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Comments
surely she wouldnt restrict access? She never struck me as a complete cunt?
Youll get lots of time with her and entire holidays and noone will replace you x
This x a million.
Some people can jump to the wrong conclusion when she talks about her two dads.
This is what I wanted to say.
You're her dad, not some hypothetical - perhaps kinda nice - stranger.
I'd feel the same if my kids were living with another woman, but sadly it's you who has to be the bigger person in this situation, because your daughter will get caught in the middle if not. You may well be 'an inconvenience' to your ex, but you never will to your daughter. In fact, most of the people I know in this situation, the kids idolise the parents they don't live with because they get to have all the fun and none of the day-to-day crap. I know from your POV you'd prefer to be there day-to-day and have all the difficult stuff, but it doesn't have to be all bad.
That's not quite what I meant. I'm sure I'll get access, but some other fucker will have her permanently. An access weekend ain't quite the same thing as being a constant in someone's life.
Even her saying she has "two daddies" would be too much.
I'm lonely.
Which is totally understandable. But that isn't just the way things happen, and deep down I think you know it. You're just using that image to hurt yourself with.
Sodchild is a smart cookie, she knows who her dad is.
But now I'm back home. It's cold and silent, I'm tired and just feel really on edge now. There is too much missing from what was OUR home. No noise, no smells, no people.
Hmm. Maybe I should try and sleep before I drop from melancholy into depressed again.
Long conversation with the ex about selling our house, and then the two rooms I was interested in down in London appear to have gone in the few hours it took me to reply.
Just feeling like I don't know why I fucking bother getting out of bed.
Persist and you'll succeed.
(At least you've got a shot - I'd swap househunting in London for my last project any day).
Selling the house isn't going to be fun, but I know you know it needs done, at least this way you're doing it all at once.
And, as you said a number of times, you might find yourself in a position where you can move a bit early and househunt from a friend's base in town from which you can just say yes immediately. Something will come up!
I'm just having one of those days where nothing is going quite right. The outlook is very grey. I just feel empty and exhausted now after being so sad earlier.
It's also completely normal to feel empty after let downs. Don't beat yourself up about it, and try not to get into the mindset that that's always how it's going to be.
I am pissed off at myself for this.
I know this happens when I bottle up what's upset me. But I never know how to show I'm upset. I always expect to be ignored or abandoned if I acknowledge to someone that they have upset me.
the person may have no clue that they had upset you, and may want to modify their behaviour.
a fear of abandonment is not any excuse to let yourself be walked over.