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Virginity
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
I lost my virginity durring a hookup.
A barley knew the guy.
But he moved the day after to another state, and now I have these wierd confused feelings that i've never had before, and I don't know what to do about them.
He says he wants me to be safe, and he's worried about me, but I think it's just his guilt overwhealming him.
I haven't even been able to cry about this whole incident yet.
I know I need to, but for some reason I just can't seem to cry.
and i've been cutting alot to help myself forget the pain.
I feel so alone, and unwanted.
A barley knew the guy.
But he moved the day after to another state, and now I have these wierd confused feelings that i've never had before, and I don't know what to do about them.
He says he wants me to be safe, and he's worried about me, but I think it's just his guilt overwhealming him.
I haven't even been able to cry about this whole incident yet.
I know I need to, but for some reason I just can't seem to cry.
and i've been cutting alot to help myself forget the pain.
I feel so alone, and unwanted.
0
Comments
I think you are taking this a bit too seriously. I know, losing one's virginity might be a big deal, but you knew where you were going into: having a hook up with someone you hardly know. You won't have any other option than to get over it.
not gonna lie.
I didn't know what i was getting into
because i went into it thinking maybe i would just give him a blow job or hj
i'm too self concious of myself so i never thought it would happen, but then it did.
but whatever obviously i just shouldn't talk anymore
I'm sorry to hear you're going through a rough time. *hug* Losing your virginity is a big deal for most people, and when it doesn't happen exactly how you imagined it can be a real disappointment. Can I ask what is it about the situation that has made you so upset? Was it just that you didn't know them? Or felt pressured? Or just that sex didn't live up to the expectation?
We have an article here on TheSite called regret losing your virginity that helps with some of the hangups people can get afterwards. It's worth a read. Unfortunately you can't go back in time and change things, but you can look at what happened, why it upset you, and try and protect yourself from it happening again. It sounds like you were a little unsure of your boundaries, this article called How to say no to sex may help in the future.
Have you spoken to anyone about what's happened? Maybe a friend? TheSite boards are always here as well of course.
Let us know how you're getting on.
Big hugs
Holly
If you regret the decision you made to sleep with the guy (and yes, it was your decision) then you just have to work yourself through that regret and not let it drive you crazy.
The last thing you should do when trying to open up and work through these issues is get defensive about it when people give advice instead of sympathy, because advice will get you a lot further.
Cut the girl some slack you meanies (yes you are).
Yes, but advice without sympathy or empathy is like chocolate without cocoa - it doesn't hit the spot.
To get this thread back on track, let's remember the actual questions, they were good - Sabrina, if you feel able to answer these then it probably will help.