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Posting etiquette - choosing the right forum?

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  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    piccolo wrote: »
    I don't see the references to issues with individuals that people keep referring to so either I'm being a bit obtuse but sometimes there is no agenda other than to have a discussion. Helen has already asked for specifics to be dealt with and no one is being accused of anything publicly; whilst we're giving people the benefit of the doubt maybe that could be extended to posters here? This isn't a malicious place, honestly.

    The tone of some of the posts have been less than objective and verging on personal. That is my opinion. This isn't a malicious place but it IS a place where a relatively small core of members post the vast majority of the posts, and if threads or posts can be seen as being hostile to certain types of content then it will only further discourage new users from joining up or sticking around. Again, my opinion.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    stu147 wrote: »
    The tone of some of the posts have been less than objective and verging on personal. That is my opinion. This isn't a malicious place but it IS a place where a relatively small core of members post the vast majority of the posts, and if threads or posts can be seen as being hostile to certain types of content then it will only further discourage new users from joining up or sticking around. Again, my opinion.

    You may be right. I hope you're not. I know I've been around a while so maybe my perspective is skewed but I haven't noticed any fewer new members lately so I hope on the whole things are still friendly and encouraging.

    Interestingly, the first time I read it I found what you said there to be a bit of a personal dig at a group of users so it just shows that the reader's perspective makes a huge difference because I'm sure that's not what you meant.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    piccolo wrote: »
    Interestingly, the first time I read it I found what you said there to be a bit of a personal dig at a group of users so it just shows that the reader's perspective makes a huge difference because I'm sure that's not what you meant.

    Yeah, that's a good point and a fair one. Interpretation can make all the difference and you could definitely read what I said as an attack on the original post if you just read my one post in isolation. It wasn't my intention, but again that only illustrates your point.

    I think I've said enough in this thread so I'll bow out gracefully :) I have no issues with anyone here, I just put my points forward like anyone else. It takes all sorts to make a world :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    stu147 wrote: »
    Perhaps it should be renamed then? 'Anything Goes' implies precisely that. Yes there are specific forums for specific subjects, but then there is this melting pot of mixed topics that is too vague in description to give any clear indication of what it is and isn't for. There are guidelines, but again they don't rule out posting about issues of a potentially triggering nature as such.

    .



    Anything Goes has always been a random melting pot of light hearted topics, there aren't any guidelines on keeping it light hearted because good posting etiquette would be to recognise the nature of the different boards and to put your queries or problems in the correct one. That way your potentially life changing problem isn't lost in the general randomness of this forum but is in a place where people will see it and will have time to respond before it's "lost" in the digital ether.

    It's very easy to be ignored in Anything Goes.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    To me, anything goes means "anything that doesn't fit elsewhere". IE, birthday threads, the rant / happy news threads, etc.

    I've been here on and off for 6 years. Why does it seem within only this year, we've had the issues of people posting inappropriately?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I am probably guilty of this, I'm sorry.
    It can be confusing when posting on here because there are some threads in the anything goes, such as the ranty thread, where people post in there how they are feeling at the moment or as the title says, to 'have a rant', and some of the posts may be triggering to some people.

    Sometimes it's easier to just have a quick rant on a thread that has already been made for that purpose rather than start a whole new thread when all you want to do is get something off your chest (which is something I am guilty of).

    That's how I see it anyway, and comments which have been made on here might just make someone not post how they are feeling just in fear of offending someone.

    I know it's not my place to say as I have only been here for a month or so, but that's just my opinion.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    hmmm7 wrote: »
    Sometimes it's easier to just have a quick rant on a thread that has already been made for that purpose rather than start a whole new thread when all you want to do is get something off your chest (which is something I am guilty of).

    That is why this thread was made.

    Because we have had this discussion before and it was agreed back then that we keep these things in the appropriate forums so that people aren't made to feel uncomfortable posting in Anything Goes.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    So isn't the ranty thread in the wrong place then?
    Because it's confusing knowing where to post when there are different threads where it could go.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    No. The ranty thread, as I see it, is for general (ie, stuff that doesn't fit elsewhere) rants. Like people moaning about the weather.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    But some people may want to rant that they are feeling rubbish on that day.

