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I miss my bestfriend like hell

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Hey I'm new here. 16. just figured since my bestfriend's not here anymore, I'm gonna need someone to talk to . Im from the philippines by the way. So here's my story.

I have this bestfriend. We've been close friends just last last year. but then just last school year, we became the best of bestfriends. I treated her like a little sister. everything was going really great. Me and her side by side, washing anyone or anything that comes between us. I was not the ideal "bestfriend" type. I was really moody and just I dont know, Even I can't understand myself. But she did. And only in her I felt that she really did. she always knew what to do or say when I open up some of my problems to her. That made me really appreciate her more. I was't good at the comforting bestfriend part so instead I just did everything I could to keep her smile up and to prevent her from all the hurt she might get. I really really liked it, having her as my bestfriend. I thought that like, in every problem that goes around my family or something I just say Whatever, I;ve got the bestest bestfriend by my side. but then as we graduated High school, She then told us of this college thing of hers.
She said that her parents want her to go to the US . I was literally crushed by that news. We couldn't even stand not seeing each other for more than 2 days. but then it was told that she had to go there for atleast a year, so it was said.

So I TRIED and TRIED to accept that nothing lasts forever. so I tried to adjust and just said that what's one year?. So then I started having these dilemmas. Realizing that I really couldn't handle it. So the day came, she left. I did not want to go near her cuz people we're so emotional. I stuck my stupid head off with the boys who kept on laughin. until,.... I saw her turn her back. twas time to go. I did not even get to hug her being afraid of not holding back my emotions. I really don't have any control over myself when it comes to those things. So yea, what's one year right? but then I heard the REALLY REALLY BAD NEWS. it wasn;t a year. It was 5 years,.... or more. I was the last to know. then I confronted her with it. Just to find out that yea, I was... the last to know. everyone knew. No one told me . That was a total breakdown. I did not know what to feel. I just was staring at the screen hoping that it was all a bad dream but no, it was reality.

And now, it has been 3 months I guess. and I miss her MORE AND MORE each and every minute I am not with her. Ive got no one to talk to. no one to play with. just figured that with my age, personality and my situation, why did someone like her have to go?. :'(
now I just simple go to the city's boulevard to take a view at the sky/stars. listen to the waves. I always told her encouraging stuff like We'll always be under thesame sky. just so she won't be sad just like me. but what I kept on convincing my self is that everything's gonna be ok. I try, but never for a minute did I succeed. I JUST MISS MY LITTLE SISTER/BESTFRIEND/MENTOR . :((:(

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Sorry for your loss, but life goes on. It has to go on. Since you cannot change the situation all I can advice you, is to give your best to adapt to a life without her. Find new friends, start hobbies (I recently got into climbing, to meet new people), continue your own education. Maybe find a new passion, like reading books. Books can teach you so many things and to be honest your horizon sounds a bit narrow: There is nothing except her for you in this world, which is never good, regardless of the person. There is always more, and I suggest you start to discover it.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hi IMY,

    Welcome to the boards :)

    So sorry to hear you are going through this. It seems that not only do you miss her but it was also a shock that she is leaving for so long. Are you two still in regular contact?

    Unfortunately changes in life creates changes in friendships and even though you are apart, you still have the memory of the times together, and the ability (now in the 21st century) to email, speak and skype!

    StrubbleS is right in the sense that perhaps it is time to meet new people. You could volunteer or join activities? I know it seems hard now, but in time you will be glad you did - and doesn't mean you are replacing her.

    Could you make plans to visit her some time in the future? Perhaps this will also be something to look forward to, while you continue to live your own life.

    Big hugs and hope you cheer up soon, keep posting we are all here listening *hug*
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