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Make masturbation mainstream

*Holly**Holly* Deactivated Posts: 140 Helping Hand
Hello all :wave:

Our very own TheSite intern has just written a rant about how we should all talk about masturbation more. We all do it, so why don't we chat about it?

Have a read and let us know your thoughts.

http://www.thesite.org/community/reallife/rants/makemasturbationmainstream

Holly

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I am absolutely with you about this Holly. I PM'd you my phone number, feel free to talk to me about everything masturbation related. Don't by shy to use boo-boo words either.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I think Kenny's piece argues more for the damage that can be done by sexually repressed, religious parents.

    Who really continued the pretence they didn't wank beyond the age of about fifteen? Does anyone still bother?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    My mother once asked my sister and I if we masturbated (not together of course :yuck: ) which was awkward but atleast getting it out there. She then went on to say that she didn't expect us to admit it even if we did because when she was our age she was doing it and would never admit it to her mother! Quite a conversation.

    Like Kenny said there should be more talk in sex ed classes about masturbation, I dont think i've ever witnessed it come up and it would be useful to reinforce the positive attitude towards masturbation for the youngens going through puberty. Maybe something will be done about it in the future? :chin:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    StrubbleS wrote: »
    I am absolutely with you about this Holly. I PM'd you my phone number, feel free to talk to me about everything masturbation related. Don't by shy to use boo-boo words either.

    Brilliant! Lol.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I think Kenny's piece argues more for the damage that can be done by sexually repressed, religious parents.

    Pretty much.

    Most of that rant is anecdote stretched into statement of fact - "But most of us will never admit (wanking) to anyone" or "Like most parents, mine were puritanical fascists", are just wrong.

    I had a very Catholic education and still managed to learn about the joys of self abuse. Obviously I apologised to a picture of the Pope and said three Hail Marys post tug though :o

    If everyone enjoys the occasional ham shank as the rant purports, then it's already the very definition of mainstream.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Kenny thinks we should talk about masturbation as much as we masturbate.

    I don't talk about masturbating for the same reason I don't talk about shitting. No-one wants that image in their head.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Just 'cause it's mainstream doesn't mean people discuss it properly. Kids going through puberty really could do with being told about these things properly rather than making than feel dirty/ashamed that they're doing something totally natural.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I don't talk about masturbating for the same reason I don't talk about shitting. No-one wants that image in their head.

    You get toilet trained though, and everybody knows everybody poops, with the possible exception of her majesty.

    Where's the conversation about masturbation? I do it, but I've only been doing it for a year, and I feel dirty and grubby afterwards. I don't feel that way about taking a shit.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Fiend_85 wrote: »
    Where's the conversation about masturbation? I do it, but I've only been doing it for a year, and I feel dirty and grubby afterwards.

    Could you clarify "dirty and grubby"? Dirty as in you've performed a sinful act and are ashamed of yourself? Or just that you got human mess everywhere?

    Unless you're talking about the Gloom. Then I'm afraid you just have to get used to that.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    The gloom, as in le petit morte? No I don't get that, and by dirty I mean ashamed. Which pisses me off, there's no reason to be bothered that I want or need to relieve sexual tension. I imagine that it's a result of having little to no open and honest sexual communication and a very clear memory of being very small and my mum telling me "not to fiddle". I've since found out that's its fairly common for children that small to play with their bits in a non-sexual way, but still, it remains.

    As it happens, I've just done a massive poo, at work no less. I've just been paid a few quid to crap at work. I feel nice, lighter, it's a good thing and a comfortable poo, I'm not going to tell everyone in the office I've done one, but I did read that 1/4 of guys wank off at work and that's gross (for some reason), but the fact that we all crap at work is not.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Fiend_85 wrote: »
    The gloom, as in le petit morte? No I don't get that, and by dirty I mean ashamed. Which pisses me off, there's no reason to be bothered that I want or need to relieve sexual tension.
    Surely that depends on what you're looking at at the time? ;)

    Lol, that reminds me of the episode of Peep Show where Jeremy has a wank, but all he's got is a £20 note, so he has to use the picture of the queen.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Fiend_85 wrote: »
    You get toilet trained though, and everybody knows everybody poops, with the possible exception of her majesty.
    Toilet training is actually about controlling your instincts though. It teaches children to wait until a certain time and place to go. In that sense, it's about facilitating the idea that it's a bodily function that we don't share with others and only talk about in the politest possible terms (again, America leads the way on this one, even refusing to use the word toilet). No child needs training to go to the toilet, they just need training to do it at a time and place that doesn't embarrass mum and dad, because it isn't something we're open about.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I actually felt better about it reading erotica rather than watching porn. But they're both hard work to find the right stuff, but when I do it works. hmm, detailed eh?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    A lot of women say that. But then most porn is aimed at men. I'd suggest you look at some of the products by Danish film company Zentropa, that is specifically aimed at women. I haven't seen any of them myself, but the company makes brilliant (normal) films.

    The other option is the combination of the two, with comics. When I went to Japan, I went to the geek capital of the world and visited a load of comic book stores. They all had a well-stocked porn section, and it was amazing to see how open everyone was about flicking through cartoon porn. Which is a strange paradox, because from everything I've heard, the idea of two Japanese people talking openly about masturbation is even less likely that two Brits. I hear they do ones specifically aimed at women too (in particular I read a story about how comics featuring two gay male characters are very popular with Japanese women).
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    See, a conversation about masturbation. No-one needs to know the details, physically as it were, but you've just recommended some porn to me to use; which is nice.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Fiend_85 wrote: »
    No-one needs to know the details, physically as it were

    I'm usually hunched double going at it frenetically with tears streaming down my face only stopping briefly to choke out the words "begone, vile testosterone" through my sobs.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I was wrong, we do need to know.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I'm usually hunched double going at it frenetically with tears streaming down my face only stopping briefly to choke out the words "begone, vile testosterone" through my sobs.

    Reminds me of this:

    from 1:20.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    How about a Government Minister for masturbation?

    From what I hear, there are plenty of very capable candidates! :thumb:

    Jed
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Use Benedict from Big Brother. After watching his cringe-worthy attempt at justifying why it's ok to wank in a shower in a public area he'd be the ideal candidate.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I think the discuss needs to be less about masturbation per say and more about human sexuality - not the physical functions, but all the various ways it can be expressed and how we can express ourselves. How I see it is that masturbation isn't always a sexual act - sometimes its just a release of tension, which is no different (at least in moralistic terms) than going for a piss when you've had to hold it. Yes it can be a very sexual act even one that's shared but I don't think it should always be viewed as such.
  • SkiveSkive Posts: 15,282 Skive's The Limit
    I think blokes are generally pretty open about having a tug. My mates and I certainly are.
    Women are definitely a bit more shy about it, though I know some ladies who are quite open about having a dildo.
    Weekender Offender 
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