    I just don't really see what all the fuss is about.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    That's why Franki made her thread. People don't want to read about others eating disorders, self-harm, etc. I and others I'm sure, avoid Franki's thread because we know said content will be triggering. I don't want to come into what is meant to be a light hearted non-triggering thread and read about someone's eating disorder or whatever.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    hmmm7 wrote: »
    But some people may want to rant that they are feeling rubbish on that day.

    I just don't really see what all the fuss is about.

    The fuss is about people reading things that they don't want to read in a place that should be free from it.

    "I'm feeling rubbish today" and "I've self-harmed/I'm starving myself/other potentially triggering content" are not the same.

    If I am already feeling rubbish, reading that shit doesn't help me. I should have the choice to go and read that if I want to.

    The "I need a hug" thread is the H&WB version of the ranty thread, where people can post the above kind of posts without making other people uncomfortable.

    This site isn't just a site for people with mental health issues, and as such those people who are unfortunate enough to HAVE mental health issues should be courteous enough to realise that not everybody wants to read about how they're suicidal today.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Yeah I do agree with that. It's just confusing sometimes, especially when you're new and haven't been here long and not sure where to post things.
    I will learn from this and I'm sure others will too.
    :thumb:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    hmmm7 wrote: »
    Yeah I do agree with that. It's just confusing sometimes, especially when you're new and haven't been here long and not sure where to post things.
    I will learn from this and I'm sure others will too.
    :thumb:

    Nobody is going to mind too much if a newbie posts in the wrong forum.

    Our problem is when people who were part of the original conversation still continue to disrespect other users by doing it.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    And for anyone who isn't really huggy - there's a H&WB rants thread too. Which might work......
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Not another! :(

    I think most of these wrong forum posts have occured because of these endless "put everything here" threads. Instead of people making their own threads for problems, they have a plethora of negative based threads to put them in (i need a hug, rant, scream, swearing, displeasures...) I'm sure it is hard for members to know where to post things when there is nothing but negativity in every board and they are filled with these giant post all things here.

    Emotions and issues aren't the same as posting what you are listening to, a lot of things probably deserve their own threads and perhaps the posters want to make one but feel like they cannot because of the insane amount of large negative threads that have been created.

    So many places dedicated to negativity everywhere you look!
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I can kind of see your point - but it's more of a how things have turned out rather than how things were intended.

    Rants started off as the ideal place for those little 'Grrrr' moments, like pouring your pasta down the sink, or locking yourself out. It drifted towards being a very negative place, and needs picking back up from that really.

    I see no problem with there being a home for bad days in Health and Well being, or a list of Grrrr moments in Anything Goes, but it needs to stay that way.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    my name wrote: »
    Not another! :(

    I think most of these wrong forum posts have occured because of these endless "put everything here" threads. Instead of people making their own threads for problems, they have a plethora of negative based threads to put them in (i need a hug, rant, scream, swearing, displeasures...) I'm sure it is hard for members to know where to post things when there is nothing but negativity in every board and they are filled with these giant post all things here.
    ...
    So many places dedicated to negativity everywhere you look!

    That is a fair point.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Yeahhhhh.

    I don't really like the idea of a thread filled with negativity - hence why I created my own thread yesterday(?). My thoughts could have quite easily gone in the 'hug' thread, but actually.... I don't want it piled in with all the other negative thoughts. Not because I think that all the attention should be on me or whatever (it wouldn't have mattered if only one person had replied with a hug or something) but I don't want to contribute to some deep dark pit of negativity.... it also means that if I am feeling better, or if something changes, I have the chance to tell you guys about it. I could have written this to make more sense. But ah well.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Some things people do wish to rant about; but really aren't worth starting threads about.

    Where do people post positive mental health stuff?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    In the good things you've done for your wellbeing thread maybe?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I don't know how I forgot about that thread...
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    It slips off really easily. I think my name is right it's just so much easier to think about the negatives sometimes.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    The ideal would be people do like yellow did and start their own thread, but when We tried to nudge the negative out of rants people said that it was important negative stuff had somewhere to go if people weren't confident enough to start their own threads. that's where hugs came from. in many ways I'd love to see it slip down the posts list and for people to start their own. similarly I'd like to see the H&WB rants thread slip down and for people to start their own, but if not the options there.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Yeah I think there's become a pattern of people using the long threads - but maybe we're actually getting people posting stuff they wouldn't have started a thread for (and so wouldn't have posted) and that's good?
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