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Honestly, I'm Falling Apart

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
I'm 17 and i've lost everything. I had family, friends, a good home.. i was in college and maybe i wasn't 100% happy. But at least i got up every morning and cherished every day. Now i just feel lonely and scared all the time. I moved house with my sister while my brothers and my mom went there separate ways. I lost all my friends because a mate spread lies about me. I had to quit college because i was starting to get depressed and i guess i've never gotten happier, i've just learnt who to hide it from. I breaks me to know my family are broken too and that we are all so unhappy. I miss what i had and now i feel like im on a never ending spiral downwards. I've never felt so lonely or lost, i don't really know who i am anymore. I don't see the point in eating and i can hardly sleep, i never go out the house and all i do is sit in my house and cry all day and night. And yes, i do have people i can talk to but they can't change anything. I'm doing some qualifications next month, i'm trying to get my life back on track but how can i when so many things are missing. I feel like utter shit and i get panic attacks in the morning which then makes me more depressed, and the spiral just keeps spinning.. I've hit rock bottom, i'm starting to not see the joy in my days anymore. I just want to escape, i just want my heart to stop breaking.

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hi NeverEndingFall

    sorry to hear that you're feeling so low *hug*

    I know it may not feel like talking to people will change anything but it just might help to make you feel a little better. Have you spoken to your gp about the way you're feel?

    Doing the qualifications won't make everything good again and give you those missing pieces but I think it's a really positive step to begin rebuilding.

    don't give up,

    dp :heart:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I have spoken to my gp and i saw a CAMHS therapist for a while but it didn't work out and i wont go back to it again. I know it wont change everything but it will help me get out of my crappy new area and into university in ireland.

    And i'm pretty near giving up but thank you :')
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