easy it is for them to run short of change.
    I figured that was the reason, but I'm pretty sure that before the transaction is final, anything you've entered isn't in the deposit yet so that if you cancelled the transaction at some point you'd get your note back, right? In that case, it's silly of them to make the transaction final before the card has been updated.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Yes, the train ticket machine gave me about £16 back in £1 coins. My purse wouldn't even shut properly! I think they must be annoyingly programmed.

    How annoying! I had similar - bought a train ticket with a £10 and got pound coins (ok, it was only 5) back. Was hoping for a £5 note. Don't think I've ever had notes back from the train ticket machines.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I have to admit I judge people who are unable to use a self-service checkout. It isn't rocket science.
  • AuroraAurora Posts: 11,722 An Original Mixlorian
    Whowhere wrote: »
    I have to admit I judge people who are unable to use a self-service checkout. It isn't rocket science.

    Morrisons self checking out seems to be rocket science, I spent ages pondering where I was meant to put the money until I got someone from staff telling to to but it in to the little slot at the top that said pay here, but the slot was odd, it didn't take my money or anything? Omg. - Well until Staff did it ;)
  • plugitinplugitin Posts: 2,197 Boards Champion
    TBF Morrisons ones are terrible. We always avoided them like the plague because you always needed staff assisstance for EVERYTHING
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Whowhere wrote: »
    I have to admit I judge people who are unable to use a self-service checkout. It isn't rocket science.

    me too :D I worked on the self scan tills at Asda for a good while and most people just don't get it. yes they will have occasional blips and be quite annoying but the basic principle of scan something, put it in a bag, scan something else...is not difficult.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    although I agree with the morrisons ones, I didn't know where to put my money either! ha.
  • AuroraAurora Posts: 11,722 An Original Mixlorian
    It took me ages to figure it out, but you know the area that says 'Coin drop' with the green label above it? Under the Wispa bars?

    photo-9.jpg

    The moneys just meant to go in to their and machines just meant to drag it along?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    The Morrisons ones are the best because they have a coin drop rather than a fiddly slot.

    I like the Sainsbury's one. They spit out vouchers if you could have bought your shopping cheaper at Asda (yes, you could) but the voucher printer is miles from the receipt printer. So everyone always leaves them there. Ching-ching.

    Insert cash or touch pay with clunge.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    The Morrisons ones are the best because they have a coin drop rather than a fiddly slot.

    The Sainsbury's one near us has those, too. Inconsistency. Tut.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    This is how some people react to self service tills

    just lowering the tone...
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I know self-service checkouts have their flaws, but they do have one advantage.
    I have used self-service chekouts in the Carrefour in Palma for one reason: They are multilingual. you can select English, Spanish or (of you are that way inclined) German.
    This is a boon to an ignorant Englishman like me who doesn't know much Spanish.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    One thing about the Morrisons ones near where I am, there's only space enough for one full bag of stuff and the bag you are filling. Also if you dont put things in the bag with the speed of usain bolt, then it harks at you. I also dont like the patronising sound in the voice.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I quite like self service checkouts. I can use up all my 1p + 2p coins in them :D
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I quite like self service checkouts. I can use up all my 1p + 2p coins in them :D

    This. I have a few jam jars filled with them so generally take a handful when I go to the supermarket.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I'm glad that website exists so that empty headed twats can gather in the same place and spew their garbage thoughts up there rather than on the rest of the internet where I might stumble across it.

    How much of a shit brain do you have to be to not process the idea that OF COURSE YOU WILL BE ID'ed at a self service checkout?

    Also, saying "a snobby, unreasonable wench" then calling the staff zombified because they don't race over so that he can buy some beer is a bit fucking rich.

    I guess I should have expected something like that from a self confessed 'stand up poet'. And fuck me, the hair and shirt in the picture don't exactly scream TASTE.

    Clearly I got out of bed on the wrong side this morning but fuck that guy. I hope a giant digital fist grows out of the next self service till he goes near and punches him in the eye and then asks if he needs assistance as he slumps to the floor burbling poetry.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    There are no self service tills in the Waitrose near to where I work, which is not bad thing, they also have a very large assortment of staff who are easy on the eye.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    #Unexpected twat in the bagging area#

    Don't like 'em, don't use 'em. Go stand at the fag counter and watch me smile as the assistant tells you to fuck as you have more than five items.
  • SkiveSkive Posts: 15,282 Skive's The Limit
    Funny to hear everybody's opinion on these.
    Along with lots of other EPOS systems I design and install these things for a living.
    Weekender Offender 
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